Let me hear your most ridiculous baby boasts

[SmidgenofaPigeon]

It’s going to get worse isn’t it

I’ve been on here long enough to know that babies can bring out the worst competitiveness in parents, I wasn’t expecting it to start quite so early.

Last week I had my 12 week scan, first baby. I was very nervous due to a previous loss. The sonographer thankfully let me hear the heartbeat straight away, but when she found the baby, it was very still. She got me to move around a bit to wake it up, which it eventually did, so she could get some pictures and measurements etc.

For some reason, I’d not considered they slept in there. I was jokingly telling my friend who had a baby last year, that ours was asleep when she started the scan. ‘Oh’ says my friend. ‘Ours was very active, she was jumping around all over the place, she even waved. But she’s always been very curious about everything. You’re probably going to have quite a lazy baby, I’d think.’

So there we go, at three months and still in my womb, someone has already compared my baby to their’s

Let me hear some other examples and have a laugh.

I know someone who has started potty training at 10 months. She then got really annoyed when her SIL started potty training at 4 months (yes, seriously!) I don't really understand how it is possible to start that young as the 10 month old can't walk to the potty and take their trousers down and a 4 month old wouldn't even be able to sit upright on it!

These are amazing! I remember seeing someone (maybe on here?) using the fact that their baby had a perfect apgar score at birth as concrete evidence that they were “gifted”

My DM claimed my DB potty trained himself shortly after the age of 1, something he demonstrated by taking off his nappy and firmly saying OFF, and refusing to wear one ever again. That was it apparently, he was dry after that.

My DF and I on the other hand, remember an awful lot of 'accidents', which seem to have slipped her mind...

Well mine were all writing haikus and composing sonatas in the womb.....

Years of this ahead op, but at least you'll get material for threads on here!

I was told DS would be boss eyed because his eyes were 'all over the place' as a newborn...

@Mrsfrumble

These are amazing! I remember seeing someone (maybe on here?) using the fact that their baby had a perfect apgar score at birth as concrete evidence that they were “gifted”

Was that the thread where the OP said that the midwife had written 'very alert' on her discharge notes and that this was proof that her child's abilities had been recognised by professionals at an early age?

Mine slept through 16 hours of labour. They kept juggling my tummy and trying to wake her up. She’d wake for a bit and then go back to sleep. Ended up having a csection. Was a great sleeper from 12 weeks and we were incredibly smug about it. Nightmare sleeper from 2 until 7 years - karma for being smug I’m sure !

Sorry - jiggling my tummy

At my 20-week scan my son gave me a gesture that looked very like the finger. I remember commenting to the sonographer: 'not even born yet and already he's giving me attitude!'

Competitive parenting really is the pits, so I hear you there. Playing them a piece of the music Felix Mendelssohn wrote at the age of 12 should soon shut them up. People are not all geniuses or abnormally more advanced than others - especially in childhood. That's rare.

@SnugglySnerd

I had twins. One of them was head down and constantly asleep. The other was transverse and never kept still, in one scan close to the birth the sonographer said she was kicking her brother! They are exactly like that now, aged 4. Ds will concentrate on an activity he likes for quite a while and he sleeps well. He often lies down on the floor and goes to sleep for a bit if he is tired. He likes rules and if you tell him he mustn't touch something e.g. the cooker he won't touch it and tells everyone else not to. His sister is constantly on the go, into everything, hated naps and rarely sleeps all night. She has caused every grey hair on my head!

Ah this is so nice to read, mine too. My never stopped kicking twin still never stops moving and isn’t a great fan of sleep and my quiet twin who gave me all the reduced movement scares is a very chilled little person.

@Mrsfrumble

These are amazing! I remember seeing someone (maybe on here?) using the fact that their baby had a perfect apgar score at birth as concrete evidence that they were “gifted”

That’s brilliant

Some people love turning everything into a competition.
I ended up in a bizarre competition during pregnancy as I had complications and had to be monitored. Someone I know seemed to think it was a badge of honour that they 'hardly saw' their midwives as if they had a special talent for pregnancy, but then also said it 'must be nice for you to have all those extra scans'. 🙄

I didn't have the mental energy to point out that there is nothing nice about having to regularly check you still have a baby.

That’s ridiculous. I’m currently 26 weeks pregnant and my baby has been a mixture of zoomy little sod that won’t let the sonographer take the measurements they need and the laziest sleepiest baby on the planet during the scans. Yes, he’s “waved” at me if you count an involuntary movement of his arm as a wave

My favourite boast was the woman at a mother & toddler group who announced her 6 month old had been "headhunted" by the local pre-school because they felt she'd fit in much better there than baby group due to her advanced level. It was particularly bad taste boasting as it came on a day when we were celebrating one of the children sitting up for the first time - the child was nearly one and had significant health issues so it was a massive deal for his Mum.

The same woman also made outrageous claims about her 8yo DS before she finally clicked that (when not on ML) I worked in his school.

Friend's baby started teething at 2 months. First tooth popped 10 months after. Another's little boy repeated 'everything' his mum said at 7 months.
But then again my first born was quite early hitting her milestones and I was ( hopefully very quietly !)
pretty sure it was due to our excellent parenting. Then came the second DD ...

At the 12 week scan mine was fast asleep I had to jump around to wake him up... he is very very active and not a great sleeper- go figure!
When he woke up in the scan, there is a very clear image of him flipping us the bird (doubt it was actually his middle finger but the overall hand looked that shape) which the sonograher found hilarious and printed off for us lol.
I know I haven't answered your question but thought I'd add onto your experience!

Haha this is hilarious and reminds me why l very quickly stopped discussing my dd's mini achievements when she was a baby!
My friend told me her boy's nursery "confirmed" if he had started school a year early he would have been ok because y'know he is sooo intelligent.
Righty-ho!

DS aged around 1yo, we had been to baby softplay with a family member who had a similarly aged child and it was time to leave. DS was absolutely losing his shit because he was hungry or tired or something. I remarked to relative something saracastic along the lines of "isn't this a magical age?" and she replied "John (her DC) doesn't ever cry, he finds it embarrassing".

A mum at baby group told me that her DC was such an old soul and that's why he was so far ahead of the babies. The phrases "leader of the pack" and "he's been here before" were used. She then told me that my DC was "brand spanking new" with a pitying glance as he lay face down grunting at the carpet.

I know someone who told everyone who’d listen that she’d have to choose her DD’s outfit really carefully for another child’s christening as the other mother I may be insanely jealous of how attractive her DD was 😂.

Also my MIL proudly told us that our niece was waking and talking, which was quite shocking as she was well under a year old. Turns out she was babbling and could move her feet if you held her in the air!

I remember having a conversation and complaining about the sleepless nights, the lady I was talking to proudly said “mine has slept through the night from 3 months old” so lucky I thought, she then carried on “he just wakes for one feed each night”. I’m not sure she understood what sleeping through the night meant!

I do remember being a bit ‘pfb’ though and being so proud that ds1 are everything I have him, I was definitely of the thought that I’d followed the weaning guides, given a good variety of food and it was clearly me being such a great parent that made him eat well. Then along came ds2...

Also my MIL proudly told us that our niece was waking and talking, which was quite shocking as she was well under a year old. Turns out she was babbling and could move her feet if you held her in the air!

The relative I mentioned earlier did this! Claimed her DC was walking at eight months old and that I should do more to encourage DS otherwise he was going to fall further and further behind. Him "walking" was one of them holding him up by his hands and moving forwards whenever he made a stepping motion. Even now they claim he was walking at eight months.

DS was the proverbial child who potty trained himself at 2yo by removing his nappy and saying he wouldn't wear one anymore. He had a few accidents here and there over the first few days but was reliably dry and clean within around four days, but he is autistic and got a lot of sensory discomfort from wearing nappies and was also acutely aware of the sensation of needing the toilet. Same relative as above had a massive kick off that I'd done this on purpose to try and make her DC look bad, that he was still in nappies as he was too busy learning new things and exploring to bother himself with such menial tasks as going to the toilet, and reminded us all that he walked at eight months.

That's amazing. My baby was better than yours at 12 weeks in utero.

A boy at my baby group was fully potty trained by 10 months. I mean, he still wore pull ups to bed amd had lots of "accidents" but apart from that, fully toilet trained.

There are a lot of these!

@LolaSmiles

Some people love turning everything into a competition. I ended up in a bizarre competition during pregnancy as I had complications and had to be monitored. Someone I know seemed to think it was a badge of honour that they 'hardly saw' their midwives as if they had a special talent for pregnancy, but then also said it 'must be nice for you to have all those extra scans'. 🙄 I didn't have the mental energy to point out that there is nothing nice about having to regularly check you still have a baby.

I'm having weekly scans due to FGR and someone said the same to me the other day. Closely followed by " Although don't you feel bad about the extra strain you're putting on the NHS when they're already stretched?"