Page 5 | To give a stranger £20

Crystal90567 · 01/05/2021 21:20

I've posted on here before on a kindness of strangers thread. One of the best things I ever did was give £10 to a young man on a (empty) motorbike who was desperate in a petrol station and miles from home. People had been shunning him for about an hour and he was stranded, no charge in phone and miles from home. I feel very warm about it.

I often have no charge in my phone and like to think if I was ever in terrible need the kindness if strangers would come to the rescue.
Maybe not from those on this thread !

osbertthesyrianhamster · 01/05/2021 21:21

@Singlenotsingle

I'd have given him the money. It was only £20 after all. I hope you didn't give him your address?

That's a lot of money to many.

I don't carry cash so he'd have been shit out of luck with me.

But well, lesson learned now. It's a scam.

Trolleywool · 01/05/2021 21:22

But he's got enough to buy himself a bag of heroin, so he'll be happy for a short time, assuming he doesn't accidentally kill himself with the purchase he made after scamming you.

In the unlikely event this is what he is buying, £20 isn't going to be enough to accidentally overdose ffs.

OP I'd also say scam, and you probably were approached as you are a women on your own, and he was counting on you giving it to him even if you didn't believe him. I have done the same, I was on the underground and just me and this bloke on the carriage I was in, he asked for some money and I knew what he was saying was a load of crap but I gave it to him so he would leave me alone. I don't think it would be harmful to report on the non emergency police line so they can build a picture of whether this happens regularly. You say you can afford the £20, some probably will really miss it but still give it to them.

KFleming · 01/05/2021 21:23

Probably a con. A woman once approached me with some story (I’ve forgotten the details) and I told her I had no cash, which was true.
She approached me again a couple of months later. When I told her she’d already asked me for money before, she turned and legged it.

Ruminating2020 · 01/05/2021 21:23

@alliejay81

I was leaving the supermarket 30 minutes ago when I was approached by a man. He told me he had been following his Dad - who was in an ambulance having had a heart attack - when he ran out of petrol. We went round the houses a bit, the story didn't entirely make sense, but it became clear he didn't have any cash or cards on him. He then started asking where I lived before asking if he could borrow some cash. In the end, I gave him £20, for two reasons: 1) if he was genuine (and I wasn't convinced he was) then I'd helped him out 2) he was quite a big burly bloke and the car park was quiet and I felt a little intimidated

I came home and DH and his mate (in the garden, covid compliant) think I was definitely conned and should phone the non-emergency police line.

Was I being unreasonable to give him £20 and would I be unreasonable not to call the non-emergency police line (I just want to move on)?

Sorry op but you were definitely conned. I had this a couple of times back in my early 20s when I was living in a university city.

Like this person's story, he was in dire straits and needed "help". They tell these stories to exploit your empathy and put pressure on you to act the way they want you too.

We live and learn.

Trolleywool · 01/05/2021 21:23

Also if anyone is genuinely out of petrol, you can get petrol and leave your details with the service station and you have a certain amount of time to make the payment.

osbertthesyrianhamster · 01/05/2021 21:24

@Crystal90567

I've posted on here before on a kindness of strangers thread. One of the best things I ever did was give £10 to a young man on a (empty) motorbike who was desperate in a petrol station and miles from home. People had been shunning him for about an hour and he was stranded, no charge in phone and miles from home. I feel very warm about it.

I often have no charge in my phone and like to think if I was ever in terrible need the kindness if strangers would come to the rescue.
Maybe not from those on this thread !

What if you have no money? Or can't afford to give money? It's a petrol garage, wouldn't you think to ask someone for a charge to look up your contacts?

Terminallysleepdeprived · 01/05/2021 21:25

It probably was a scam, but I would have done the same op, i wouldn't be able to live with myself if he was genuine.

osbertthesyrianhamster · 01/05/2021 21:26

@Trolleywool

Also if anyone is genuinely out of petrol, you can get petrol and leave your details with the service station and you have a certain amount of time to make the payment.

That, too. Or say, hey, fuel up a fiver worth of petrol (goes a way in a motorbike) and I'll pay for it and you can get on your way.

osbertthesyrianhamster · 01/05/2021 21:27

@Terminallysleepdeprived

It probably was a scam, but I would have done the same op, i wouldn't be able to live with myself if he was genuine.

God, imagine if you were poor and didn't have any spare cash

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 01/05/2021 21:31

OP I'd also say scam, and you probably were approached as you are a women on your own, and he was counting on you giving it to him even if you didn't believe him.

Female scammers often deliberately target men - maybe hoping he'll take pity on the 'damsel in distress' and/or be less likely to try to empathise and stick around, engaging with them than another woman might and just hand over the money and be away.

itsnotmeitsu · 01/05/2021 21:32

I think sometimes we're more prone to this stuff if we're going through emotional problems ourselves. If you're able to help with money you do it, because you empathise. Of course, that makes it even more disgusting if it's a scam.

HOkieCOkie · 01/05/2021 21:34

That’s a known scam, this guy where I live is always walking around with a bleeding head. He’s been bleeding and needing help for about 6/7 years.

saraclara · 01/05/2021 21:37

It was only £20 after all.

Only £20? Are you serious?

MrsJBaptiste · 01/05/2021 21:38

You may have been conned, you may have allowed him to buy another bag of heroin or it may have been a true story. Who cares?

You did what you thought was right.

I've given money to homeless people who probably spent it on drugs. Doesn't matter to me, if I was homeless I'd probably do the same.

PumpkinPiloter · 01/05/2021 21:40

Don't beat yourself about it but next time don't stop. Keep moving and look straight ahead.

Alcemeg · 01/05/2021 21:40

@HOkieCOkie

That’s a known scam, this guy where I live is always walking around with a bleeding head. He’s been bleeding and needing help for about 6/7 years.

Whenever I think my job is shit, I just need to remind myself there are more painful ways of making a living.

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 01/05/2021 21:42

this guy where I live is always walking around with a bleeding head. He’s been bleeding and needing help for about 6/7 years.

It's always interesting to see the look on their face when you remind them that they approached you with the exact same very specific and unusual emergency circumstances three years earlier - especially if you challenge them loudly in a large group of potential marks....

ApplyWithin · 01/05/2021 21:44

100% scammer. So long as the money doesn’t leave you short, you have no option but to chalk it up as an error and learn from it.

Where I used to live there was a man who told a version of this story but instead of a sick father it was a wife in labour. He would hang around my children’s nursery and try it on every so often with unsuspecting mums picking up their children.

sweetchillidumplings · 01/05/2021 21:45

See, if I desperately needed money for a reason like this (and I have in the past but never had to ask a stranger) I would ask someone with a child as I think they tend to be more willing to listen. If it was urgent that would probably be the first person I saw, man or woman. In the event that my son gets lost I always remind him to find a Mum, with a pram if possible. It just seems safer. I would not accept a lift from a strange man though. So I can kind of see how that one with the husband and son upthread would seem like a scam but also might not be...

PurpleDaisies · 01/05/2021 21:47

So I can kind of see how that one with the husband and son upthread would seem like a scam but also might not be...

Come on.
Of course it’s a scam. There are variations all over the place.

AlwaysLatte · 01/05/2021 21:48

I've given money before in a similar situation. I wasn't 100% certain but I'd rather make the mistake of giving money that wasn't needed than pass someone by who was in trouble. I tend to think that most people are honest.

Monkeytapper · 01/05/2021 21:49

I did similar, £10, totally believable story about losing his bus pass, seemed a really nice genuine lad and I felt good to do a good deed, till I read later on in eve on local Facebook group that he had fleeced about a dozen other people for similar amounts with same story.

SchrodingersImmigrant · 01/05/2021 21:49

I've said it on threads before. I sooooooo want to make a begging thread and the publish how much people offered. Don't want to get banned tho😂

PurpleDaisies · 01/05/2021 21:49

@AlwaysLatte

I've given money before in a similar situation. I wasn't 100% certain but I'd rather make the mistake of giving money that wasn't needed than pass someone by who was in trouble. I tend to think that most people are honest.

You are encouraging scammers to continue scamming innocent people.