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Original poster

My 16yo DS and his girlfriend (Part 3)

999 replies

workworkworkugh · 14/05/2021 22:24

Link to part 2:

My 16yo DS and his girlfriend (Part 2) http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/amiibeingunreasonable/4223467-my-16yo-ds-and-his-girlfriend-part-2

Someone recommended I start another thread. I was a bit hesitant to do so I will admit.
I truly thought this would have been over in January, but here we are Confused

OP posts:
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6
Original poster
workworkworkugh · 07/06/2021 03:39

Thank everyone.
He's still here, no plans that I know of to go to the mothers house when that time comes but will see I guess.
Still up and down but had another appt with my psych today which was really helpful so will try and out some of her suggestions into practice (some of which has already been suggested here).

OP posts:
BlueButtercups · 07/06/2021 04:00

Glad he's still at home @workworkworkugh

Im also happy to see you are looking after your own mental wellbeing, you've all taken an emotional battering.

🌸

vivariumvivariumsvivaria · 07/06/2021 12:11

Well, that's hugely encouraging!

Great news.

LoudestCat14 · 07/06/2021 13:08

Glad to hear he's still at home, OP. Hopefully the longer he stays put, the less of a hold she'll have over him.

ThumbWitchesAbroad · 07/06/2021 13:23

Oh that IS good news, for now at least.
Glad the your psych is proving helpful too. Thanks

Mix56 · 07/06/2021 14:59

GF must be livid. How is his academic performance, is he still doing the necessary work? ?

dapsnotplimsolls · 07/06/2021 18:13

Glad to hear things are ok and that the psych is giving you tips and strategies.

itsgettingwierd · 07/06/2021 18:19

He's still home so that's great.

Glad you are getting the support you need through this.

Tistheseason17 · 07/06/2021 21:31

🤞🤞🤞

butterpuffed · 08/06/2021 09:40

Good that your DS has been home for a while and no trouble from the gf unlike before👍

Mulhollandmagoo · 08/06/2021 23:08

Not much to add really, except that I hope you're doing ok? I've been following this and have to say you're doing an amazing job Flowers fingers crossed he sees sense soon

Sssloou · 09/06/2021 10:57

Really glad to hear that you have professional support to deal with this exhausting, very complex and highly irregular situation. Know that that family is dysfunctional, that the GF is unstable and abusive and that requires a difficult and different approach to release your DS from it. Don’t underestimate the toll that this will take on you, your DH, your marriage and family life. Give yourself enough extra space and compassion to cope through this abnormal situation.

You are doing well.

Keep strategic and calm. This is what will work.

Justilou1 · 09/06/2021 23:07

How is he at home now @workworkworkugh? And you? How are you and the rest of the family coping? Are you all beginning to settle back into normalcy yet?

Mummyoflittledragon · 11/06/2021 09:57

@workworkworkugh
Is your ds still at home seeing as it’s the mum’s turn? I do hope so. If he is, I imagine you can finally relax.

Slayduggee · 11/06/2021 11:21

So glad to hear that your DS is home (and still home)

LAgeDeRaisin · 13/06/2021 21:07

How are things now, OP?

Original poster
workworkworkugh · 14/06/2021 00:22

Thank for checking in.
We're doing ok, a few minor ups and downs but nothing major.

The GF went to her Mums Friday night and DS asked if he could sleep over (there is an obv pattern the parents refuse to see) because he asked we said No but we weren't going to fight him on it if he insisted, but he ended up coming home 🤷🏻‍♀️
He came home the last two nights as well with no dramas/argument.

It's actually made me feel a little uneasy, like it's the calm before the storm but I might just be on edge from all the things that's have happened in the past.
We of course don't know the things GF is saying or messaging to DS but maybe she has calmed down as well.

OP posts:
BlueDaises · 14/06/2021 00:55

It's actually made me feel a little uneasy, like it's the calm before the storm but I might just be on edge from all the things that's have happened in the past.

It's understandable to feel uneasy.. you know the script.. the pattern is a well worn path for you all.. and it's clearer to you, through wise eyes and the experience of these past few months..

Did he find another job at all..

Either way, Im happy for you that things appear calmer, for now at least.. 🌷

MyOtherProfile · 14/06/2021 07:49

Not surprised you feel uneasy. Hopefully though he has begun to realise it's all a bit much and is less embroiled with her.

Justilou1 · 14/06/2021 08:18

I can understand why you are getting twitchy… I very much doubt that her parents have suddenly learned how to set boundaries like normal people. Perhaps the GF has set her sights elsewhere and is just hanging out with your DS until her next victim is looking like a more certain catch.

Original poster
workworkworkugh · 14/06/2021 09:47

No it's definitely not her parents doing haha
I know she has been working a lot, most days it seems, so that's keeping her busy. Disappointing to see DS still sitting around home during these times and not taking the opportunity to see his friends or pick up work shifts of his own, but while we can suggest it, that's up to him.

He has (finally!) organised work experience for in a couple of weeks so that's a positive!

OP posts:
BlueDaises · 14/06/2021 14:28

Work experience will be fantastic for him, he'll be mixing with lots of new people, and have a great time, great news. 🌺

cameocat · 14/06/2021 16:37

I can understand that you're feeling uneasy. It may be the calm before the storm or it may slowly unravel (fingers crossed!)

FunMcCool · 14/06/2021 18:17

Glad things are going ok!

itsgettingwierd · 14/06/2021 18:28

Let's hope it's all calming down.

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