To ask if you personally judge people who dress alternatively?

[getyourfreakon]

As per the thread title.
Yes, Coronation Street has highlighted the issue. I'm what would be referred to as a "goth". I'm also a mother of one.
What are your feelings on the subject?

I'd be lying if I said I don't make judgements about people based on what they look like- what else do you have to go on if you don't know them or have never spoken to them?

@askingrandomsonlinemighthelp Yes, I also think it is a uniform rather than individual self-expression. I say that as someone who also wore it all when much younger.

I'm older now and I like to create my own looks without regards to fashion. I feel this is much more expressive of my personality than buying 'hippy clothes' and wearing lip and nose rings ever was. And I still incorporate elements. Wouldn't be without my DMs and converse.

Yes @MedusasBadHairDay ,I was referring to Sophie Lancaster,I watched a documentary about it,it was tragic .

It depends. Don't care what they wear but if people start calling themselves 'alternative' or 'not normal' (especially in a way that implies 'normal' is boring / inferior) I do eyeroll a bit.

To me it implies a lack of confidence - people who think that their 'outrageous' looks are the most interesting thing about them.

But I'd make that judgement based on actions, not looks.

I resent the phrase "dress alternatively" for being a vague phrase that means nothing. Therefore the thread discussion means nothing. Google and tell me what the "dress alternatively" look is.

If you mean Goth then SAY Goth.

I wouldn’t judge alternative dressers, the more the better, in fact.

I do judge lazy though, such as people out and about in manky looking pyjamas and slippers

I was judged as a teen and bullied/attacked for being a “goth” and “grunger” I love rock and alternative music, I love wearing alternative clothing but it seems to come hand in hand with judgement.
I do feel it’s been less in my 20s and 30s though, especially since shops like H&M starting promoting band tees and “rock chick” styles etc but I’ve faced my fair share of discrimination over my clothing and music tastes.

I don't like the goth look but I'm sure goths think the way I dress is utterly revolting too, so no bad feelings on either side

However, I like 'theme' dressing (for the last 40 years I have dressed as a sporty person who enjoys listening to hip hop) and I do find myself wondering why some people are so happy to look so bland, so much of the time.

Am quite sure those people also think I look revolting but it genuinely doesn't bother me because I know I rock!

@Mrgrinch

I do. It's embarrassing for the children.

Ridiculous comment. My dad was a big hairy biker. 6ft 7, hair down to his waist, wore leathers. I used to love him picking me up from school. People would comment about how 'cool' my dad was. He is 60 now and although he is grey he hasnt changed a bit. Never been embarrassed of him in my life. Then I don't conform to social norms either. My kids love my clothes. And my 7 year old is growing his hair like his grandad.

Yes I judge them.

I judge them positively and admire their confidence to be different and I often admire their individual style.

Love that people dress how they want. I was a goth back in the day :-)

But all the goths that poster has met are insecure @TheCrowening so it must be the case with every alternative person! 😁
Imagines the goths backing away slowly from their over-eager wannabe-friend

I guess the way I dress would be classed as alternative, I don't make a conscious effort to do it, but I suppose it goes in line with my music taste (a fair few band t-shirts in there).

[quote Mumoblue]@Mrgrinch
Is it? I was never embarrassed by the way my parents dress. We had a good old laugh about the time a woman asked my mum in a car park if she “worshipped the devil”. [/quote]
I don't find that funny in the slightest to be honest.

@fluffythedragonslayer

I used to go to "goth night" with a boyfriend at uni, I was very much not a goth and I used to find it hilarious that all these non conformists looked the same, danced the same etc. The boyfriend would get really annoyed with me when I'd talk about satan's choreography (all the headbanging goths in sync). And I wasn't accepted by his people because I would wear sparkly trainers and a blur t shirt and my hair was pink. Not a scrap of black on me, I was like a colourful little flower fairy. Our relationship was destined to fail.

Now I'm super old and still love a sparkly trainer and still have pink hair. Much fatter and less fairy like though. No idea about the boyfriend and whether he is still a goth.

So in my experience I have been judged for not being alternative enough. Which is quite the irony, I'd say. I do think alt people can come across as thinking they are better because they express themselves and don't conform to the mainstream.

I'm not sure i'd be brave enough to go to a goth club in bright colours these days 😂

Why would you go to a Goth night if you don't like the music or the dancing ,fair enough it's not your style but you didn't need to take the piss out of them .

Not sure teenage DS has ever found my slightly punk look embarrassing. He did however get a bit cross the other day when I scooped up the wrong drunk teen from the pub. They all looked the same with their floppy hair and masks on. Luckily one of them was on the ball and pointed out my error.

I honestly couldn't care...... I manage to look ridiculous halfthe time without even trying so I've no right to judge anybody who dresses in a way that I don't.

I think it's virtually impossible to get no impressions about people from the way they present themselves. If we haven't met them, it's the only thing we have to go on. And people have chosen to dress the way they do, sometimes precisely in order to create an impression, or an expression of their personality. But that doesn't mean our impressions have to be negative or judgmental. I'd be judgy about someone wearing an offensive slogan or an 'I love Donald Trump' t-shirt. Or if they were wearing bondage gear or a bikini on the high street. And there are looks that I don't aesthetically like very much. But no, I wouldn't at all judge someone for having an alternative style.

Anyone under about 40, I don’t bat an eyelid. As a young mum I had bright red hair, shaved at the sides! But when I see people in their 50’s/60’s still going full on goth, mod, rocker etc then yeah I do find it a bit odd I suppose, like they’re trying to cling to their youth. I remember a guy I knew in his 50’s, very little hair left but would fashion what he had into a quiff! Looked ridiculous!

I’m in my 50s now and I do wear what I like, I have a pair of hello kitty converse that I love! So it’s not as if I’m a total conformist. But I do think there should be some adaptation as you age. To me that’s a natural progression. But obviously that is just my opinion!

@AgeLikeWine

I can’t honestly say I understand why some people choose dress as stereotypical goths, hipsters etc. Clearly, they wish to visibly identify with a tribe, but to me it just looks like the opposite of genuine individuality. I’m sure they couldn’t care less what I think, though.

Why would they?

I feel like this.

Fluffy don't worry....... You werent judged for not being alternative enough. You were judged for being an arsehole.

Of course people judge others on how they dress, we all do, all the time.

No. I was a goth back in the 80's. I was shy in reality, but chose clothes to make me stand out.

In fact, I think it's a shame that there aren't more youth subcultures. Now most teenagers look the same. Loved seeing goths, punks, mods, rockers, New Romantics etc when I was growing up. Less individuality now.

Only if they are desperately trying to get attention- then yell at you when you gaze vaguely in their direction. There are certain people near my office who do this - loud and exaggerated movements, then hurl abuse or make sexualised comments if anyone catches their eye.

Apart from that, wear what you like (but please no bare bums, I draw the mine at that).

@Meruem

Anyone under about 40, I don’t bat an eyelid. As a young mum I had bright red hair, shaved at the sides! But when I see people in their 50’s/60’s still going full on goth, mod, rocker etc then yeah I do find it a bit odd I suppose, like they’re trying to cling to their youth. I remember a guy I knew in his 50’s, very little hair left but would fashion what he had into a quiff! Looked ridiculous!

I’m in my 50s now and I do wear what I like, I have a pair of hello kitty converse that I love! So it’s not as if I’m a total conformist. But I do think there should be some adaptation as you age. To me that’s a natural progression. But obviously that is just my opinion!

Why?

No. Sometimes I take a 2nd glance.
I try not. DD is 12 and interested in alternative clothing anime/goth she has ASD it makes her a target.
I am hoping she'll hide it I'm secondary school starting September.