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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want to take part in the 8pm doorstep vigil

143 replies

MiscUser9823 · 23/03/2021 14:58

AIBU to not want to take part in the 8pm doorstep vigil?

My reasons - I like to keep to myself, my neighbours are hypocrites and virtue signallers, it wont make a difference, and I dont like being told what to do by.

OP posts:
sunnydaleslayer · 23/03/2021 15:00

YANBU.

I won't be doing it.

GoddessKali · 23/03/2021 15:00

Who’s telling you to take part in a doorstep vigil?

If you don’t want to do something - then don’t! You’re a free adult being whom I presume no one is forcing you into this?

nicknamehelp · 23/03/2021 15:00

Well don't then its not law you have to but for some it will help with what they have been through in the last years and others may want to do it to show support for those who need it.

Crunchymum · 23/03/2021 15:00

A vigil for what?

ShesMadeATwatOfMePam · 23/03/2021 15:01

Don't do it then. I don't do any of those things because i can't see the point.

thecognoscenti · 23/03/2021 15:02

Ok - so don't?

AnneLovesGilbert · 23/03/2021 15:02

Then don’t. No one’s going to make you. It’s not the law. You surely don’t need ransoms on here to tell you that?

AnneLovesGilbert · 23/03/2021 15:03

@Crunchymum

A vigil for what?
The 126k+ deaths.
Justcallmebebes · 23/03/2021 15:04

What vigil?

Nicolastuffedone · 23/03/2021 15:04

Well, don’t then.

Original poster
MiscUser9823 · 23/03/2021 15:04

@AnneLovesGilbert

Then don’t. No one’s going to make you. It’s not the law. You surely don’t need ransoms on here to tell you that?
I realise im not compelled to. I just wanted feedback and opinions as to whether people understand where I am coming from and/or am I being unreasonable?
OP posts:
waitingpatientlyforspring · 23/03/2021 15:05

Wasn't aware if any vigil - I won't be taking part.

AnneLovesGilbert · 23/03/2021 15:05

Of course you’re not unreasonable.

Persipan · 23/03/2021 15:06

I didn't even know there was going to be one. Neither, if anyone asks, did you.

LindsayDenton79 · 23/03/2021 15:06

Is this going to be every week, you know how we like to do things to death

PandaFluff · 23/03/2021 15:07

You don't need a reason not to. Join in if you want don't if you don't.

80sMum · 23/03/2021 15:07

You're definitely not unreasonable not to take part. I won't be doing it either - and also didn't participate in the ridiculous clapping every Thursday last year.

I cannot abide all the virtue signalling that goes on around these rather pointless rituals. Stand your ground, OP!

jessstan2 · 23/03/2021 15:10

I didn't even know there was going to be one. You don't have to join in if you don't want to anyway. I never did the clap and cheer for the NHS last year, always forgot about it. I've no idea if my neighbours did or didn't.

x2boys · 23/03/2021 15:10

Well don't then🙄,I don't think anyone will care one way or the other tbh

pigsDOfly · 23/03/2021 15:11

Didn't know about this.

I won't be doing it either.

Does it mean we're going to have all the saucepan banging and fireworks nonsense again.

Original poster
MiscUser9823 · 23/03/2021 15:11

@80sMum

You're definitely not unreasonable not to take part. I won't be doing it either - and also didn't participate in the ridiculous clapping every Thursday last year.

I cannot abide all the virtue signalling that goes on around these rather pointless rituals. Stand your ground, OP!

Thanks 80sMum. I also didnt do the clap (for other reasons - mistreated and treated horribly by NHS hospital staff on the 1 occasion I used them as an adult).

I dont mind silences of respect, and will happily do the rememberance day silence every year. But this clapping and vigil stuff isnt something I want to do.

OP posts:
Original poster
MiscUser9823 · 23/03/2021 15:12

@jessstan2

I didn't even know there was going to be one. You don't have to join in if you don't want to anyway. I never did the clap and cheer for the NHS last year, always forgot about it. I've no idea if my neighbours did or didn't.
Ive actually got a neighbour that looks from 2nd floor house window to see which houses take and dont take part in the clap, etc... The funny part is, she is one of the hypocrites that doesnt abide by lockdown.
OP posts:
MrsTulipTattsyrup · 23/03/2021 15:13

I hate this sort of virtue signalling at the best of times, but I find this particularly objectionable because the deaths from COVID aren’t yet over. Are the people who die today, tomorrow, next week, next month not equally worthy of mourning?

Save it for when we are past this and we can, if the country decides to, erect a national memorial to all the victims - not just those who have neatly died before the arbitrary one-year anniversary of a lockdown which came too late and was therefore one of the reasons that there are so many names to remember.

StellaKowalski · 23/03/2021 15:13

Wasn't even aware. Won't be doing it.

maddening · 23/03/2021 15:16

Only 3 houses would know if did or didn't, we are on a new build estate but don't really face any other house, there are 3 to one side that can see our front and the playground and that's it. When it was the weekly clap for carers we were literally stood on our own clapping so seemed pointless in the end 😂

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