Child free weddings are for megalomaniacs

[DrunkPosting]

Unless you are consummating the marriage during the ceremony, then it isn’t an adults only type of event

@littlepattilou

So, according to some people on here, a childfree wedding is the ONLY TIME you can ever go ANYWHERE where there are no children?

You can't ever EVER go to any other child free party/function/do/meal out EVER ???

If you can get someone to look after your kids for a wedding, why can people not get someone to look after them while you go for a meal, or to a hen night, or a party, or to the pub (where there will also more than likely be no children?)

A child free wedding is the ONLY thing you can go to where there are no children? REALLY?
What a bizarre existence some people do lead.

who is saying that?

The bridezillas who refused children ag their weddings (including breast feeding babes in arms), are all divorced now.
The ones that made it a family occasion, to celebrate the marriage with the people who have gone onto help them through it, are all still married.
People lose their minds over one day forgetting they’re actually getting married!

@emilyfrost

YABU. A wedding should be how the bride and groom want it, so if they want it childfree, good for them.

Our wedding was childfree and I’d 100% have it that way again. Our guests with children managed to find childcare but if they hadn’t I wouldn’t have made any exceptions, not even for breastfed newborns.

Weddings are not appropriate for children.

I find the idea that wedding are not appropriate for children extraordinary!

For me, weddings are about the bringing together of two people, their families and their friends. What could be more natural than including the children of those families and friends?

I couldn't invite as many people as I would have liked to my wedding but we prioritised family and close friends and it wouldn't have occurred to me to exclude their children. Perhaps because most people were having to travel quite a way (it was in outer London where we lived, but most family lived miles away and even most of those who in London weren't close).

I quite accept that excluding children might be necessary when you are severely restricted in numbers - eg because of Covid.

@Amammai

Sitting through a ceremony and speeches plus a long formal meal might be fine for an older child but for an under 10 I should imagine it’s pretty dull, unless they are a bridesmaid etc? Also, with little children there, guests would probably need to leave earlier. And as PP have said, most venues have limited numbers and you pay full price for food at some venues too!

Pretty dull for adults as well!

@3scape

Child haters unite eh. It's a family occaision. No matter how much pretension you try to whack on it.

And if the family consists of zero children where do you suggest we get them from, grab them off the street so we can have a bit of joy? The number of people who can't get their heads around the fact that for some us children do not equal joy is astounding.

@Chamonixshoopshoop

The bridezillas who refused children ag their weddings (including breast feeding babes in arms), are all divorced now. The ones that made it a family occasion, to celebrate the marriage with the people who have gone onto help them through it, are all still married. People lose their minds over one day forgetting they’re actually getting married!

Nope. Married 23 years, very happily. No kids at our wedding, mostly as no one we knew had any at the time.

The bridezillas who refused children ag their weddings (including breast feeding babes in arms), are all divorced now.
The ones that made it a family occasion, to celebrate the marriage with the people who have gone onto help them through it, are all still married.

Firstly, not my experience at all

Secondly, why is it only family that ‘help people through’ a marrriage? Why not friends?

Thirdly, your last point makes no sense as it’s hardly small children giving that kind of support.

I love a child free wedding.

It means a great night out with my friends, dressed up, nice food, good booze, a boogie and no kids to worry about. Plus a nice night in a hotel and a great breakfast in the morning.

Leave them with the grandparents - they will have much more fun there anyway.

@Chamonixshoopshoop

The bridezillas who refused children ag their weddings (including breast feeding babes in arms), are all divorced now. The ones that made it a family occasion, to celebrate the marriage with the people who have gone onto help them through it, are all still married. People lose their minds over one day forgetting they’re actually getting married!

Oh bloody hell. I know several people (my sister included) who has children at their weddings, who are now divorced, and several people who didn't who are still happily married. Your wedding day makes no difference to the length of your marriage. It's just a day, a big party. What's important is the marriage. So if people want kids at their party, good for them. If they don't, good for them.

The bridezillas who refused children ag their weddings (including breast feeding babes in arms), are all divorced now. The ones that made it a family occasion, to celebrate the marriage with the people who have gone onto help them through it, are all still married

Absolute unmitigated bullshit.

I cannot believe anyone thinks that there is a link between the kind of wedding you choose to have and the success of the marriage.

@Chamonixshoopshoop

The bridezillas who refused children ag their weddings (including breast feeding babes in arms), are all divorced now. The ones that made it a family occasion, to celebrate the marriage with the people who have gone onto help them through it, are all still married. People lose their minds over one day forgetting they’re actually getting married!

Please show your work. I'm sure we'd all love to see it.

The way in which people try to layer bullshit moral judgement on this, simply because they want their kids invited to the parties, is strange.

@TheKeatingFive

The way in which people try to layer bullshit moral judgement on this, simply because they want their kids invited to the parties, is strange.

Very well said.

Please show your work. I'm sure we'd all love to see it.

Since she pulled that "fact" out of her arse, I think we're better off not seeing the source.

My own view is that it's important to include in major events like this so they learn about the society they live in.

Just so long as the doting parents take them out when they scream... I spent the key part of a close friend's marriage ceremony standing with a fussing baby in they alleyway outside.

We love kids but had a child free wedding because we couldn’t afford to organise things that would be child friendly. We also had a very small limit on numbers. It was a home made wedding. We had lots of candles and didn’t think that would be ideal and would mean the parents would have to observe them constantly. We wanted friends to be able to relax and cut loose. It’s personal choice. If we could have afforded childcare and entertainment to allow the adults to relax we would have loved to have children there.

DH and I had a child free wedding.

At the time none of our close family or friends had children under the age of 18.

The parents of younger children among our guests were more distant relatives or friends, and we’d either never met their children or had only met them once or twice.

If it makes us megalomaniacs to want our guest list to be made up entirely of people we actually know well enough to recognise when we walk past them, then so be it.

If we were getting married now, then TBH, while we’d be inviting the likes of nephews / nieces, we’d probably still be looking at not inviting those children that we’d never met (unless there were exceptional circumstances like breastfed babies).

My DSis had a child free wedding. When she married, almost all her friends already had one or two children and to include them would've effectively halved her guest list.

I don't know if she would have made an exception had I not been able to find childcare for my DD, but I would've understood if not (and gone without DH).

If she'd set a dress code with a colour scheme or something, I'd have thought she was a megalomaniac but not for choosing who to invite to her own wedding, no.

Op threw the grenade in and run, eh👀

We said no kids because of a specific set of children. Step mother in laws nephews- spoilt, unruly, rude and always in tracksuits whatever the occasion.
Nobody wanted them there so we said no children except the wedding parties.

They still asked to bring their brats.

I loved my child-free wedding. It was the dream. All our friends letting their hair down and having a thoroughly good time with no kids screaming, running amok, whining, tantrumming etc. I now have a 3yo and even if invite said she could come we would be trying to leave her with my parents so we could really enjoy ourselves with our friends!

Yabu. I wanted a child free wedding or at least no child or baby under 10 and that includes breast feed babies. The reason was my gran was vvvv ill and sudden noises gave her severe pain. The brain tumour killed her sadly within 6 months but she got to my wedding. Everyone who came to the wedding understood and noise was kept to minimal so she could enjoy seeing the family which sadly was the the last time I saw her.

I went to BiL's wedding when my DC were little (DD 2 and DS 9).
They had been invited but it was a PITA for me as I was the main one making sure DD was ok (DH was best man so v busy ) we were living overseas at the time and came back especially - DS loved it as he met all the old uncles and aunts and got money off them and made an absolute fortune He also learnt if he went to the bar to fetch people drinks, he'd get to keep the change (20 years ago when we used cash and in a v rural hotel in Ireland).

[quote littlepattilou]@CokeDrinker

Wrong. It's an ADULTS occasion. Weddings are not for children. Pure, plain, clear and simple. Full stop. Period.

You are obviously taking the piss right?[/quote]
@littlepattilou Nope, I think people who say children should be at weddings are taking the piss. Weddings are miserable for children (I find people who think children belong at weddings are too selfish to consider what the children want), all dressed up, must sit still for hours, can't run around, etc, it is utterly miserable for them!

And as I said before, lewd Best Man/etc speeches, alcohol flowing, etc. It's child appropriate. To say the least, same as Hens Nights and Bucks Nights aren't for children. Weddings are Adults Only events, they are not meant for children. It is really odd to me that people consider them 'family' events for children. They are not. This is obvious.