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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Do you charge partners “ rent “

147 replies

Troublewaters2021 · 30/04/2021 17:50

Quick question 😂
In this scenario - both work, one owns a house and is selling and buying a new house in their name only.
One who owns house has 2 kids from previous relationship and then there is 1 child from the relationship currently.
Would you charge “ rent “ ?

OP posts:
BerniesMittens · 30/04/2021 17:52

Why is the new house only in one name?

Jumpers268 · 30/04/2021 17:54

Ummm I would charge for their share of the bills but not for the mortgage.

Lollypop701 · 30/04/2021 17:54

Why would new partner agree to rent? If not married there should be a legal way to sort this? If I was paying rent i wouldn’t be happy

Troublewaters2021 · 30/04/2021 17:54

@BerniesMittens because there has been no financial contribution to the current house and that is funding the new house.

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 30/04/2021 17:55

Surely a couple living together with a child would just sort out a household budget and contribute to the one pot?

Troublewaters2021 · 30/04/2021 17:55

Current no rent is being paid and there was no talk about it etc just curious as someone asked why they wasn’t paying rent / living costs.

OP posts:
Miniwinnie · 30/04/2021 17:56

Maybe not half of the mortgage payments but they would certainly need to pay their way.

VegCheeseandCrackers · 30/04/2021 17:56

I wouldn't as it feels too house matey but do what works for you.

Troublewaters2021 · 30/04/2021 17:56

There is no mortgage payments.
So wouldn’t be towards the mortgage as such.

OP posts:
BigFatLiar · 30/04/2021 17:57

This makes him sound like a lodger.

MangoBiscuit · 30/04/2021 17:57

I own my house in my sole name, and have 2 kids from previous relationship. My DP has moved in with us, and he pays me a set amount of money to cover bills tec. It's technically not rent, nor is it paying my mortgage. But he gets to live here rent-free, and my bills went up when he moved in. So we agreed an amount that was fair, so we're both better off and able to increase our savings, and he pays that. However, we both earn similar-ish amounts. I earn a little more, but the difference is taken in outgoings for my DC. So it all feels very fair. He's also paying a lot less than when he rented elsewhere. hth

WorraLiberty · 30/04/2021 17:58

@Troublewaters2021

Current no rent is being paid and there was no talk about it etc just curious as someone asked why they wasn’t paying rent / living costs.
Hold on, living costs are a different thing entirely.

Are they contributing at all to the household?

SleepingStandingUp · 30/04/2021 18:00

So Homeowner is selling house A and buying house B with no mortgage on it? No, I wouldn't charge rent. I'd find it quite odd for my PARTNER and COPARENT to charge me for living in a house they aren't actually paying for

How is the rest of finance split?

Troublewaters2021 · 30/04/2021 18:00

He does a food shop etc
But there is no set contribution so thinking about asking for 500.00 a month ?

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 30/04/2021 18:01

@Troublewaters2021

He does a food shop etc But there is no set contribution so thinking about asking for 500.00 a month ?
What is the 'etc' that he pays?
BrilliantBetty · 30/04/2021 18:02

How are bills, shopping, other household expenditures divided?

Troublewaters2021 · 30/04/2021 18:02

At the moment

I will be paying for the house and if it stayed then as currently, I pay all bills.

And we do 2 big food shops a month one of which he pays for and one I pay for.

OP posts:
HairyPits · 30/04/2021 18:02

My lord! Reading these threads makes me so grateful for my relationship. Charging rent to the parent of your child who you live with!!!! What would happen to the ‘rent’ money?

SleepingStandingUp · 30/04/2021 18:02

@Troublewaters2021

He does a food shop etc But there is no set contribution so thinking about asking for 500.00 a month ?
So you're paying for the utilities, all three children's costs, most of the food, insurance and repairs?

What do you both earn? Why is your money for the house and his money his?

What is the total cost of utilities, contents insurance, food etc?

I'd expect him to pay half. As a concession if he doesn't want to support YOUR children I'd consider deducting child support value from the total bill cost and splitting that.

Troublewaters2021 · 30/04/2021 18:03

@HairyPits I haven’t said I would charge him it was a conversation that came up. I have not charged him a penny since he moved in.

OP posts:
mrsbitaly · 30/04/2021 18:03

If you are in a relationship and there is no mortgage repayment then no I wouldn't charge rent. For all other bills yes.

SleepingStandingUp · 30/04/2021 18:03

@HairyPits

My lord! Reading these threads makes me so grateful for my relationship. Charging rent to the parent of your child who you live with!!!! What would happen to the ‘rent’ money?
Go towards the utilities he uses as he currently pays for nothing but one shop a month??
DinosaurDiana · 30/04/2021 18:04

I would expect to pay bills 50:50. But not pay for mortgage.

Jumpers268 · 30/04/2021 18:04

£500 a month for what? Half gas & electric, council tax, water and broadband? He pays for half the food already. £500?

SleepingStandingUp · 30/04/2021 18:04

I find it odd that he's your child's father but he sees no need to contribute to her upkeep