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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Is my partner overcharging my mum for work he has done?

568 replies

Lleeaahh1992 · 14/03/2021 19:33

My mums house was in a state of disrepair and needed plastering painting and lots of old furniture getting rid of her house hadnt had anything done to it for 25 years. My mum isnt in the best of health and is also a carer for my dad who is bed bound.

My partner offered to do the painting and get his dad to help him as his dad is a retired plasterer and painter. My partner isnt a painter but is pretty good at it, but he cant plaster thats why he was getting his dad to help. Anyway it turned out the housing association done the plastering so she only needed some things polyfilling and the house painting. He said he would get his dad anyway as it would be quicker that way.

It was agreed they would be paid £10 per hour each, he said they would probaly be working 10 hour days but if it varied they would only charge for the hours worked.

Anyway my mum waited two months for my partner to start as he kept putting it off but finally started last week and has just finished. The thing thats bothering me is most of the days he has worked, he has finished at a half hour or less so e.g 7.5 hours, 6.5 hours and so on and his dad only worked 3 days out of the 7. He has now said any day that he finished part way through the hour even by 10 minutes he is charging the full hour because thats how it works he says. So altogether he is charging for 6 lots of half hours that he didnt work, and 3 lots of half hours for his dad that his dad didn't work. And he is charging 39 pound for his dads travel for the 3 days he worked. So altogether it is £84 added onto the bill. Im not happy about this because he agreed with my mum he would only charge what they worked and said nothing about travel for his dad .

When iv broached it with him he has told me to keep out of it as he is the one sorting it out and he done some bits an bobs for free a few months ago like dismantling and removing furniture because my mum was struggling. Shall i stand my ground and say this is unfair and was not agreed to or just leave him to it?

OP posts:
JoyOrbison · 14/03/2021 19:34

Um, yes he is.

Pay the hours actually worked, not rounded up, and don't let him do further work.

AfternoonToffee · 14/03/2021 19:37

Does your partner have a business or was this just a favour for which he got paid?

Cloudfrost · 14/03/2021 19:38

Your partner is a CF!

AfternoonToffee · 14/03/2021 19:38

And what did his Dad travel in and how far?

Christmasfairy2020 · 14/03/2021 19:38

He should do it free!

TwoMuchTwoYoung · 14/03/2021 19:38

Wow. I’m shocked anyone would even consider charging their partners mum £10 an hour!
Shame on him.

OhCaptain · 14/03/2021 19:39

Jesus! My DH would never charge my mam for work!

PinkiOcelot · 14/03/2021 19:39

Ahhh that’s awful. Your poor mum. How much is he charging her all together?!

I would be telling him to knock off the travel money as well. That wasn’t agreed.

Lleeaahh1992 · 14/03/2021 19:40

I will just feel guilty towards my mum if i dont say anything and knowingly let him do it. I know it is going to cause issues between me and him if i dont let it drop but im really angry but then at the same time i dont know if i should let it go as he has helped with bits for free a while back.
He told me its normal for tradesmen to charge for the hour even if they only work 10 minutes or half an hour out of it i dont know how true this is. I only started keeping track of the start and finish times as on the first day he done 9 hours and said well i have earned 100 pound upto now as ill just charge for the 10 hour day because i have done loads an i said no you cant do that. So i have kept track since then.

OP posts:
Soubriquet · 14/03/2021 19:40

Yeah he’s ripping her off and he knows it which he’s why he’s telling you so stay out of it

I would tell you mum not to hire him anymore and find someone else

Blackdog19 · 14/03/2021 19:41

Your partner sounds horrible. Imagine how he rips off others if he’s happy to rip of your mum.

Pastnowfuture · 14/03/2021 19:41

The agreement was he would charge only for the hours worked so he has broken that agreement by rounding up. Feels very much like he is taking advantage of your mum.

MooshWoosh · 14/03/2021 19:41

He is being unreasonable... and perhaps a little mean spirited?

Every family is different, but if anything I'd hope my partner would undercharge; "family rates" kind of thing.

Bringing up small jobs from months ago also sounds really petty - surely most people help their family out for the odd hour without charging!

I agree with PP, don't let him do anymore work for your mum as he clearly resents it.

IndecentFeminist · 14/03/2021 19:41

What a nob. Paying for travel as well?

Greenmarmalade · 14/03/2021 19:41

Awful to treat family this way- I’d be livid.

PerfectPenquins · 14/03/2021 19:42

I would fall out big time with my partner if he tried that. Wtf your mum isn't well and yet he is charging her full price, leaving early and rounding up! I have trades men in my family and they've never charged each other for time worked only materials. I'm disgusted tbh.

nursejekyll · 14/03/2021 19:42

Your Mum must not pay any of his Dad’s travel expenses. He is taking advantage and sounds horrible.

AfternoonToffee · 14/03/2021 19:43

Is he a normal tradesman though?

(I'm just trying to correctly place him on the CF scale, hence the questions)

Lleeaahh1992 · 14/03/2021 19:43

No he doesnt have a buisness he is just good at painting thats all. His dad travelled about 8 miles which was a 20 minute train journey then 20 minute bus ride but it cost him 13 pound a day apparently. He says i dont have the right to say what he can and cant charge for as he is the one doing the work but i dont agree with it being my mum.

OP posts:
Whirlwind14 · 14/03/2021 19:44

Absolutely ripping her off! £39 for the dad’s travel?! I certainly wouldn’t be happy!

PhillipPhillop · 14/03/2021 19:46

Why would you want this arsehole for a partner? Cheating your mum out of money and then not allowing you to call him on it?

HollyGoLoudly1 · 14/03/2021 19:47

Yeah this seems off to me. How big is your mum's house? You mention your partner working 7 days and his dad 3 days. 10 days in total seems awfully long for just painting, especially if one is a professional.

Minnie16889 · 14/03/2021 19:49

Your partner is a dickhead.

I could never be with someone who was trying to rip my mum off for money.
You need to back your mum here and stand your ground, of course its down to you weather you let your partner screw her for money.

bert3400 · 14/03/2021 19:49

I honestly can not believe you DH is charging your mum for this work. I would feel ashamed. My DH redesigned my mum's house for her ( he is an architect ) got it though planning and did all the drawing, it equated to £1000s of pounds of work ....he didn't charge her a penny and so he shouldn't. I would never want to be married to someone who thought it acceptable to rip of a family member .

JackieweaverhasALLtheauthority · 14/03/2021 19:49

he is being completely outrageous!

this is SOOOO bad