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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I've been bad - damaged someone's car in carpark

368 replies

GuiltyMoo · 14/05/2021 17:02

I came back to my car in a supermarket car park to find that someone had parked their car with their passenger side way too close to my drivers side. So close that I couldn't get past their wingmirror to get to the door. So I had to bend my wingmirror in to squeeze past. Then I had to do contortions to open the door and then get in. I accidentally knocked their wingmirror out of position and dented and scratched their door doing so.

I confess that at that point I was so furious that I let my car door bang again against the other car. I then drove out of the space, stopped, got out and went back to put their wingmirror back in place.

I am now at home feeling super guilty, waiting for a knock on my door from the Police after they track me down from the carpark CCTV.

So, AIBU for squeezing into my car and causing the damage? Should I have gone back to the supermarket and had them call the driver to move their car so I could get in mine?

I'm a big worrier, and this will pop into my head for years to come, as another moment of shame.

OP posts:
Sillyduckseverywhere · 15/05/2021 12:09

I now alway park next to a pillar or wall so I can't be blocked in like that again.
The car park supervisor saw me do it and laughed 🤷‍♀️

Hubstar · 15/05/2021 12:11

Someone hit my car and left me with £1600 worth of damage

I think you should be done for criminal damage. But we had a whole host of things. We had their paint on our car. We had their car with mirrored damage. The police went round. He said wasn’t me. End of. That was it! I was seething. We were stuck with that damage. I couldn’t do it personally

I’m disabled and have a whole host of medicinal equipment that I have to lug around. Think oxygen tank etc. It’s not. But that’s the closest. I had someone park close that I couldn’t get in with my equipment. So I just had to wait it out.

EarringsandLipstick · 15/05/2021 12:11

Sillyduck

Regardless of the rights or wrongs of the other person's parking, this is vile. The fact the car park attendant laughed is even worse.

I've been really shocked at some of the things people on this thread think are ok. 😳

EarringsandLipstick · 15/05/2021 12:12

@Hubstar

Someone hit my car and left me with £1600 worth of damage

I think you should be done for criminal damage. But we had a whole host of things. We had their paint on our car. We had their car with mirrored damage. The police went round. He said wasn’t me. End of. That was it! I was seething. We were stuck with that damage. I couldn’t do it personally

I’m disabled and have a whole host of medicinal equipment that I have to lug around. Think oxygen tank etc. It’s not. But that’s the closest. I had someone park close that I couldn’t get in with my equipment. So I just had to wait it out.

That's awful. 😞
3Britnee · 15/05/2021 12:13

@BeenHereForAges

You deliberately let your door bang against their car door causing dents and scratches? Well that sounds like criminal damage OP.
Sounds like karma, to me. Park like a dick and your car WILL get fucked up eventually 🤷‍♀️
Sillyduckseverywhere · 15/05/2021 12:16

@EarringsandLipstick

Sillyduck

Regardless of the rights or wrongs of the other person's parking, this is vile. The fact the car park attendant laughed is even worse.

I've been really shocked at some of the things people on this thread think are ok. 😳

I really don't care what people think of it. There were literally hundreds of free parking spaces and he (because let's be honest, it was a guy) deliberately did that to me. Maybe next time he won't.
3Britnee · 15/05/2021 12:16

It could have been done by accident you know. Have you never pulled out on someone, cut a corner, gone a bit too fast or slow, realised you're hogging the middle lane, forgot to indicate or any of the other driving crimes that mark someone as a dick but we're actually due to a moment of thoughtlessness or preoccupation? Why jump to the conclusion that the driver saw that she'd parked too close, shrugged, cackled evilly and walked off? We'd all be better off if a few more people could at least attempt to see things from a less egocentric view

How do you park badly by accident?

kowari · 15/05/2021 12:21

@3Britnee

It could have been done by accident you know. Have you never pulled out on someone, cut a corner, gone a bit too fast or slow, realised you're hogging the middle lane, forgot to indicate or any of the other driving crimes that mark someone as a dick but we're actually due to a moment of thoughtlessness or preoccupation? Why jump to the conclusion that the driver saw that she'd parked too close, shrugged, cackled evilly and walked off? We'd all be better off if a few more people could at least attempt to see things from a less egocentric view

How do you park badly by accident?

Quickly, preoccupied with running into the shop to get essentials, you don't know the situation. I always check I am in the lines, but there have been times I have been close and I'm not straightening the car if I have an unwell child at home or similar. As long as I'm in the lines it's not my problem.
Sillyduckseverywhere · 15/05/2021 12:24

You don't park badly by accident.
You make a conscious decision to leave it like that.

Alcemeg · 15/05/2021 12:28

@Sillyduckseverywhere

You don't park badly by accident. You make a conscious decision to leave it like that.
Your case was a bit weird. But in a busy car park, cars are coming and going all the time. The way the car next to you is parked could be the result of the way other cars, since gone, were parked next to them.
3Britnee · 15/05/2021 12:30

@Sillyduckseverywhere

I had a van park so close to me in an EMPTY carpark that I had to struggle over from the passenger side. I covered the handles and windscreen in the only thing I had to hand. Suncream. Inconvenience me, I'll Inconvenience you.
👏👏👏
BoredatHome321 · 15/05/2021 12:32

@Sillyduckseverywhere

I had a van park so close to me in an EMPTY carpark that I had to struggle over from the passenger side. I covered the handles and windscreen in the only thing I had to hand. Suncream. Inconvenience me, I'll Inconvenience you.
I'm sure they were absolutely fuming at some sun cream that can easily be washed off with screen washHmm. I guess it's better than deliberately banging your car door into theirs though.
custardbear · 15/05/2021 12:32

This happened to me, asda were great, kept making announcements, shitty Parker didn't turn up, ended up getting in the passenger side when they returned (they were parked fine, drivers side a big Range Rover so was parked over my lines 🤬🤬🤬
I nearly got a hernia Getting over to the other side of my little BMW .... I always now park more to passenger lines 😳

kowari · 15/05/2021 12:33

@Sillyduckseverywhere

You don't park badly by accident. You make a conscious decision to leave it like that.
I have a small car, a large car would take up the same space parked straight as mine at a bit of an angle. As long as a car is in the space they've done nothing wrong. I normally park dead in the middle regardless of how anyone else is parked, but there have been times I have chosen to focus on more important things.
Sillyduckseverywhere · 15/05/2021 12:34

@BoredatHome321
It's greasy as fuck.
Guarantee it ruined his day Smile

BoredatHome321 · 15/05/2021 12:37

@Sillyduckseverywhere haha, did make me chuckle even if it is wrong.. like I said better than damaging the car Wink

thecatsthecats · 15/05/2021 12:41

Unless someone does something obviously awful like parking perpendicular to the bays, I try not to judge other's parking. You don't know the circumstances in which they parked.

Once I got to the bays in Aldi, and every other car in the row was parked on an odd slant, so I had to fit in to the only place available on the same slant to be a sensible distance from the other cars. I come back, and of course I'm the only one left looking like a twat.

EarringsandLipstick · 15/05/2021 14:56

I really don't care what people think of it.

You don't care about being an absolute arse Sillyduck?

Of course that driver was one too. But you are responsible for your own behaviour. It doesn't correlate that you can act badly because s/he did.

I'd feel sick about myself if that was the poor standard I held myself to.

TopBlogger · 15/05/2021 15:12

@Sillyduckseverywhere

You don't park badly by accident. You make a conscious decision to leave it like that.
100% agree. No excuse for "saving" 30 seconds by not re parking if you are over the line. If it is ok and everyone has a valid excuse ("I had a call and HAD to chuck the car anywhere I could...yada yada" Hmm), why have them in the 1st place? There is a reason people get fined for parking over the lines, it is because it is utterly selfish and thoughtless
Sillyduckseverywhere · 15/05/2021 15:22

@EarringsandLipstick

I really don't care what people think of it.

You don't care about being an absolute arse Sillyduck?

Of course that driver was one too. But you are responsible for your own behaviour. It doesn't correlate that you can act badly because s/he did.

I'd feel sick about myself if that was the poor standard I held myself to.

And I will continue to be a happy scumbag that really doesn't give a fuck. I didn't act badly. That's your yardstick, not mine. It's ever so freeing. And I'm pretty certain the selfish twat will think twice about doing it again. Who knows?

People put up with shitty behaviour. There's no consequences so they continue to act like assholes. I'm done with being nice. Apart from to dogs and people with manners Smile I'm always nice to them.

BiscoffAddict · 15/05/2021 15:23

@EarringsandLipstick

Sillyduck

Regardless of the rights or wrongs of the other person's parking, this is vile. The fact the car park attendant laughed is even worse.

I've been really shocked at some of the things people on this thread think are ok. 😳

It’s Suncream. It will have washed off!
Fatladyslim · 15/05/2021 15:27

It's moments like these OP that the best think to do is mentally key twat into their car and then climb in through the passenger side

BiscoffAddict · 15/05/2021 15:34

I can’t believe people keep saying that in this situation you should climb through the passenger side! I’d struggle to do that I’m youngish and able bodied! How is someone elderly or disabled meant to?! If you park too close to me and I bang your door trying to get back in well then it’s your ducking fault. Deal with. Good look proving it’s been done deliberately as I will just say it’s was an accident 😉

mumsiedarlingrevolta · 15/05/2021 15:40

I think banging your door against another car deliberately and spitefully is an awful thing to do-

but to then post a thread triumphantly announcing your actions and infantilising and trivialising your behaviour with the title
"I have been bad" makes it even worse.

I've been really shocked at some of the things people on this thread think are ok. 😳
me too @EarringsandLipstick

Bluntness100 · 15/05/2021 15:40

@BiscoffAddict

I can’t believe people keep saying that in this situation you should climb through the passenger side! I’d struggle to do that I’m youngish and able bodied! How is someone elderly or disabled meant to?! If you park too close to me and I bang your door trying to get back in well then it’s your ducking fault. Deal with. Good look proving it’s been done deliberately as I will just say it’s was an accident 😉
Lovely. You do know you’re not allowed to leave rhe scene of an accident right in all your on line bravado?