Double standards on mn.

[thatwasme22]

This week so far:

1. I have seen various posters defend Caroline Flack for having issues. Maybe she did but then the same argument would not be made on Chris Browne.

1. A thread on the physical attractiveness on male politicians. Imagine a male forum did this on females.

1. A thread with a woman hiding her inheritance from her husband and encouraged to do so by many posters and him being called financially abusive for being sensible over money. When men do this on mn it's all ltb.

Am I missing something? I call myself a feminist so am pro equality and that's how I raised my kids but why is this not being called out on mn?

@JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows just stop tagging me and leaving me alone now I don't need to grow up because I don't agree with you my opinion as I have said is as valid as yours , you maybe need to find something else to do as you seem a little over invested on this , jumping on anyone quite harshly that doesn't share your view
I have asked you a couple of times now to leave me alone

you seem a little over invested on this

So what if she is?

@Knowingitsallover well in your words "I can post what I like" 🤷‍♀️

Just accept that you made a false claim you couldn't back up rather than throwing your toys out the pram because people asked you for proof of your claims

*claims

@MinnieMous3

you seem a little over invested on this

So what if she is?

This is SUCH a gaslighty tactic - "Oh my you're over invested/overreacting dear".

@JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows stop tagging me its borderline harassment I have asked you nicely to leave me alone I have some other more serious things going on in my life and I need to be able to respond to my emails not have continuous notifications from you.
So now please stop tagging me for the third time

Erm nobody is forcing you to be on MN. We are connected through the internet, not in person, I'm not standing over you, if you need to respond to emails then respond to emails. Stop blaming me because you can't prioritise your "serious things".

You can't cry "harassment" when you yourself have tagged many people on this thread as often as you like.

But i have asked you nicely to please stop tagging me if someone asked me I would stop , I can get my priorities straight but you don't know me or what I am going through and I have asked a few times please don't tag me
Harassment was the wrong word to use and for that I apologise .
Quote me and reply as you have done now by all means but I am not in a good place and have several unexpected things going on so please don't tag me is all I asked especially as I hadn't come back to this thread since yesterday and stayed away for a reason, it comes up on my emails and notifications thats all I am asking . I would do that if someone asked me nicely several times. So please things have changed for me and I would appreciate if we can just leave it as it is for now

@MarieIVanArkleStinks

-Yes it is, but it’s about double standards being tolerated, supported, not called out across mn as a whole. You can say something about a man, and about a woman, and get very different responses*.

Picture this. A patriarchal society with a frighteningly misogynistic culture in which 2-3 women a WEEK (statistics, Women's Aid) are killed by men, and twice the average statistic of women have been killed during lockdown by their male partners. A society in which hundreds, thousands of women responded in their droves to #MeToo and awareness started to spread of how pervasive a scourge on our society this is. In which, just this month, stories have started to break - frightening, heartbreaking stories - about the horrible atmosphere of disrespect against girls and, yes, rape culture, pervading our schools.

In one corner of toxic cyberspace, in a society set up to privilege and serve the interests of the half of the human population who happen to be sporting a penis, there's a site with a predominantly female demographic. On some of its threads, the scales of this overwhelming pro-male bias and anti-female prejudice are tipped in favour of women.

Well, fuck me.

Great post Mariel.

And to that off-the-top-of-your-head list of abusive men I'll add George Best and Maradona. Both lauded as "legends". Both abusers of women. But, well, they probably deserved it, didn't they? Still can't think of any famous women who have retained their status while knowingly abusing their partners but I'll wait for examples.

I don't believe MN is full of double standards. It's full of different people with differing opinions who choose which threads to comment on.

''Still can't think of any famous women who have retained their status while knowingly abusing their partners but I'll wait for examples.''

1. Kelly Brook went on This Morning laughing about it.

1. Linda Hamilton openly admitted to physically attacking her husbands.

1. Liza Minelli attacked David Gest.

1. Cheryl Cole battered a black woman in a toilet and several people heard racist remarks yet she became the 'nation's sweetheart'. [not domestic violence but still]

1. Marilyn Monroe and Princess Diana both slept with other woman's husbands. Yea the men were to blame too but the women both still knew these men had wives at home. Both are seen as inspirational, victim like and in Diana's case 'a saint.' Again not dm but behaviour that men would get crucified for on mn.

1. All Whitney Houston's problems were blamed on Bobby Brown by the media like she was a victim- yea like reverse the gender here and see if the woman would blamed for leading the man astray. She even admitted hitting him saying “Contrary to belief, I do the hitting, he doesn’t. He has never put his hands on me. We are crazy for one another. I mean crazy in love, love, love, love, love. When we’re fighting, it’s like that’s love for us. We’re fighting for our love,”

1. Emma Roberts and Evan Peters. She was arrested for domestic violence after they had a violent fight that left him with a bloody nose and bite marks.

1. Kelly Bensimo of “The Real Housewives of New York City” was arrested for attacking her boyfriend-at-the-time Nick Stefanov.

@thatwasme22

''Still can't think of any famous women who have retained their status while knowingly abusing their partners but I'll wait for examples.''

1. Kelly Brook went on This Morning laughing about it.

1. Linda Hamilton openly admitted to physically attacking her husbands.

1. Liza Minelli attacked David Gest.

1. Cheryl Cole battered a black woman in a toilet and several people heard racist remarks yet she became the 'nation's sweetheart'. [not domestic violence but still]

1. Marilyn Monroe and Princess Diana both slept with other woman's husbands. Yea the men were to blame too but the women both still knew these men had wives at home. Both are seen as inspirational, victim like and in Diana's case 'a saint.' Again not dm but behaviour that men would get crucified for on mn.

1. All Whitney Houston's problems were blamed on Bobby Brown by the media like she was a victim- yea like reverse the gender here and see if the woman would blamed for leading the man astray. She even admitted hitting him saying “Contrary to belief, I do the hitting, he doesn’t. He has never put his hands on me. We are crazy for one another. I mean crazy in love, love, love, love, love. When we’re fighting, it’s like that’s love for us. We’re fighting for our love,”

1. Emma Roberts and Evan Peters. She was arrested for domestic violence after they had a violent fight that left him with a bloody nose and bite marks.

1. Kelly Bensimo of “The Real Housewives of New York City” was arrested for attacking her boyfriend-at-the-time Nick Stefanov.

1.	Not an assault then
2.	Have googled, never seen anything that said this. Only allusion to her marriages was that she had to ask James Cameron to treat her like a human
3.	A claim only raised when he tried to get a divorce settlement and one she denied 
4.	The black woman wasn’t her partner - but I agree I am baffled as to why people forget this about her
5.	Not an assault then, just immoral and nothing their husbands weren’t doing themselves 
6.	Sounds like the mantra of an abused wife to me considering she said that fairly early on. After their divorce she was explicitly that he was abusive. Also Bobby Brown was charged with attacking her

7&8 - fair enough

So you’ve found 2 Z-listers who have average careers. That’s the same as someone who has become the president and someone who has sold millions of records. Well done

1.Not an assault then

Eh kelly Brook admitted to punching all 3 men on the face.

2.Have googled, never seen anything that said this. Only allusion to her marriages was that she had to ask James Cameron to treat her like a human

She openly said she attacked her husbands on Larry King yet still goes down as 1 of the most iconic figures ever on film. transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0510/14/lkl.01.html

4.The black woman wasn’t her partner - but I agree I am baffled as to why people forget this about her

Because she was attractive and white.

5.Not an assault then, just immoral and nothing their husbands weren’t doing themselves.

Doesn't justify their behaviour and Monroe wasn't married during these affairs.

6.Sounds like the mantra of an abused wife to me considering she said that fairly early on. After their divorce she was explicitly that he was abusive. Also Bobby Brown was charged with attacking her

She admitted it several times, I recall another interview somewhere where she admitted attacking him.

7&8 - fair enough

''So you’ve found 2 Z-listers who have average careers. That’s the same as someone who has become the president and someone who has sold millions of records. Well done hmm''

Emma Roberts is not Z list. Z list is an ex Corrie star you see on I'm A celeb.

I think the Chris brown analogy is poor , but on the whole, I totally agree with you that men get a far harder time on MN.

5. Marilyn Monroe and Princess Diana both slept with other woman's husbands. Yea the men were to blame too but the women both still knew these men had wives at home. Both are seen as inspirational, victim like and in Diana's case 'a saint.' Again not dm but behaviour that men would get crucified for on mn

Really, really disgusting to compare this to domestic violence. Affairs are not illegal.

''Really, really disgusting to compare this to domestic violence. Affairs are not illegal.''

The thread is not about dm though and there was no comparison, it is about behaviour in general men get crucified for on mn and that women too often get excused for on here. I clearly outlined that and I was bringing it into the post as it was about female celebrities.

The thread is not about dm though and there was no comparison, it is about behaviour in general men get crucified for on mn and that women too often get excused for on here. I clearly outlined that and I was bringing it into the post as it was about female celebrities

No, when discussing men who have raped and beaten women, bringing in women who have had affairs as a comparison, is really pretty offensive.

@thatwasme22 erm you were replying to my request of finding 19 women who'd assaulted men and still had flourishing careers. You named 2 - loads of other I had to Google including the allegedly 'iconic' Linda Hamilton.

I could refute your post point by point but TBH I've got better things to do than waste my time pandering to MRAs who will t suddenly stop hating women because of one MN post

@Thelnebriati

When you see the same poster using double standards, call them out.

We try.

It's accused of being whataboutery.

@Butwasitherdriveway

I think the Chris brown analogy is poor , but on the whole, I totally agree with you that men get a far harder time on MN.

When? Where? Why?

Men 'get crucified on MN'.

On pointing out that on male dominated sites, in society and etc women get. Hmmm not sure of the term crucified. When it comes to crosses and killing people it's usually men doing that stuff I'm pretty sure. But anyway. It's apparently not within the scope of the conversation to point out that anything said here, or the violence women commit in real life, is nothing to what men say about and do to women and girls the world over.

That's beside the point. Apparently.

Unless women and girls are perfect, and until they are, men's words and actions should not be considered.

Slight problem here in that whatever women and girls do or say, it's generally still not good enough.

@NiceGerbil

Men 'get crucified on MN'.

On pointing out that on male dominated sites, in society and etc women get. Hmmm not sure of the term crucified. When it comes to crosses and killing people it's usually men doing that stuff I'm pretty sure. But anyway. It's apparently not within the scope of the conversation to point out that anything said here, or the violence women commit in real life, is nothing to what men say about and do to women and girls the world over.

That's beside the point. Apparently.

Unless women and girls are perfect, and until they are, men's words and actions should not be considered.

Slight problem here in that whatever women and girls do or say, it's generally still not good enough.

Yup

No chance @Pumperthepumper. I'm daft but not that daft.

@Butwasitherdriveway

No chance *@Pumperthepumper*. I'm daft but not that daft.

What? What does that mean?

It means I'm not biting, pumper.

@Butwasitherdriveway

It means I'm not biting, pumper.

Biting what? You floated an idea, you must know why you think that? You must have evidence of it? You must have a theory for why men get a harder time here, otherwise you wouldn’t think it.