My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

AIBU?

To think thst this is too early a bedtime for a 3.7 yo?

218 replies

Bbq1 · 11/04/2021 18:34

I know somebody who is putting their 3.7 yr old to bed at 6pm. Child is waking at 5am. I'm not surprised as my own ds went to bed around 6.45 at almost 4. Aibu to think this is a very early bedtime and the likely cause of the early waking?

OP posts:
Report
Tomyoneandonly · 12/04/2021 09:41

No really to early. Most pp has said their dcs went to bed at this time. We had a bed time routine when all dcs was in bed at about 6.30. 7.30 ish all my dcs was under the age of 5. So no each to their own. Its hard to rearrange a new set time for a toddler.

Report
Jumpers268 · 12/04/2021 09:44

Yeah he's definitely not running about at 5am. Very aware of the neighbours and knows it's quiet until at least 7/8am when the normal people start waking up 😉.

Report
Looneytune253 · 12/04/2021 09:45

A friend of mines children were early risers whatever tome they went to bed. She tended to put them to bed early as they'd wake up at 5am regardless so she might aswell have some time

Report
BigPaperBag · 12/04/2021 09:46

My DS went to bed at 6pm until he was about 5. It was basically because he and I were both exhausted after him getting up at 4.30am everyday!

Report
ElsasFrozenVerucca · 12/04/2021 09:53

The only thing that has helped my early risers is the clock change recently and that they are going to bed a bit later. Now that I am trying to get bedtime earlier again, I'm sure the mornings will get earlier again.

Report
blowinahoolie · 12/04/2021 10:21

@thebillyotea

Blimey, if we didn't have to leave the house before 8am, my kids wouldn't be up until 7:30!

I have speech and language exercises to do with one of the DC just after 7am (impossible to do after nursery as he is too tired, in nursery 9 til 3) like the kitchen tidy before I leave the house and have packed lunches to put into bags etc. Loads to do before 8am.

Yep Caspianberg it is too dark for many months of the year at 5am, but doesn't stop young children waking up naturally at this time 🤷
Report
blowinahoolie · 12/04/2021 10:26

"Again, if parents are happier that way, it's entirely up to them, no one cares, it just sounds like making your life so much harder!"

Not really, I am an early riser anyway myself so this suits me. I want to have down time each evening to do what I please. Making my life hard would be having children still up and about at these ages into 8/9pm. No thanks!

Report
blowinahoolie · 12/04/2021 10:31

Naturally as children get older they sleep in later and it's not an issue. This is gradual as they start school and get exhausted without my help! The first five/six years are tough.

Report
blowinahoolie · 12/04/2021 10:33

My older children go to bed around 10pm, and wake around 7am on school days and any time they want on other days.

We might be up early around 5/6am most days with the youngest children but we watch TV quietly or play with toys etc. I don't use a Hoover until 9am. Dishwasher often switched on at 6am though. Washing machine the same.

Report
honeylulu · 12/04/2021 10:41

Yes it seems very early to me (both the bedtime and the rising). I know people say if they put their kids to bed late they wake at the same time but it can take 3-4 days to get into new "habits". When we go on holiday we let our kids stay up and go to bed really late (10.30/11pm) and after a couple of days waking at their "normal" time they are having a nice late lie in.

Report
midnightstar66 · 12/04/2021 10:42

It would have been exceptionally early for my dc but then so would 6.45. If they'd have gone down at that time it would have been a nap and I doubt moving 45 minutes will make much of a difference. My niece and nephew went to bed at 6pm for years though, even when they were at school. Every child is different. Some will wake at 5 regardless.

Report
timeforanewnameagain · 12/04/2021 10:45

@thebillyotea

Newsflash, all children are different!

They are, but they all live in the same society with the same rules about noise, with the same daylight, with the same opening hours and so on.

If your toddler wakes up at 5, and nothing opens until 10am (or 9am rarely), that's an awful amount of hours to fill in and keeping them quiet indoors.

Meanwhile that's a lot of hours wasted in the afternoon and evening when you have to rush home early, have diner in the middle of the afternoon and put them in their bedroom so early.

Again, if parents are happier that way, it's entirely up to them, no one cares, it just sounds like making your life so much harder!

And unlike MN where parents are home by 4 or 5, and the entire family can have tea at 5, most people are working and the kids at school, clubs or nursery at this time!

It makes my life far, far easier!

DH and I have the entire evening to ourselves to do as we please every single night. We eat in peace, have time to do our hobbies without it impacting time with the children, spend time together being a couple not just mum and dad. It's great. I'm a sahm so I spend all of my time with them during the day, by 6:30pm I'm more than ready for some peace Grin

It inconveniences me very occasionally. I couldn't, for example, take my children out for a meal at 7pm. They'd already be in bed and if i tried to keep them up they'd be miserable nightmares. But to be honest, at 2 and 5 years old if I was going out in the evening I'd rather leave them asleep in bed with a babysitter and go with DH anyway.

And no, whoever asked, I don't bath them every night!

Why can't people see that what works for them isn't the same for everyone? I wouldn't like it if my children at their ages were still up at 8pm + I don't think that's an appropriate bedtime for them. Doesn't mean it's not ok for other people's children or their parents though.
Report
blowinahoolie · 12/04/2021 10:59

"DH and I have the entire evening to ourselves to do as we please every single night. We eat in peace, have time to do our hobbies without it impacting time with the children, spend time together being a couple not just mum and dad. It's great. I'm a sahm so I spend all of my time with them during the day, by 6:30pm I'm more than ready for some peace grin"

🙌 Totally agree with you.

Report
WitchesBritchesPumpkinPants · 12/04/2021 11:02

@Bbq1

Oh well, never mind. It's many years since my ds was 3 so, in an attempt to help someone close and their lo who I care about a great deal, I thought I would see what an average bedtime is for a 3 year is. However, I have repeatedly been nastily told it's none of my business when I just wanted to have an idea of an average time to offer them some advice and support. Oh well.
Thanks for the posters who genuinely offered helpful advice.

If that's what you wanted to know, then asking that might have been helpful

Your OP was a judgefest. Own it.
Report
Rukaya · 12/04/2021 11:04

What in the world is a 3.7 year old?

How are so many people so confused by a simple number? FFS, 3 whole years and point 7 of a year. Closer to 4 than 3.

How do you people get through the day without assistance?

(and people putting their kids to bed at 6pm are usually doing it for their own needs not the childrens. It's insanity and peculiarly British)

Report
dotdashdashdash · 12/04/2021 11:06

@honeylulu

Yes it seems very early to me (both the bedtime and the rising). I know people say if they put their kids to bed late they wake at the same time but it can take 3-4 days to get into new "habits". When we go on holiday we let our kids stay up and go to bed really late (10.30/11pm) and after a couple of days waking at their "normal" time they are having a nice late lie in.

But not all kids.

Late bedtime = early risers for mine.

On holiday we usually just put up with it, and accept that if we want to go out for a late dinner or drinks etc that we'll have a very (4am) early get up, but we take it in turns and use it to make the most of our day. By the end of the holiday eldest is on his knees and grumpy as fuck but still won't sleep past 6am, and would rarely nap in the day. We just get back in to his normal rhythm once we are at home. The youngest is a different kettle of fish, 10 pm bedtime means a later wake up for her, as long as her brother doesn't wake her.
Report
midnightstar66 · 12/04/2021 11:07

How are so many people so confused by a simple number? FFS, 3 whole years and point 7 of a year. Closer to 4 than 3.

Except that's not what she meant. She meant 3 years and 7 months - so only a smidge over 3 and a half. Not 3 point 7. That's why people asked to clarify, or whether it was a bit of a typo for 3&7 which was also possible

Report
Rukaya · 12/04/2021 11:17

The fact that OP was equally confused about what 3.7 means does not take away from my point, it merely enhances it!

Report
dotdashdashdash · 12/04/2021 11:18

@thebillyotea

Newsflash, all children are different!

They are, but they all live in the same society with the same rules about noise, with the same daylight, with the same opening hours and so on.

If your toddler wakes up at 5, and nothing opens until 10am (or 9am rarely), that's an awful amount of hours to fill in and keeping them quiet indoors.

Meanwhile that's a lot of hours wasted in the afternoon and evening when you have to rush home early, have diner in the middle of the afternoon and put them in their bedroom so early.

Again, if parents are happier that way, it's entirely up to them, no one cares, it just sounds like making your life so much harder!

And unlike MN where parents are home by 4 or 5, and the entire family can have tea at 5, most people are working and the kids at school, clubs or nursery at this time!

Yes, I often didn't collect DS form nursery until 5.45 - we'd drive home, he'd have supper (dinner was given at nursery) and we he would go to bed, if he hadn't fallen asleep on the way home that is. So no, I wouldn't get to spend much time with him in the evening. But if I wanted to, he would be grumpy as hell so it wasn't any fun as he was tired, and then he'd sleep badly and be even grumpier the next day.

But, on the flip side, I did get to spend time with him in the mornings. We'd often play before breakfast and getting dressed, then play some more before leaving the house at 7.30 to get to nursery/ work.

Yes, I would have much preferred to have him sleep 7-7 but after years of absolutely terrible sleep, I would take anything.
Report
midnightstar66 · 12/04/2021 11:22

The fact that OP was equally confused about what 3.7 means does not take away from my point, it merely enhances it

Not really. It was a strange way of expressing it so people wanted to clarify. I for people knew what 3.7 means but thought it was unlikely the op was being so strangely specific and was correct.

Report
Rukaya · 12/04/2021 11:26

IT's not even slightly a strange way of expressing it. And people did not ask OP to clarify, they were crying "What on Earth is a 3.7 year old?" as if counting was some kind of bizarre concept.
Hmm

Report
KoalaOok · 12/04/2021 11:27

Some people have brains that are wired to see 3.7 years as different to a 3 year and 7 month year old.

Report

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

KoalaOok · 12/04/2021 11:28

And seeing as there is only 45 minutes difference in the times in the post the OP could have been being specific

Report
midnightstar66 · 12/04/2021 11:29

Oh shush no one says my child is 3.7 years old meaning 3.84 months. Hmm

Report
doris9034 · 12/04/2021 11:43

When we fostered an incredibly full on 6yo, there were times in the winter when he was in bed at 4.30pm! It was dark, he couldn't tell the time and he needed i needed the downtime!

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.