To think friend should book?

[HobbyisENetwork]

Friend bought me a spa voucher for my birthday last year and now we can finally go. (Yes I know MN hates spa days).

Anyway I’m trying to book and no one will answer the phone. Automated message says to email and then cuts you off. I email and her told they refuse to book by email.

Told friend about the issues but she didn’t offer to help. I’ve been trying for a few days now and it’s stressful and I feel like actually she should be the one to book it - we’re both going together.

OP, I'm very much enjoying you defending yourself against the arsey responses and wiping the floor with them!

YANBU, in your shoes I would either:

1. Give up and when she asks tell her that it was impossible to book and so you gave up.
2. Book the voucher to go with someone else. She can't dictate who you go with.

So they are responding to email. Email them with your mobile number and request that they phone you as you have been unable to contact them by phone to make a booking.

But it only takes one person to book and, if the OP can’t get through, why would the friend be able to do so?

@StillCoughingandLaughing

I don't expect her friend to get through any more than I expect OP will, but it spreads the work out?! If my friend was trying to book something for us both and it was becoming a hassle, I'd offer to half the workload.

Have you actually asked her to help or are you just hoping she’ll offer?
I might just be petty but if someone is hinting that they want me to do something but won’t directly ask me then I won’t do it until they actually ask.
“Hey (friend), I can’t figure out how the booking system works for the spa we’re going to, could you try and sort it? Thanks”

id tell your friend that youve been trying to get through to them for days, so can she try, otherwise she needs to try get a refund

You have said her reaction made you reconsider asking for help, I think if you had let us know her reaction we might be in a better position to judge. We weren’t part of the conversation and up until then you hadn’t really mentioned that she reacted negatively when you explained to her that you couldn’t get through.

Email them again and ask them to ring you to book as you can't get through - maybe there is something wrong with the phones?

YABU

The spa company is being useless, but you’re blaming your friend for her generous gift and not the spa for their rubbish admin. You haven’t asked for help, you’ve just done the pass-agg hinting that it’s a hassle.

PP have suggested multiple options - PM by Facebook, Twitter, email head office etc. Or just leave it a week for things to settle down and try again.

I would just leave it a couple of weeks and try again.

I am on your side. She has brought you a lovely gift, but a gift she too benefits from and at the moment it is just adding to your list of things to do.

All you want your friend to do is step up and say

"can I help?"

I get it, however, I think you need to communicate and bounce it back to her and ask her to ring a few times and see if she has more luck. She may have a different email address or she could even complain as she paid for it so probably has more rights to raise the issue with a manager.

Just ask her to try too. Easy, communicate with her.

@saveforthat

Of all the many ridiculous posts I have read in my many years on here, this has to be up there in the top ten.

Ditto.

You only have a few options here.

Ask your friend directly if she can help you book rather than wait for her to offer.

Keep going as you are in the hope that you’ll eventually get through to them.

Drive to the spa and book in person.

Forget everything and give up on the spa day altogether.

The last option seems a shame because it really sounds like you need a spa day.

YABVU. I'd like to nominate this thread for 'Classics'.

First world problems eh?

@ALevelhelp

But it only takes one person to book and, if the OP can’t get through, why would the friend be able to do so?

@StillCoughingandLaughing

I don't expect her friend to get through any more than I expect OP will, but it spreads the work out?! If my friend was trying to book something for us both and it was becoming a hassle, I'd offer to half the workload.

But how does it halve the workload? If anything, it’s doubling it - two people stuck on hold instead of one. The spa isn’t answering the phone; it isn’t ignoring the OP specifically.

If the OP had to call 60 people to invite them to an event, for example, then of course asking a friend to split the list and make 30 calls would share the workload. This doesn’t.

I don’t care about being told yabu - I agree I should ask for help. What is horrible and nasty is the pile on of insults that aren’t necessary. You can tell someone they are wrong without resorting to childish insults and character assassination

@HobbyisENetwork - You are wrong.

YANBU

I have no idea why people are being shitty to you @HobbyisENetwork .

Of course it's stressful trying to get through to an automated service, unsuccessfully we've all been there with other services.

The only thing I think you are being unreasonable about is your passiveness. Your friend is going to the spa too so yes I agree it should be a joint attempt to book as it is proving to be difficult.

I would simply text her something along the lines of: Jane, I just cannot get through to book our spa day. Please can you have a go now? Thanks.

The end! And to be honest I would just give up for a while. Is there a time limit to use it? Because at the moment it is just not worth the hassle. And three hours away?? It better be good .

You've tried 10 times, you've listed here 26 times.

You're causing your own stress.

Stress of phoning ten times.
Stress of keep posting and arguing (in the main) that YANBU.

*posted not listed

@StillCoughingandLaughing , if my friend was getting stressed trying to get through and continuously not getting an answer I would offer to take over with the calls, or say you try in the morning, I'll try in the afternoon - hopefully one of us will eventually get through. In my opinion that is halving the workload.

Lol, another poster who asks AIBU, doesn't get the response they wanted, then spends the morning defending themselves.

Why bother asking AIBU if you've already decided you aren't?

Then please tell me how to book it if

1. Phones are just automated and don’t ring or have voicemail options
2. When they do respond to emails they just repeat that you do need to call
3. The place is a 3 hour drive from me
4. I’ve commented/messaged on their Instagram page and nothing and also saw one review on trustpilot that said they were deleting bad online reviews

I understand all that completely, but how will it be different if your friend tries the same methods that haven't worked?

1. Screenshot all the call logs/ social media messages and emails that youve sent with no response
2. Speak to your friend and explain, ask her to ask for a refund or claim back from hwr card provider because you've been unable to book. For a credit card this is a Section 75 claim.

"It’s a spa day for us BOTH. We’re only going if it gets booked so yes she does hold responsibility because if I don’t do it then she won’t be going."

But to be fair op, one person does usually take on the responsibility of booking, and it's usually the person in ownership of the voucher or gift card.

One someone has said that they'll book, it would be a bit odd for the other person to ask or offer to do it imo.

Certainly if a friend was booking a table or tickets, I wouldn't jump in to say that I'd try too. I'd assume that was a bit patronising, like I thought she was doing something wrong or I could do it better.

Be cross with the rubbish spa not the nice friend who bought you a gift.