Is this dress OK?

[User72651]

Is this dress OK for my partner's mum to wear to my wedding (mother of the groom)? I just see a long white dress:

www.shopittome.com/sale/archived/abv6ad8eb88

Too much white.

@EssexLioness

It doesn’t look bridal to me at all. However I do think it’s too white, especially for a bridal party member to wear. Maybe I’m out of touch but I thought this was still seen as bad manners and don’t see the need to choose a mostly white dress when there are so many other lovely options to choose from

This sums up what I mean. I didn't articulate it very well. I don't have concerns about being "upstaged", or people wondering who the bride is. The issue is whether this dress is too white for a woman in the bridal party too wear. Not because it's too 'bridal' but because it is too white. Yes it has flowers but it is a predominantly white dress, which is considered bad form. I understand many people don't care about etiquette though with these kinds of things, so don't understand why it would ever be an issue unless a guest literally turned up in a wedding dress.

I think it's too white for a wedding too. Isn't there is an unwritten rule that only the Bride wears white. Bad taste.

@Aprilx

I don’t like the dress, but there I absolutely nothing wrong with wearing it to a wedding. It is not remotely bridal.

Same here. I'd just let her wear what she's happy in unless she's specifically asked for feedback. Maybe you could show her the bridesmaids dresses as well and see what she thinks?

Yes, I don't see white, I see floral.

All this suburban nonsense about etiquette and manners. At posh weddings people wear black and white/cream and no-one gives a hoot.

I think it's too long and white.

Has MIL seen the bridesmaids' dresses? She might feel a bit daft if her dress looks like them on the day.

I've seen less predominantly white dresses on here get a 'not for a wedding' verdict so I suppose it depends which way the wind is blowing or something .

I wouldn't be enthused. But then I am probably OTT because I stay away from anything even remotely white as a wedding guest.
So many other dresses out there.

[quote TatianaBis]All this suburban nonsense about etiquette and manners. At posh weddings people wear black and white/cream and no-one gives a hoot.

I’m sorry if I made some assumptions, I assume your MIL is seeking your advice? It isn’t something she has already bought and is ready to wear?

Logically it's fine, and I wasn't bothered by the people who wore predominantly white dresses at my own wedding. That said, I'd never wear a dress with a white background as a guest.

Is there something wrong with me? I've never understood this etiquette thing about "out-whiting the bride" -- if a dress is pretty and looks nice on someone, what's wrong with that? what's wrong with a room full of pretty pastels, short and long?

I mean, if a guest turned up in a giant hooped white crinoline with a long lacy train, clutching a bouquet, I might think they were making a point, but then I wouldn't be the only one raising an eyebrow.

Apart from having a white background, I don't see anything overtly "bridal" about this dress. It's nice though!

It's a perfectly suitable dress. It is not remotely bride like.

God, this is pathetic. It looks absolutely nothing like a bridal gown and in the normal world, nobody says you can't wear a floral dress with a pale background to a wedding. In fact a large proportion of wedding-guest style dresses are precisely that - pale with floral patterns. You're obviously doing this because you don't like her for whatever reason. She's spent money on an outfit and you start kicking off for some unspecified reason. First world problems or what.

@Alcemeg

Is there something wrong with me? I've never understood this etiquette thing about "out-whiting the bride" -- if a dress is pretty and looks nice on someone, what's wrong with that? what's wrong with a room full of pretty pastels, short and long?

I mean, if a guest turned up in a giant hooped white crinoline with a long lacy train, clutching a bouquet, I might think they were making a point, but then I wouldn't be the only one raising an eyebrow.

Apart from having a white background, I don't see anything overtly "bridal" about this dress. It's nice though!

Normal people don't give a shit. It's only people on MN who seem to care about this apparently 'well established ettiquette'. Loads of people wear pale colours to weddings.

I think it’s too white as it is, but with a yellow jacket and hat would be fine.

@FirewomanSam

It’s a bit , well dressing gown ish

I just looked again and you are so right. Now I can’t see it as anything else!

I thought Kimono.

Unless someone's clearly trying to upstage the bride, I don't think it's a big deal to wear a clearly non-bridal white dress to a wedding, even though somewhere along the way someone decided that white is a no-no.

Out of all the colours why something with that much white. I dont think yabu, anyone wearing white at my wedding will be frog marcher out

I’d be more than happy
( you should’ve seen what my cousin turned up in)
She looked far more bridal than me 😂

All this suburban nonsense about etiquette and manners. At posh weddings people wear black and white/cream and no-one gives a hoot

Just because posh people do something, doesn't make it right.

Christ. It would never have crossed my mind to have asked my MIL to obtain my prior approval for her outfit at my wedding!

It's a floral dress... Nothing bridal or bridesmaid about it... If its a summer wedding be prepared as many people may opt for pale or floral dresses... As long as nobody turns up in an actual wedding dress I'm sure you'll be fine

I don't understand the too white malarkey unless it's a wedding gown...
My dress was a white wedding gown. MOB wore a cream and white floral midi dress, MOG wore pale pink and white floral midi dress... Bridesmaids were in pink maxi length dresses. They all looked lovely.

My mil wore black!! A funeral style outfit in the middle of a summer heatwave. She was making a statement

Oh it’s fine, but I’d be interested to see a link to the bridesmaid dresses which are similar