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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Everyone moaning about why lockdown is so hard for them

139 replies

1onway1under12and1over18 · 02/04/2021 20:08

Aibu but does everyone have a reason as to why in their specific circumstance lockdown has been the hardest for them. Be it living alone, living with partner, living with young kids, pregnant, given birth, furloughed, having to work, homeschooling...on & on. Everyone seems to think their particular circumstance is so much harder than the next person. We’ve all suffered, sacrificed, been through hell. Why does your home life/ reason make you more at reason to give up on restrictions / have had enough of it by now than the next person?

OP posts:
LolaSmiles · 02/04/2021 20:10

We're all in the same storm, but we're not all in the same boat.

The sort of person playing the negativity Olympics is likely to have that sort of personality trait outside of lockdown. You know the type, everything in their life is a roller coaster/ whatever situation their friend is experiencing, they'll have it worse /nobody understands how tough things are for them / you wouldn't believe how ill they were from a common cold.

NutellaEllaElla · 02/04/2021 20:10

Some people are just moaners.

I've found parents to be complaining the most. Apparently having to care for own your kids full time is the worst thing ever.

EvilOnion · 02/04/2021 20:10

Everyone has their own breaking point.

Not everyone is mentally able to deal with the load a year on.

PurpleDaisies · 02/04/2021 20:10

Why aren’t people allowed to have had a tough time and talk about that?

Most people aren’t saying they’ve had it worse. They’re talking about how it was for them.

Mum497 · 02/04/2021 20:12

Are you thinking about anyone in particular here? I definitely don't think my circumstances are worse than anyone else's and I know a lot of the people who feel the same as me. I actually feel very grateful in this awful situation as I know so many other people have it a lot worse than I do.

CrazyNeighbour · 02/04/2021 20:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

NothingIsWrong · 02/04/2021 20:12

@NutellaEllaElla

Some people are just moaners.

I've found parents to be complaining the most. Apparently having to care for own your kids full time is the worst thing ever.

More that happy to care for my kids full time. Having to do a relentless stressful full time paid job simultaneously was what broke me a little bit
Echobelly · 02/04/2021 20:12

There are plenty of different reasons for having a tough time and talking about it - I don't think people complaining are necessarily implying they've had it harder than anyone else - as @PurpleDaisies says

Happycat1212 · 02/04/2021 20:13

Yes I must admit it does make me wonder when people complain about living alone whilst others complain about living with someone and how they would rather be alone! You can’t win. Then people complaining about having to look after multiple kids And how hard it is whilst others complaining they only have one so it’s so sad for them lol

Frazzlefrazle · 02/04/2021 20:13

I've haven't witnessed anyone saying they have had it the hardest, just that it's hard for them at that moment in time. Everyone's needs to let it out to be able clear their heads. Lend an ear and tell them it'll get better.

ComDummings · 02/04/2021 20:13

Some people have legitimately had it harder than others, though.

ComDummings · 02/04/2021 20:13

@Frazzlefrazle

I've haven't witnessed anyone saying they have had it the hardest, just that it's hard for them at that moment in time. Everyone's needs to let it out to be able clear their heads. Lend an ear and tell them it'll get better.
True ^
EvilOnion · 02/04/2021 20:14

@NothingIsWrong I wouldn't even signify that poster with a response.

FTEngineerM · 02/04/2021 20:14

I don’t think it’s competitive sadness it’s just people explaining why they’ve had a shit year. I was talking to my nan about it, she’s been alone, totally alone other than FaceTime without any interaction with anyone else and I’ve been with my DP (who I saw very little before covid happened even though we live together because of shifts) and new baby continuously for months without any real interaction with anyone else.

I’d say they were both shit just in different ways. I wouldn’t want to be glued to someone else nor would I like to be alone, I think most of us live in a happy medium of those two positions.

That’s just one example of course but you get my point.

DingDongDenny · 02/04/2021 20:16

I will happily admit that I've had an easier time than many. Kept my job, I live somewhere with lots of outdoor space, no kids and a good support network.

I recognise that many people have had it harder. I think if someone says they are struggling, for whatever reason, you just have to give them support. You don't know what some people are juggling and also some people can cope with more than others

diwrnachoflleyn · 02/04/2021 20:16

Yeah, YABU. This shitstorm all needs to end soon.

AnyFucker · 02/04/2021 20:18

The milk of kindness is coursing through your veins, clearly

ChrissyPlummer · 02/04/2021 20:18

Same as @CrazyNeighbour. It’s shite, all I’ve been allowed to do is work, walk the dog and go to the supermarket. I feel like I’ve had to work all through it but haven’t been allowed to do any of the nice things like; having my hair done, going on holiday, out for a meal etc. I work as I need money for those things and recognise that I need to work to pay for them, I can’t do them though. I haven’t had the luxury of WFH, so no savings on travel either.

GlutenFreeGingerCake · 02/04/2021 20:19

YABU some situations are a lot harder. My DH enjoyed shielding so much he thought he had the best holiday ever, he's an anti social person except for tolerating me and dd and he loves to read and walk the dog. Others were not so lucky and felt very lonely, missed loved ones, live in unsuitable accommodation, trapped with abusive people or maybe have to work in a high risk job despite having some health conditions. I'm not saying some people don't complain more than their situation seems to warrant but you don't know how they care coping and a little sympathy costs nothing.

Susannahmoody · 02/04/2021 20:20

I'd say teens and single elderly people have had it hardest.

Pinotwoman82 · 02/04/2021 20:22

Totally unfair comment there about parents, a lot of parents have been trying to juggle working whilst caring for the children, while the kids who are used to going to school / having activities (football, tennis etc etc) have just been stuck at home.

PyjamaFan · 02/04/2021 20:22

I'm not moaning about lockdown at all. I've enjoyed the quieter pace of life, the freedom from pressure to see people and be doing things constantly. I haven't particularly missed anything either.

I do realise that I am lucky though!

Chicchicchicchiclana · 02/04/2021 20:23

The pandemic has been harder on some people than others. My thoughts are first and foremost with people who have lost loved ones Flowers.

Notavegan · 02/04/2021 20:23

Hope you are not my friend OP

CommanderBurnham · 02/04/2021 20:23

I think it depends on the personality but I do think some people have had it harder than others.

Went on a walk with a friend and we both agreed that we had been some of the luckier ones, even though it's not been easy, we've both had worse disasters in our lives. Staying home and keeping safe is a doddle in comparison, even though I'm frontline NHS and she's working with the homeless.

Agree with PP, just listen, make the right noises, count yourself lucky that you don't feel that you have to compete for sympathy and delicately change the subject to something a little more cheery.