To think that all men watch porn even when in a sexually gratifying relationship ?

[pedestalpony]

Possibly done to death but do they or at least the majority and if so are you ok with it ?
No real back story but have reason to believe that my bf does now and again ... mainly through presumption of women he follows on Facebook ... first six pictures etc.
I know he also games with many men and women throughout the world through that platform so he has many' friends' from that..
He doesn't like or comment on the women's posts but they show up now and again on the six profile pics of his friends on Facebook .
Am I being a prude/ presumptuous / overthinking .

@ShrikeAttack

I always think it's a bit odd when posters proclaim that all men watch porn and that women that think they don't are somehow naive or deluded. I don't understand why they're so keen to insist it's so. Is it because they have to believe that to accept their own partner's porn usage, or because they want to be seen as somehow more worldly?

Do I think the vast majority of men have seen porn at some point? Yes. Do I think all men use porn on a regular basis? No. Because, just like women, all men are individuals, have different tastes, desires, sexual motivations and moral frameworks.

It's a bit strange to make such sweeping statements.

I totally agree.

And the PP questioning the statement that another poster made about the man she knows finding it exploitative - why? Are men literally not capable of having that opinion? None of them?

There are statistics for this.

post them then

Sorry. I
May not have been clear . Lots of his facebook friends are from
A specific game they play from
Around the world . It's a popular game with millions of users worldwide . Possibly 70% of his friends on Facebook play this game as he is more active on Other social media platforms with real life friends . He is not a huge fan and f face book. He uses it to play this game .
I noticed that woman and wondered if she was there for voyeuristic reasons and
Because she was in his first six friend pics, I jumped to the conclusion that she was essentially there as he had looked her up for porn: wank reasons .Most of the other gamers he is friends with don't present themselves in such attire on Facebook .

No idea what percentage of men (or women) do or don’t. But I don’t think it has anything to do with whether you’re in a sexually gratifying relationship or not. Sometimes, even if you are in a relationship where you have really good sex daily, you just want a wank. We have sex daily, sometimes we both also wank. It just means you want a quick orgasm without having to worry about somebody else, and has no bearing in your partner. I suspect when it comes to how you get that orgasm, many men turn to porn because they learned it as a habit.

And I really doubt men who use porn connect it to whether or not they respect women, any more than people who own electronic gadgets connect it to whether or not they agree with conflict minerals, or people who eat papaya connect it with whether or not they respect poor farmers in Sierra Leone.

How can you both WFH and not have a computer?

Do you think men can separate porn use or getting aroused by sexual imagery from their relationship?

Forget the porn aspect a second - pp who mention their partners couldn't possibly watch it, because they have full access to their phone, email, tv, WhatsApp and god knows what else. Plus are with them 24 hours a day, and it's just not possible because I'd know - I really think there are more things to worry about in those relationships than If your SO watches porn. Having absolutely no privacy and no personal space whatsoever, is surely as unhealthy as they deem porn use to be?

Definitely the majority, if not all men watch porn and so do many women.

You’ll find the ones who’ve said their partners definitely don’t watch it is because they don’t like porn themselves so the partner is more secretive.

I found that weird as well.

EG Some men will have had experiences in their lives that mean they really don't enjoy watching the sort of content that is most common now.

There is a massive problem with normalisation, desensitisation though.

And I do wonder what it does to a psyche to consume this stuff all the time. I think for many viewers they don't engage with it at the level of seeing the people, especially the women, as living real humans... More like watching a cartoon or something.

@Meredithgrey1 because its such an obvious thing to say to try and look good and as not all porn is exploitative it doesn't even make sense

Thing is the OP didn't even mention porn.

It was about Facebook and some women he games with.

Maybe it would be good to engage with what the OP said rather than having the same old argument that will never meet in the middle!

Do you think men can separate porn use or getting aroused by sexual imagery from their relationship?

Can’t speak for others but likely yes . On the occasion I watch it it’s out my head as soon as I finish watching . I’m not comparing the men to men that I may have had feelings for / a relationship with in real life it’s just something to watch at that time

@NiceGerbil

Thing is the OP didn't even mention porn.

It was about Facebook and some women he games with.

Maybe it would be good to engage with what the OP said rather than having the same old argument that will never meet in the middle!

The title of the thread is do men watch porn even if in a gratifying relationship - so, yes op does mention porn. And has in replies throughout the thread.

I have access to all my DH internet.use I use his email account as mine ,there are many things I could question but porn no

Most porn sites are free and you don’t need to sign up to them so there’s no way you’d know if your partner was watching them or not.

@Helmetbymidnight

There are statistics for this.

post them then

According to Daspe et al. (2017) 73 percent of women and 98 percent of men reported internet porn use in the last six months, for a total of 85 percent of respondents. For porn use within the last week, the numbers were lower: 80 percent of men and 26 percent of women.

My DP said he watched a huge amount of porn as a teen/early 20s but he is now bored of it and never watches it anymore (he’s 36). I’m sure if he came across some sort of porn type pic or video he’d have a quick look but he doesn’t intentionally look for it anymore and he has no reason to lie as he knows I don’t really care. He said he prefers to use his imagination when masturbating these days (which he also doesn’t do regularly anymore).
I’m fairly sure most men (and women) have watched porn fairly regularly and one point or another in their life

How can anyone possible state that all or nearly all men watch porn. You can know about your own experience of men which will be a tiny percentage of all the men in the world. You can form your own opinions on the basis of that but you can’t possible generalise that to the whole of the male population. It may or may not be true - but nobody actually knows

@pedestalpony

Sorry. I May not have been clear . Lots of his facebook friends are from A specific game they play from Around the world . It's a popular game with millions of users worldwide . Possibly 70% of his friends on Facebook play this game as he is more active on Other social media platforms with real life friends . He is not a huge fan and f face book. He uses it to play this game . I noticed that woman and wondered if she was there for voyeuristic reasons and Because she was in his first six friend pics, I jumped to the conclusion that she was essentially there as he had looked her up for porn: wank reasons .Most of the other gamers he is friends with don't present themselves in such attire on Facebook .

You think she’s there for voyeuristic reasons because of what she is wearing?

Seriously? You do know women can wear what the fuck they like and it doesn’t make them porn stars?

Would you find it acceptable if a man had said this?

'According to Daspe et al. (2017) 73 percent of women and 98 percent of men reported internet porn use in the last six months, for a total of 85 percent of respondents'

Was this across all ages, backgrounds etc? Certain country? Got a link?

imalmostthere

I agree!!

I don’t personally like it, but I’m pretty sure DH does in his ‘personal time’. That’s his business though. He knows I don’t agree with it so he’d never be obvious about it.

Almost there sure, the meat of her OP was something else though and a bit odd TBH.

Being suspicious of female gaming friends because they appear on someone else's profile? That doesn't make sense.

Pretty sure my DH doesn’t. TBH I don’t know when he’d have the time and he’s s more interested in other things like running and bikes!

We’ve both watched it previously, but got better things to do with our time tbh.

Oops missed OP updates

Will have a read.

@NiceGerbil

I found that weird as well.

EG Some men will have had experiences in their lives that mean they really don't enjoy watching the sort of content that is most common now.

There is a massive problem with normalisation, desensitisation though.

And I do wonder what it does to a psyche to consume this stuff all the time. I think for many viewers they don't engage with it at the level of seeing the people, especially the women, as living real humans... More like watching a cartoon or something.

But for all the claims that it’s now more or less ubiquitous for men who use porn to want to watch violent or degrading porn, or simulated rape, I’ve never seen any statistics which bear this out. It is still niche content. Plenty of men (and women) who do use porn, don’t watch that sort of porn, and have absolutely no interest. Watching people having sex is sexy. Plenty of men (and women) do watch pretty “tame” conventional porn and do engage with the women in it. There’s far, far more of a market for “ordinary”, one-on-one heterosexual sex in a couple of different positions in a home environment; or mildly taboo scenarios like sex outdoors or in a car.

Just as there are several hundred channels on my Virgin TV package and I still only watch a total of about ten programmes across three channels because I’m not even curious about Ru Paul’s Drag Race or American Pickers, however often I have to scroll past it.