Symptomatic husband too 'busy' to get a test?!

[lifejusthappenss]

Dh had symptoms come on yesterday, new continuous cough and a fever. He's kept me up all night so far coughing so badly and woke up the baby

I work in a hospital and am well aware as he has symptoms I should self isolate until he has a test. Issue is dh is ridiculous and insists he hasn't got time to self isolate or miss work, he's travelling for conferences this week and has lots to do surely if you're travelling for work it's more important than ever to get a test and not become a super spreader across the UK!! I know he's worried the results won't come back in time but it's the right thing to do

Anyway we've just had an argument over it at 3am!! He said he was going to sleep downstairs so I can get a good sleep for work and I said I won't be going to work in the hospital with you like this until you've you've been tested and he scoffed that there's no chance. So what do I do if he refuses? Besides me thinking he's massively unreasonable putting other people at risk because he's too 'important' I also feel he's putting me in a difficult position at work? I'm not going into a hospital if someone I live with shows symptoms but will have to be off the full 10 days if he doesn't test?

@ismiseeire

Yes, he does rather have the op over a barrel, you're right

[quote beginningoftheend]@ismiseeire

Yes, he does rather have the op over a barrel, you're right [/quote]
Once the dressing gown of doom comes out, Judge Rinder, soup and Lemsip (only medication acceptable to man), he'll be grand and realise the severity of his illness.

Lol, bizarrely, I only accept that I'm admitted to hospital when they force me into the dreaded gown - the arse-on-full-view gown. Up until that item is produced, there's nothing wrong with me in my head and I might rise from the trolley like Lazarus. I have hope until the gown.

Get the dressing gown out OP. Approach him with caution.

People will pick up on his cough and be pissed off at Him .Then if people come down with it they will blame him ( probably will we him that give it to them ).

Everyone will be uncomfortable with someone in the room coughing .Could you get hold of a lateral flow test from work.

As he is obviously more concerned about his repulsion at work than you I would point out to him how unprofessional he will look going in and coughing over everyone else and how bad that could be for business

Tell him if he insists on working and/or not getting tested, you'll self-isolate from him. That is, you won't sleep in the same bed as him, you won't go anywhere near him (if possible), you won't cook, clean or wash his clothes for him, you won't go and shop (do online shopping) etc. Hopefully he'll believe you and do the right thing before you actually have to do any of those things! It's petty, I know, but if he's anything like my partner, it'll piss him off enough to kick him into touch 😷

Can you book both of you a test as you might have it as well? Personally I'd loose all respect for a person like that, he sounds incredibly selfish.

His job is more important than yours. And by extension he is more important than you. That's what he's saying.

Order a test online, you will receive it tomorrow and he can do it at home. Send it back and he will receive the results the next day. I've known people do that, it isn't expensive and will put yours and his minds at rest. He could just have a cough, there are other bugs around. I had an awful one a few weeks ago but it wasn't covid.

I would order a test online. I ordered one last tuesday, it came wednesday and I got the result late thursday. It can take longer but doesn't usually. At least then it won't eat into his precious time. Selfish bastard.

X posted. It doesn't cost anything.

@MrsTerryPratchett
HIS JOB IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN YOURS. AND BY EXTENSION HE IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN YOU. THAT'S WHAT HE'S SAYING

Not at all doubt he would of taken a test if he was single . Not everything is man v woman

Sadly if someone you've had close contact with, is showing symptoms and refusing to get tested the only thing you can do is do the full time. You need to ring your work up and ask for advice.

Pretty selfish of him.

Are you alright walker? What's with the scary full caps weirdness?

What a dick. I would also try pointing out how unprofessional it would look to go to work coughing all.over everyone, he doesn't appear to care what you think but he might care what they think.

I would take a different tack. I would go on about how worried I was about him, how I didn't want him to end up in hospital away from me, how I didn't want to end up a widow.
I find it much more effective with a stubborn man rather than telling him he's selfish.

@MrsTerryPratchett

Can't do bold sorry hope you managed to find your vapours and lacy hanky for the shock those "scary full caps gave you" . Thoughts and prayers to you

Just book you both tests.

[quote rwalker]@MrsTerryPratchett

Can't do bold sorry hope you managed to find your vapours and lacy hanky for the shock those "scary full caps gave you" . Thoughts and prayers to you[/quote]
The quote function just totally bypassed you then?

He's an arse who's totally lacking in any sense of responsibility.

Order an online test and poke that swab up his nose while he sleeps. And do it very hard!

Well, order the test, at least.

He’s been totally unfair on you. He won’t test and says he will continue to go to work meaning you can’t go to work for ten days. Why does he think that’s ok?

He’ll never be allowed on a plane surely? And even if he makes it abroad will he not have to do a lateral flow test at some point to come back? Friend of mine is still flying round the world for work and says he’s always having to do tests.....but not sure if that’s his employer or the airports?

Is he this unreasonable about other aspects of his life, Op?

Ah this makes me so angry. Relatives early in lockdown had symptoms and were still letting workers into their house and going to the local shop run by an elderly couple - I even had to isolate because I initially went to stay with them for the lockdown because they didn't tell me they had symptoms.

It's really selfish of him. I'd tell him how bad it would look to go to a conference coughing - I'd be really angry if someone did that.

Then I'd consider booking him a test and calling his work to let them know he had symptoms and a test booked.

It's one day - better to lose it than to infect everyone and have them off for weeks.

What an arrogant selfish man. So his job is more important than peoples lives. Disgusting. Id report him if he was my husband.

If he's caught going to work/ conferences with symptoms that haven't been tested he is risking his job. My husband's company has fired three people for it! And his sister company several more. Many many companies are taking this very seriously.
He won't be finding himself too busy if he doesn't have a job.