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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Is my partner overcharging my mum for work he has done?

568 replies

Lleeaahh1992 · 14/03/2021 19:33

My mums house was in a state of disrepair and needed plastering painting and lots of old furniture getting rid of her house hadnt had anything done to it for 25 years. My mum isnt in the best of health and is also a carer for my dad who is bed bound.

My partner offered to do the painting and get his dad to help him as his dad is a retired plasterer and painter. My partner isnt a painter but is pretty good at it, but he cant plaster thats why he was getting his dad to help. Anyway it turned out the housing association done the plastering so she only needed some things polyfilling and the house painting. He said he would get his dad anyway as it would be quicker that way.

It was agreed they would be paid £10 per hour each, he said they would probaly be working 10 hour days but if it varied they would only charge for the hours worked.

Anyway my mum waited two months for my partner to start as he kept putting it off but finally started last week and has just finished. The thing thats bothering me is most of the days he has worked, he has finished at a half hour or less so e.g 7.5 hours, 6.5 hours and so on and his dad only worked 3 days out of the 7. He has now said any day that he finished part way through the hour even by 10 minutes he is charging the full hour because thats how it works he says. So altogether he is charging for 6 lots of half hours that he didnt work, and 3 lots of half hours for his dad that his dad didn't work. And he is charging 39 pound for his dads travel for the 3 days he worked. So altogether it is £84 added onto the bill. Im not happy about this because he agreed with my mum he would only charge what they worked and said nothing about travel for his dad .

When iv broached it with him he has told me to keep out of it as he is the one sorting it out and he done some bits an bobs for free a few months ago like dismantling and removing furniture because my mum was struggling. Shall i stand my ground and say this is unfair and was not agreed to or just leave him to it?

OP posts:
raincamepouringdown · 14/03/2021 20:53

Wow.

Your 'D'P is a dishonest dick. And cheating your own mother no less.

Are you going to stay with this prince among men?

Changemaname1 · 14/03/2021 20:58

He’s tight charging in the first place ! Christ my ex ( my dcs dad ) Has done a few bits for my parents over the years since we split and they had to practically force money over and above the cost of materials on him because he just saw it as helping his dc grandparents out

BeardyButton · 14/03/2021 20:59

Here is my first ltb

Wanderlust20 · 14/03/2021 21:01

This happened to me a family member, ended up paying hundreds of pounds. Would have been cheaper to pay a professional as the family member took double the time. Of course, don't expect to get anything for free but to charge family by the hour when you are not a pro is ridiculous!

Christmasfairy2020 · 14/03/2021 21:02

What does he do for a living

Beautiful3 · 14/03/2021 21:02

Its family, he shouldn't be treating her like a client!!! Charging a whole extra hour to compensate for the ten minutes is awful...really awful. He's taking advantage of your poor mum.

Annonymiss123 · 14/03/2021 21:05

Your partner is a prick.

ChrissyPlummer · 14/03/2021 21:07

I’d give him the money myself...as I handed him his belongings on his way out the door. Seriously. £1400, then get rid.

Emmacb82 · 14/03/2021 21:07

Haven’t read all 8 pages but if my husband was to do painting for my mum, he wouldn’t charge a thing. Thats what you do when it’s family isn’t it? I could perhaps understand it a little more if it was his business, but the fact that he’s doing it just because he’s good at it, plus roping his dad in and then charging your poor mum for his dads travel expenses?! Awful behaviour.

1forAll74 · 14/03/2021 21:08

This all sounds a bit sad, within a family situation, and helping your Mum and Dad. We all know that people work to get paid, but in my family, the work would have been done for free, by those who had a bit of expertise in home type jobs. Working out hours and days working for family,is a bit off really.

Chloemol · 14/03/2021 21:08

I find it unbelievable that your partner is charging your mother! Ok I suppose if this was his business and he was doing it instead of other jobs ok if it was mates rates and not charging the extra rounding up the hours

He definitely should not be charging for the half hours he did not work , and if no mention of paying his dads expenses was discussed he cannot claim those either

I would be having serious thoughts about this relationship

gallileofigaro · 14/03/2021 21:09

Firstly speak to your mum. Doesn't matter who has done the work she is being ripped off.

Secondly dump this man. He is not the kind of man with any standards if he's willing to make money out of your family like this.

Alwayswrongneverright · 14/03/2021 21:14

Sorry not read the whole thing as I was getting annoyed. My husband is a self employed painter/decorator. Depending on the job he either chargers per hour or set price per job obviously with a bit of leeway given any surprises. However he would always offer family discount, a massive discount. Your partner/husband is awful

Ringshanks · 14/03/2021 21:14

I am a tradesperson (carpentry and kitchen fitting) and do not ‘round up’ part hours I charge for what I worked. When I employ assistants I pay them for the time they work up to the nearest 15 mins . If he’s calling himself a ‘tradesperson’ and charging as such he should also be declaring his earnings . If he refuses to play fair with your mum I’d remind him that she’d be within her rights to HMRC a call .

VVKills27 · 14/03/2021 21:15

Oh I am sorry, he’s put you in a really horrid position there. I appreciate his dad had to travel but he should have agreed those additional costs beforehand-if not then he has no business claiming for them now. I hope you manage to sort this without upsetting your mum.

rosegoldivy · 14/03/2021 21:16

Get. Him. To. Fuck.

inkstainjetplanes · 14/03/2021 21:17

I wouldn't expect my partner to charge my mum anything for work done.

Mylovelyhorsee · 14/03/2021 21:18

2k sounds like a lot for a job like that. I don’t think normal companies would charge that much. Also he is not a builder so he doesn’t get to charge professional rates as he is not qualified. Would it be his dad bending his ear? Either way this man sounds awful- why in the world are you with him?

Tell your mum, and tell him she’ll
Pay the hours worked as agreed

TheLoveOfMoney · 14/03/2021 21:19

That's disgusting behaviour. I've just had my whole house done, 3 bed semi, professional painter did all rooms, all skirting and window sills and ceilings. All in, including materials was £1800. It took him just over 2 weeks working 5-6 hour days. Your partner should be helping your family not ripping them off. Cover materials yes, throw in some for labour yes, but not £1400! What's his normal job? Does he earn £100 a day at that??

Hiddenmnetter · 14/03/2021 21:20

I had my entire 4-bed house painted by a professional from fresh plaster to finish coat as well as all the skirting and architrave and coving done for £1,000+materials. That included him helping me on the first day lay the floor in the 4th bedroom (I didn't help with the painting). Your DH is charging professional rates for what I highly doubt is a professional finish. £10/hour is cheap, but given how long the job has longed out it's not worth it.

Dita73 · 14/03/2021 21:23

Why the hell are you with this horrible bastard?!

Bloodypunkrockers · 14/03/2021 21:24

Jeez. He sounds like a keeper

That would be the death knell of the relationship for me

fluffysocks89 · 14/03/2021 21:26

If I was your mum I could never feel the same way about him. My dh wouldn’t have dreamt of charging my mum for antything. Meanness is not a nice trait.

SchadenfreudePersonified · 14/03/2021 21:28

The plastering is the expensive part of this type of job - and that was already done.

He's a tosser - he's taking advantage of your mum's ill-health and he should be bloody ashamed of himself!

He should be charging (if he must charge family at all) the agreed £10/hr for the total tinme he worked - not rounding up each day, but totalling all the hour/half-hours up and maybe rounding up the last remaining half hour (though why not round down?). And travelling was never part of the original description.

I couldn't be with a man like this.

Twillow · 14/03/2021 21:28

You know what, painting and decorating is a long job - I do my own now as I once made the mistake of paying someone by the hour. They were at it full on and did a good job too but I couldn't believe how many hours it actually took. So I wouldn't expect him to do it for free. The rounding up is cheeky for sure. I suppose there's two issues - your mum would have had to pay someone else if your partner didn't do it. And did he do a good job, or is it slapdash/amateur at all? Cos he sounds like the kind of person who might do a half-arsed job just for the money with that attitude...and presumably cash in hand no taxes....

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