To ask if you personally judge people who dress alternatively?

[getyourfreakon]

As per the thread title.
Yes, Coronation Street has highlighted the issue. I'm what would be referred to as a "goth". I'm also a mother of one.
What are your feelings on the subject?

[Griefmonster]

I agree with a couple of PPs that I don't see most specific ways of dressing as particularly 'alternative' . To me it's more a kind of group affiliation - whether that be "goth", "mod", "hipster" etc. It's surely purposefully aligning yourself with a particular way of dressing? Baffled by the poster who derides one type of group clothing and make up (eyebrows, contouring) and believes another more "alternative" is somehow superior. I just can't understand why anyone can be bothered to care how other people express themselves or find their place in the world...

[user1473878824]

In all honestly, probably a little bit for about five seconds and then I couldn’t care less really!

[bluebluezoo]

Baffled by the poster who derides one type of group clothing and make up (eyebrows, contouring) and believes another more "alternative" is somehow superior

I didn’t say it is superior, just that I prefer looks other than that mainstream look girls go for these days.

[TheGoogleMum]

Nah I used to hang out with a pretty alternative crowd, especially in late teens.

[CirclesWithinCircles]

I quite like individuality. Goths generally look good to me. I remember seeing something on tv about a young guy who dressed in self-designed and tailored Regency dress, and he looked incredible.

[MedusasBadHairDay]

@x2boys

No i used to dress alternatively ,I don't watch current Corrie
But I believe they have based the storyline on the young Goth couple that got attacked in Bacup a few years ago ,and she subsequently died from her injuries ,awful .

Are you talking about Sophie Lancaster? That was awful. Remember being sat in a largely goth pub a week or so after, and it was a properly sombre atmosphere. Heartbreaking.

[HalfShrunkMoreToGo]

@Wearywithteens

I wouldn’t judge them - I try and befriend them as all the adult ‘goths’ I’ve met have difficult backstories and have big insecurities. They need tlc.

Eh?

Most of my friends and acquaintance are 'alternative' because I am and so tend to socialise with other alternative people. Some have had bad experiences,some haven't, some need more TLC, some don't, just like any other group.

It's a bit odd and patronising to assume folks dress in goth style because of some deep emotional problem. Personally I like a 1950s rockabilly/pinup mixed up with 80s metal/rock T-shirt's, jeans, leather jacket type of look. I have friends who lean more towards punk, electro goth, steampunk, grunge, kawaii..... it tends to link more with the media, cultures and era they must enjoy than with their life traumas.

[greenlynx]

I always make some assumptions about people based on their clothes, it’s not deliberate rather subconscious and I would happily change my assumptions later on.
I would probably think about very alternative dresses person that no way we will be friends - I’m very boring “jeans and plain t-shirt” type.

[RantyAnty]

No, people can wear what they want. I do find it funny that with alternative they tend to look like every other alternative person so not really unique or expressing themselves.

[DramaAlpaca]

Judge you? God no, I was you in my youth so I wouldn't turn a hair. My adult DC are boringly conventional I look back on my own goth days in the 80s with great fondness.

[Foodisascience]

It’s not really alternative though is it it’s just a uniform of another name.
I probably wouldn’t even notice if I’m honest.

[Saltyslug]

I’d prefer to spend time with someone into retro clothes, heavy metal clothes or crazy home knitted jumpers with DMs to someone very cliche in high fashion ware. Probably more likely to assume the alternative person is interesting. Could be wrong in my assumption.

[PuttingOnTheKitsch]

No judgement here, except of the positive kind. But sadly it's not uncommon for goths and similar to get grief. One couple I knew were pelted with flour, resulting in the women having a massive panic attack. Horrible.

I also remember the case of Sophie Lancaster. Her mum has done a lot of work campaigning against bullying.

[Andylion]

@BackforGood

Depends what you mean by judge? People express themselves via their clothing, so I expect people want to be judged by what they wear. Otherwise they would wear something different. Judging isn’t a negative.

This ^ and

Everyone judges everyone. You want to make a certain impression, or you wouldn't do it.

This ^

I don't know what the Corrie reference is, but we all make judgements when we see anyone. 'Judging' is 'making an assessment of', not criticising or being negative.
Someone said upthread they would "prefer to see “alternative” dress and self expression than all the tanned, hd eyebrowed, heavily contoured and drag queen lips on girls these days." - but surely that is a judgement on the orange faced / over eye-browed clan ?

People who dress to stand out from the crowd know they will attract looks and that people will notice them and often comment, and they have still made a choice to do so. That's great, and takes a lot of self-confidence, which I admire.
But we all make assessments about people to some extent due to the way they present themselves, and that isn't a bad thing unless you choose to make it into some sort of a barrier.

Excellent post.

[WhatWouldPhyllisCraneDo]

@CirclesWithinCircles

I quite like individuality. Goths generally look good to me. I remember seeing something on tv about a young guy who dressed in self-designed and tailored Regency dress, and he looked incredible.

He's amazing! I follow him on Instagram, and DS2 wants to be him

I think we all judge people (not every person all the time, but momentarily) for how they dress, but not necessarily negatively. Or at least not always. Judgement is natural human behaviour and isn't always a bad thing.

[Harriedharriet]

I really like it - adds visual interest to the day!

[TomPinch]

@getyourfreakon

As per the thread title.
Yes, Coronation Street has highlighted the issue. I'm what would be referred to as a "goth". I'm also a mother of one.
What are your feelings on the subject?

I would certainly judge you.

Very favourably .

If you were out and about in a onesie, not so much.

[Subordinateclause]

Only on a hot day if they haven't adapted their outfit at all to the weather. I do think people look a bit silly on a properly hot sunny day wearing a black hoody and big black boots, in the same way as I think people look silly wearing a crop top on a snowy day. It can't be comfortable.

[memberofthewedding]

I live in a very diverse area so I am used to seeing people (particularly woman) wearing a variety of clothes, including niqab.

[TomPinch]

The only problem with goths is that there aren't more of them. They look ace.

[NigelWithTheBrie79]

It took me 42 long years to finally be at peace with my style. I sometimes dress like a big fat toddler as I currently love to wear pinafore dresses with bright tights.

[maddiemookins16mum]

You’re all such saints! I am guilty of judging a lady I used to work with who was a goth, she was fast approaching 40 and frankly looked ridiculous.

[whatswithtodaytoday]

I love it. I've always hung out with the 'alternative' crowd in rock pubs because that's the kind of music I like. I was a teenage goth, I love the look and while I dress practically for everyday now, my 'going out' clothes tend to be more gothy. I love a floor-length swishy coat and lots of eyeliner. I've definitely lost my confidence a bit though, as I've aged and got fatter.

For those who don't quite get it - I don't think anyone dresses that was because they think it makes them look different (unless they're 15, perhaps). They do it because they like the look.

[Waxonwaxoff0]

I'm not a goth but I do dress a bit oddly - I like dungarees, big bright Dr Martens, etc. A bit Phoebe from Friends.

I don't judge anyone. I don't get why being a goth is "alternative" to be honest as there's loads of goths and they all dress similar! It's just another type of fashion.