Aggressive cyclist encounter

[UrbanRambler]

For background, I'm overweight and do a daily walk, to control my weight and for my mental health (I am prone to depression and anxiety). I walk in my local area (city suburb, mixture of nice and not so nice areas). Over the last year I've increased my walk from 2 miles to 5 miles a day, and this has helped me to lose 1 stone. I'm still a stone overweight, but being tall I carry it reasonable well.

Walking during Covid has become trickier, as the pavements and parks have been busier with more people taking walks, but most people are polite and considerate. All good. I have no issues with pedestrians, but there are a lot more cyclists on the pavements now, and some of them have no consideration for walkers. When they approach from behind, you often can't hear them until they're very close, which can be unnerving.

Today I was walking along a wide pavement (around 8ft) when a cyclist zoomed past me at speed, brushing my shoulder as he went by. He came from behind, and really made me jump, and I muttered "twat" under my breath (it was a reflex action... I wasn't meaning to challenge him, it just came out). Trouble was, he heard it! He stopped a few feet ahead of me, turned around and shouted "Fuck off!" then stood there, glaring at me. He looked about 16 -18, and full of rage. I tried to diffuse things a bit, and calmly said "Well, you were going quite fast, and were too close... some consideration would be nice" then he shouted "Fuck off you c*t!" I was scared, but wasn't going to show it. I said "There's no need for that language... you were going too fast" then he said "Fuck off! Anyway - what do you weigh - about 20 stone?! Fuck off, you c*t!" He then cycled off.

I am rethinking my walking route now, and feel worried about seeing him again. I was quite pleased at my progress, but now I feel shaken and unsure about my walks. The weight comment was just a cheap shot from a stroppy teenager, but he looked me up and down with such contempt that it made me feel absolutely gross. (I don't mean that to be disrespectful to anyone else struggling with their weight, some overweight women are beautiful but I'm rather plain).

I know IWBU and stupid to say that word out loud, and brought trouble on myself - maybe I need to tape my mouth shut in future! But for context, in the southern town where I live, the word "twat" just means "idiot", rather than the ruder meaning that it has in other places.

I can't get this out of my head and feel anxious about it all. I wish there were rear view mirrors for pedestrians... maybe I should just carry a small mirror? AIBU to ask for any suggestions or thoughts about this?

Unpleasant.

He was a twat. He was riding too fast, too close to you. Is it meant to be a dual use pavement or should he not even have been on it?

Don't change your route, it's unlikely you'll encounter this twat again.

Cyclists should use bells. He was an idiot and is hopefully feeling guilty at this very moment.

What a twat. Funny how it’s always men who behave like this, eh?

Just remind yourself that in 6 months' time you will barely remember this incident and go on as normal, try to think of something else whenever the memory pops into your head. There will always be twats in the world, the opinion of this one is really of no importance. Well done on your weight loss!

Well tbf you insulted him first

He was being unreasonable, an idiot and rude but can we please not turn this into a cyclist bashing thread

You were spot on - he's a twat. You don't need to carry a mirror or worry about accommodating cyclists on the pavement. You've been walking a year and you came across one utter tosser; don't let him ruin it for you.

Test. Don't overthink just carry on as you normally do.

That was meant to twat, and him not you!

Don't worry about him. He will not make that mistake again. He's an idiot and if you see him another time he'll give you a wide berth. If he was going to do anything he would have done it there and then.
Nasty mouth though. Very upsetting, but designed to be so. When they are immature and angry they use the gob as a weapon. Sticks and stones OP.

@ErrolTheDragon I'm not sure whether it's dual use, but a lot of cyclists treat it that way. I was right over to one side so there was no need for him to zoom past so close. He seemed to ooze aggression from every pore.

He was a twat. You weren't a cunt.

Keep going the same route, phone in hand. Watch on the video (not pointed his way) if he starts on you. So you have evidence.

And bloody well done on getting fitter.

He sounds very unpleasant but I don’t see how he could both zoom by you at speed and hear you mutter ‘twat’ under your breath. You have called out ‘twat’ at least loud enough for a fast moving cyclist to hear which I think puts a slightly different spin on it. But it was obviously a horrible experience for you, he was completely out of order and I hope you don’t let you put it off your walks.

@Happycat1212

Well tbf you insulted him first

True. I provoked him. Like I said, it was a reflex action and not meant for him to hear - stupid of me.

@LaBellina Yes, it seems that way. I've never encountered this kind of thing with a female cyclist, but maybe that's because fewer women cycle than men?

You didn't "provoke" him. He behaved like a twat, you responded. It's entirely his fault.

@yourfaceisaforeignfood I didn't call out the word, but it's fair to say it was probably louder than muttering... my mistake.

So mistakenly brushing past someone means it’s ok to shout an insult at them? Really since when? Reminds me of the time I got on the bus and accidentally brushed my pram past a man who was spreading his legs out into the aisle so I didn’t see him as my pram blocked the view, I said sorry but as I passed him he decided to call me a bitch. I bet if it was a woman that accidentally brushed passed a man and he called her a twat people wouldn’t be saying it was ok!

Stop projecting Happycat1212. Unless the bus aisle was 8ft wide and you were going 20mph, it's not comparable.

Maybe he misjudged the space. I don’t think calling insults after someone who brushes past you is acceptable, but I think the op has probably learned her lesson not to give it if you can’t take it.

You didn’t provoke him - what bollocks. He cycled dangerously and was the provocateur. You responded to his aggressive behaviour and although shaken by his shitty response were entirely correct. Sod him and his aggression, his lack of care and his entitlement that makes him think he can behave like that. Well done

Ans it’s not because there are fewer women cyclists but because there are fewer aggressive women. Cycling like that is dangerous and threatening.

But accidentally brushing past someone whilst walking is a totally different experience to a bike coming past you at speed which is dangerous.
I used to walk my dog beside a canal and have had similar experiences of cyclists coming up behind me at speed, it's frightening and I have had a couple of unpleasant interactions in a similar vein, always men funnily enough.
Don't let him make you change your route op, keep going and well done on the weight loss.

@Happycat1212 I didn't shout at him (see my comment above).

He was breaking the law by riding on the pavement anyway. Since when do you apologize to lawbreakers?