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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU for having the one drink?

199 replies

AIBU6006 · 22/04/2021 20:11

Name changed for this post.

I was asked by the DM of my sons best friend if I could pick up her DD and watch her for 30 minutes after school as she had been offered an appointment for her first covid vaccination and she didn't want to cancel and rebook the appointment as she'd have to wait 5 weeks for the next available appointment. I told her no problem. (DS and his best friend are 10yo)

The DM is a single parent and pretty much doesn't have any support so I decided to offer for her DD to stay over for longer and have dinner with us and I'd take her back home at around 6.30pm so the DM could have a break. The DM said yes please so that was the plan.

I have another DS who's 8 and the 3 of them were playing video games in the living room so I decided to go and read in the garden so I wasn't hovering around them. I could see and hear them from where I was sitting in the garden.

We all had pizza in the garden together and played a board game and then they went back in to continue playing.

I had 1 bottle of kopparberg in the fridge left over from the weekend so decided to treat myself and have it while sat out reading in the sun after they went back indoors.

My Dsis came into the garden to pick up couple of my deck chairs I said I would lend to her for the coming weekend and she noticed I was having a drink and began chastising me and was shocked that I was consuming alcohol while I was looking after someone else's child and said if she was the mother of the best friend she would have been appalled that I was under the influence of alcohol while caring for her child.

I don't drink often and only have a couple here and there and was only planning on having that one cider. I had only had a third of the drink at this point and I ended up pouring the rest down the sink because she'd made me feel absolutely guilty and ashamed. I honestly didn't see the problem with it to start with but now I'm wondering if I'd been completely irresponsible and I feel terrible! Was it something stupid to do?

OP posts:
GrumpyHoonMain · 23/04/2021 18:27

I personally wouldn’t but that’s because my choice of tipple is a triple shot g&t. I only have one but I make it count lol

Fembot123 · 23/04/2021 18:34

@iklboo

Slurring after half a cider? Give over.
It was sarcasm, have you read the thread 🤦🏼‍♀️
Fembot123 · 23/04/2021 18:35

@fellrunner85

What the actual fuck is up with some of you lot?!

I'm teetotal but even I can see that one Koppaberg is fine, and normal, and well within any sort of tolerance level.

I'm also Hmm at this mythical hospital situation where the doctors call social services if they suspect even a smidgen of fruit cider has been consumed.

It was saaaaarcasm
sylv165 · 23/04/2021 18:45

I'm the sole adult in the house, looking after (my own) 2 children. I've had a glass of wine with dinner and am definitely NOT panicking about one of them having an accident and the doctor calling social services 🤣

iklboo · 23/04/2021 18:50

@Fembot123 - yes, sorry. Caught that after i posted 😂. Must have been the sniff of cooking sherry I had on Tuesday clouding my judgement.

BrumBoo · 23/04/2021 18:56

I wouldn't judge a parent having one drink whilst in charge of kids. Worse happen at BBQs and such. However, those ciders leave people stinking even after a few glugs. If I smelled it on someone dropping off my child, I'm not sure how impressed I'd be in perfect honesty. I can't know for sure if it was one or more but I'd certainly be wondering.

Fembot123 · 23/04/2021 19:07

[quote iklboo]@Fembot123 - yes, sorry. Caught that after i posted 😂. Must have been the sniff of cooking sherry I had on Tuesday clouding my judgement. [/quote]
Well the first step is admitting you have a problem 😄

LesserBother · 23/04/2021 19:08

Koppaberg and other similar things are dangerous because whilst tasting like Ribena one bottle (bottles are 500ml, pear is 4.5%) is over 2 units, so equivalent to 2 glasses of wine or a pint of beer, it's certainly not comparable to schloer!

I wouldn't drink a bottle whilst looking after someone else's kids unless they knew and were comfortable with it, different with your own.

Fembot123 · 23/04/2021 19:08

@BrumBoo

I wouldn't judge a parent having one drink whilst in charge of kids. Worse happen at BBQs and such. However, those ciders leave people stinking even after a few glugs. If I smelled it on someone dropping off my child, I'm not sure how impressed I'd be in perfect honesty. I can't know for sure if it was one or more but I'd certainly be wondering.
Do they? I don’t actually know anyone who drinks them but really?
Fembot123 · 23/04/2021 19:09

@LesserBother

Koppaberg and other similar things are dangerous because whilst tasting like Ribena one bottle (bottles are 500ml, pear is 4.5%) is over 2 units, so equivalent to 2 glasses of wine or a pint of beer, it's certainly not comparable to schloer!

I wouldn't drink a bottle whilst looking after someone else's kids unless they knew and were comfortable with it, different with your own.

But wine is 12% +
mightbealittlebitmad · 23/04/2021 19:14

I think it's fine but I had a glass of prosecco at 12pm and still managed to do a gym session and pick up my children from school and nursery, do a food shop and get home in one piece.

LesserBother · 23/04/2021 19:14

But wine is 12% +

Your point is? If you don't understand that total alcohol consumption depends on both strength and volume then I probably wouldn't trust your judgement on a safe amount to drink

BasiliskStare · 23/04/2021 19:18

I wonder if the answer is just don't ask a favour of someone who might have the temerity to have half a glass of cider when the sun is hovering under the yard arm - or do but just ignore everyone else's opinion Grin

Fembot123 · 23/04/2021 19:23

@LesserBother

But wine is 12% +

Your point is? If you don't understand that total alcohol consumption depends on both strength and volume then I probably wouldn't trust your judgement on a safe amount to drink

Just as well I don’t give a flying fuck what you think. If I had 2 glasses of wine I’d be more impaired than if I’d had one Koppaberg. It’s impairment that is in question here not ability to drive and if you don’t understand that then you haven’t read the thread 😂
Fembot123 · 23/04/2021 19:25

@BasiliskStare

I wonder if the answer is just don't ask a favour of someone who might have the temerity to have half a glass of cider when the sun is hovering under the yard arm - or do but just ignore everyone else's opinion Grin
Exactly! Lucky OP having an extra child to look after, she won’t be allowed again since she’s a piss head
ButtonMoony · 23/04/2021 19:49

@Fembot123

What on earth are you talking about? Two glasses of wine is significantly more alcohol than a bottle of weak cider?

BrumBoo · 23/04/2021 19:49

@Fembot123 my husband has a preference for them, and I've found cider to be the smelliest of drinks on other people, followed by beer. I think it's the mixture of the overly sweet mixing with the cider base, and it becomes this sickly perfume type smell. It may just be me, but I can certainly smell it on people and used to hate sitting near cider drinkers in pubs. I dont actually mind the taste so much, some are very easy to drink as previous posters have said. I'd rather a wine though Grin.

LesserBother · 23/04/2021 19:55

Two glasses of wine is significantly more alcohol than a bottle of weak cider?

If you only get 3 glasses of wine out a bottle then yes, but if you're talking about pub servings then 2.3 units in koppaberg pear cider v 2.8 ish in 2 small glasses of wine.

Fembot123 · 23/04/2021 19:57

[quote ButtonMoony]@Fembot123

What on earth are you talking about? Two glasses of wine is significantly more alcohol than a bottle of weak cider?[/quote]
Er my point precisely 😂🤦🏼‍♀️

Fembot123 · 23/04/2021 19:58

[quote BrumBoo]@Fembot123 my husband has a preference for them, and I've found cider to be the smelliest of drinks on other people, followed by beer. I think it's the mixture of the overly sweet mixing with the cider base, and it becomes this sickly perfume type smell. It may just be me, but I can certainly smell it on people and used to hate sitting near cider drinkers in pubs. I dont actually mind the taste so much, some are very easy to drink as previous posters have said. I'd rather a wine though Grin.[/quote]
Real cider drinkers would be horrified to have Koppaberg compared to it, it really is an alcopop and shouldn’t really bear the name cider.

BrumBoo · 23/04/2021 20:04

Real cider drinkers would be horrified to have Koppaberg compared to it, it really is an alcopop and shouldn’t really bear the name cider.

Well Koppaberg and such is the cider in question here and those are the ones that smell like cheap knock-off perfumes sold in Poundland. I can only answer on the information given, and if I smelled a fruity cider on a parent dropping off my child, I would be wondering exactly how much they were drinking with kids in their care.

Fembot123 · 23/04/2021 20:05

@BrumBoo

Real cider drinkers would be horrified to have Koppaberg compared to it, it really is an alcopop and shouldn’t really bear the name cider.

Well Koppaberg and such is the cider in question here and those are the ones that smell like cheap knock-off perfumes sold in Poundland. I can only answer on the information given, and if I smelled a fruity cider on a parent dropping off my child, I would be wondering exactly how much they were drinking with kids in their care.

Ok 👌
HollywoodTease · 23/04/2021 20:15

I'd probably have asked the friend's DM if she wanted to join me in the garden for a drink when she came to pick her child up.

Your sister is a twat.

SaturdayRocks · 23/04/2021 20:33

Oh my goodness, the ridiculous flapping, both by your sister, and some on this thread.

My friend M took her DD, my DD and mutual friend K’s DD away over night for three nights this week while it’s the school hols. Both K and I (unbeknownst to each other, until M later thanked us in a group text) gave her a bottle of her favourite red, along with a few treats for the girls, to take with her.

I am absolutely assuming that during the evening she will have had a glass or two, while in charge of the girls.

They all returned home safely, and the sky didn’t fall on anyone’s head.

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