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Original poster

To think Tik Tok isn’t ok for 10 yr olds

168 replies

user47000000000 · 02/04/2021 07:29

Worried about my niece who is allowed tik tok and Instagram etc. I don’t think SiL is hot on privacy controls and my niece pulled out of a bbq at ours last night with her cousins because she wanted to make tik toks... SiL supported this decision.

AIBU to think tik tok is not appropriate for a 10 yr old?

Any advice for helping her mum to see how to keep her safer online. I’m really worried about how vulnerable she could be.

OP posts:
Mollymalone123 · 02/04/2021 11:27

TikTok is anything but harmless- I just watch cute or funny ones but had to come off it as one man targeted me for no apparent reason! No idea why as I just watch them and don’t comment- also have seen one that was about sexual strangulation and a man ‘teaching’ how to do it safely 🤬 he had already put on his TikTok that he had been banned but set up again under another name. Also adults allowing live chats with children- you have no idea who they are talking to.

Spudbyanyothername · 02/04/2021 11:30

Algorithm throws up content unsuitable for 10 year olds. Doesn’t matter if you have a look and see all looks ok, the videos still can pop up and can’t be unseen.

DiscordandRhyme · 02/04/2021 11:45

My 7 and 5 year old aren't allowed it though a few friends in class are, which I find odd as hell.

They won't be getting it until they are at least 13 as that's the age they set as a minimum.

PandaFluff · 02/04/2021 11:53

That's a great idea @Monicuddle. I shall remember that.

PandaFluff · 02/04/2021 11:55

@Spudbyanyothername

Algorithm throws up content unsuitable for 10 year olds. Doesn’t matter if you have a look and see all looks ok, the videos still can pop up and can’t be unseen.
I think that's the thing for me, once seen it can't be unseen. There are some right weirdos out there.
ichundich · 02/04/2021 12:07

@Fatladyslim

I have never seen any content on tiktok like the previous posters have suggested! It is 99% weightloss and small business content and 1% food I would say.

Makes me wonder what people are searching for on their phones etc to be seeing such disgusting content!

Have you ever accepted 'cookies' before using a website / an app and do you know what an 'algorithm' is?
RandomGrammarPun · 02/04/2021 12:21

Tiktok is properly vile. Year 7s I teach often report really upsetting content they have come across when they were just looking for cute dances.

And there are awful challenges on there that encourage attempting sexual assaults (including against school staff), violence, self-harm. Just awful, awful content.

onwAndup · 02/04/2021 12:27

TT sounds awful, mine aren't on it. Seems to appeal at the lowest instincts in humans. Envy

onwAndup · 02/04/2021 12:30

Effective way to damage young generations who are groing up deeply influenced and disturbed, dare I say traumatised by shit like this. The fact that it is Chinese owned isn't exactly reassuring, is it?

onwAndup · 02/04/2021 12:30

*growing grrrrrr

Francescaisstressed · 02/04/2021 18:53

I have tiktok and have no children but worry about my nieces who do.
Twice I've seen horrific things (won't comment but we're talking r rated gave me nightmares stuff)

Tiktok is terrifying because you don't really search, stuff that is popular and being widely shared will just pop up on your fyp.

It won't take long to find examples to send along.

Conditionconditioncondition · 02/04/2021 18:56

Year 3/4 teacher here. Over 50% of my pupils have Tik Tok.

Yes it's concerning but so many children have it now that it's better to work on keeping them safe online rather than just blocking something altogether

rainbowthoughts · 02/04/2021 19:05

@Conditionconditioncondition

Year 3/4 teacher here. Over 50% of my pupils have Tik Tok.

Yes it's concerning but so many children have it now that it's better to work on keeping them safe online rather than just blocking something altogether

Shocking attitude from a teacher. There is no way to keep these young children protected on tiktok. None. It doesn't matter what you teach them, the content is there, given to them.

Conditionconditioncondition · 02/04/2021 19:11

@rainbowthoughts

I can not control the apps they download.

Children will often seek out the things they are explicitly told not to do.

We must teach them the safe way to use things.

rainbowthoughts · 02/04/2021 19:15

[quote Conditionconditioncondition]@rainbowthoughts

I can not control the apps they download.

Children will often seek out the things they are explicitly told not to do.

We must teach them the safe way to use things.[/quote]

My point is you cannot teach a child, or adult for that matter, how to safely use tiktok. It's not possible.

Washimal · 02/04/2021 19:18

We must teach them the safe way to use things.

So what exactly is "the safe way" to use Tik Tok? I'm not being facetious, I genuinely want to know because so many kids I work with stumbled upon graphic, upsetting, violent or sexual content that's been 'hidden' in Tik Tok's about baking/dancing/cats or something else that sounds completely innocent.

AliceMcK · 02/04/2021 19:24

@BlusteryLake

There are actually two issues here - TikTok itself, and addiction to social media/screens. Personally, I don't let my 11 year old on TikTok because I don't think he is old enough. More of concern though, is that your neice is allowed to duck out of family occasions to persue social media interests.
I was thinking exactly this. I would never allow my children to avoid a family event, however casual. The chances are they would end up on someone’s devise or video game but they would be doing it with the other kids there and playing games together.
Sometimeswinning · 02/04/2021 19:43

@conditionconditioncondition I was pleased to see a bit of common sense. I am surprised about year 3/4 children though!

@washimal if you set up who your children follow this is the only things which will come on their front screen. The second they press 'for you' they are into the world of tiktok. It will never be about eradicating the risk but about keeping it as low as possible.

I could completely ban it for my dd11, however how do i stop her watching it with friends? Downloading on her phone with mobile data or round friends houses.

MayYouLiveInInterestingTimes · 02/04/2021 19:54

It’s the same as YouTube. Huge variety of stuff on there, some innocuous and some deeply inappropriate and unpleasant. The u can lead anyone into sticky areas quite quickly and easily, and not all of it from active predation and ill-will either. There’s a whole culture of self harm being passed around for instance among teens. I am truly startled that anyone still thinks they can control what their children wander through innocently.

Goldenbear · 02/04/2021 20:08

Too young, I have a just turned 10 year old but still there is no way she will be having a tik tok account, she hates the idea luckily!

Francescaisstressed · 02/04/2021 20:10

You cannot use tiktok safely. Videos pop up on your fyp based on what is popular along with what you search for but I have random things aswell.
It is not suited or designed for 10 year olds, I think it's supposed to be 13 plus
Anyone who suggests teaching them to use it safely obviously hasn't used it themselves, it is random and there are no safety blocks or features.
Not wanting to trigger anyone but my searches are weight loss related and some comedy.
A video of a man commitng suicide randomly popped up on my fyp.
It is not suitable for pre teen kids at all.

ludothedog · 02/04/2021 20:12

You can take parental control of your child's tiktok account and set it to under 13 year old content. I've done this with DD's account.

BloodyHellAudrey · 02/04/2021 20:25

@Fatladyslim

I have never seen any content on tiktok like the previous posters have suggested! It is 99% weightloss and small business content and 1% food I would say.

Makes me wonder what people are searching for on their phones etc to be seeing such disgusting content!

If you were to go through my internet history it's amazon, H&M, the SANDS forum and mumsnet, occasionally new look and sleep meditation on YouTube.

You cannot control what the fyp throws at you. But it definitely isn't all weightloss and small businesses content. It's trending videos.

One just came up on mine which appears innocuous, a young northern woman chatting in her dressing gown, except she's talking about fingering her bumhole on only fans. In a "funny" way, but still, that's the video.

The tags aren't subject specific, the same tag is used for thousands of videos all with different content. She hasn't put "#bumhole" "#analchat" or whatever, there's nothing on that video to suggest that that is her content.

So if you like a video that has #foryourpage then any video, with any content that also has #foryourpage can be the next one you see. There's no controlling that because that's the purpose of the tags.

rainbowthoughts · 02/04/2021 20:39

@ludothedog

You can take parental control of your child's tiktok account and set it to under 13 year old content. I've done this with DD's account.

Can you tell us how?

IndecentFeminist · 02/04/2021 20:41

You really can't control the fyp. Unless they have changed it very recently