To ask how do I deal with an "annoying" work colleague?

[Vindicated2021]

I'm her line manager.

There is nothing wrong with work. It's her personality. I've had various members of my team "complain" about her and that she needs to be told. I eventually turned round to one today and said "What do you want me to say? You've got a shit personality, change it?!"

A few things:

She shouts loudly when on the phone.

Over enunciates every single word.

Repeats herself endlessly.

Talks to herself constantly.

We mentioned a saying that a colleague (who has sadly passed away) used and now tries to put it into every single sentence.

She broke down in tears when another colleague announced they had the all clear from cancer (she has known him 2 months tops) and said "good things happen to good people" (despite her knowing full well my FIL is stage 4 terminal - my issue).

Laughs at the most stupidest things (today she dropped a piece of paper - the most hilarious thing ever apparently)

These are just a few things. I've mentioned in her one to ones that she needs to reign it in a little as she can be a bit "over excited" at times, but she just doesn't stop!!

I'm at the end of my tether. I just don't know what to do with her!!

We are moving offices in a short while which will require some moving about. As of today I have had 5 requests asking not to be sat on the same bank of desks as her.....There's only so many seats so some are going to be VERY disappointed!

Any advice???

Even if the person brays constantly like a hyena in heat?

Yes, actually. And even if they have an issue with it, the first thing they should do is go to the person in question and say, 'Excuse me, sorry to disturb you, but do you think you could try to refrain from laughing so much? Only it's making it quite difficult for me to focus.'

I wonder when we became incapable as a nation of actually talking to people, rather than about them.

There are some things which you can legitimately address with her directly as they affect other people's ability to work effectively (talking too loudly / too much).

Otherwise the problem really is with everyone else, which I think you have identified.

It sounds like she's trying desperately hard to fit in.

Honestly I’m wondering whether she suffers with anxiety made worse by knowing people are bitching. The constant chatter maybe because she feels a need to fill the silence.

You can address the loud talking on the phone as “it’s come to my attention that other colleagues find it difficult to make calls and concentrate when you are on the phone due to how loudly you speak, whilst you are doing a great job could you speak a little quieter please?”

Concentrate on things you can Change. She’s clearly open to it as you mentioned about her having conversations across the office which you bought up and she has now stopped.

If I were you OP I would go back to the drawing board (start again) with the lot of them. You can include yourself in this too...
Set out expectations:

1. Quiet, professional working atmosphere at all times.
2. Refrain from disturbing others unnecessarily
3. Ensure chat and catch ups take place during break times.
4. Suggest noise blocking headphones for anyone who finds that they get disturbed by day to day noise (keyboards tapping etc.)

You need to manage your team.

Can you offer the colleague a referral to Occupational health?? They could be a useful third party for issues like potential hearing loss and interpersonal issues they may have and possible neurodiversity. This would illustrate your managerial duty of care too...

5. Be respectful of those around you.
6. use a Quiet, professional telephone manner

I'd be stopping people talking about her in the manner they are. It sounds like bullying, and that they are picking on her.

How someone conducts themselves in the workplace isn't about their personality, it's about their professionalism. She might have an annoying personality, but she is displaying a range of behaviours that are hindering everyone's ability to work.

Have your colleagues actually told her to keep the noise down? If they haven't and they've come straight to you then I think they need to grow up. If they have then I understand why you need to step in.

You need to speak to loud person and tell them that their current noise level in the office is affecting everyone's ability to work, so they need to keep it down and be considerate. You might also want to offer them a separate room for phonecalls if the person has a genuine hearing condition that might affect their volume.

Regarding colleagues moaning they don't want to sit near her, they sound worse than Year 9s who know there's a new seating plan. You can't allocate office desks based on who people like/don't like. You're making a rod for your own back if you do.

@PaulaTrilloe

Can you offer the colleague a referral to Occupational health?? They could be a useful third party for issues like potential hearing loss and interpersonal issues they may have and possible neurodiversity. This would illustrate your managerial duty of care too...

You can't refer someone to OH just because they annoy everyone.

You sound like a bit of a bully sorry. You shouldn't be talking about one of your staff like that with the others.

I've been there. I was the manager of the manager and had to step in as it was really tough for him to navigate.

In our case her work wasn't good so we managed her out after 2 years but we did resolve some of the interpersonal challenges in that time.

What worked was to make it non judgemental. It's not about being 'annoying' it's about not reading the room well enough and recognising how your behaviour comes across and impacts others. You've given some specific examples, more would be helpful. Make it about how it impacted others. It's about the disruption not 'annoying' them.

Make it clear you aren't trying to change who she is, there should be space in the team for someone a bit more lively and extrovert. It's about helping her learn to flex her style and know when to bring out her superpower (lightening things up) and when to reign it in.

If you can help her learn to adjust like this it's a really useful skill that will help her loads so you are doing her a favour. Try to approach it with that mindset rather than feel like your being asked to be horrible.

However I would think about how much you and the team value diversity. Diversity of background, thinking style, neurodiversity, are all positives in a team and should be nurtured. Maybe also work with the team to be more inclusive and not expect everyone to be cookie cutter culturally.

@Trolleywool

What a toxic environment you have curated, I feel sorry for her. Allowing and getting involved in bitching about her, pathetic loss of control in saying that about her to your colleague. What you should have done is addressed the concerns which affect work by talking to her, even if the conversation is difficult; and the aspects like what she finds funny not facilitate your team to bitch about it, it's cruel. She probably feels left out and is trying too hard to fit in.

This

Can't you get her to work from home?? 🤣

Get rid of them at end of probation period

Not a good fit for the team, you'll potentially hemorrhage other members of staff.

To be honest , saying what you said to someone who complained about her is equally unprofessional. You need to concentrate on her behaviour and be able to have some sort of sanction up your sleeve if things don't improve.
The loudness would be a good place to start.

@ChristmasAlone

Get rid of them at end of probation period

Not a good fit for the team, you'll potentially hemorrhage other members of staff.

The poor woman would probably be relieved

I don't think there's much you can do to be honest. She can't change her personality. I think promoting tolerance and also having some rules about working quietly...