Is there any woman who hasn’t experienced male harrassment

[Twintub]

I was thinking about this and was initially thinking things have massively improved since I was young in the 80’s. I experienced flashers, a teacher tried to kiss me in high school he was married baby on the way, a pub boss whose girlfriend worked with him tried to kiss and grope me and another middle aged boss in my late 20s that pulled my trousers down at a night away for work. There were many more. Now I’m in my 40s I thought I don’t get bothered much but then I remembered 2 other pre covid instances. One late night train a drunk guy tried to chat to friend she politely said she wasn't interested and he got Aggressive calling her a speccy lesbian. Another instance my friend and I in a pub and a middle aged drunk man obviously on a business trip chatted up my friend she wasn’t interested I very nicely said we are just having a chat he turned on me and called me an ugly bitch He wasn’t talk h to me and I wasn’t a patch on her etc etc his work mates dragged him away.

What amazes me is men behave like this bit raise daughters who in turn get treated like this.

35 and consider myself 'lucky' to have only experienced non-physical harassment (i.e. verbal; a flasher) Isn't that ridiculous?

Saddens me and enrages me in equal measure to hear all these stories

I have, multiple times. I was really worried once abs went into my corner shop and said to the owner- someone's following me I just want to stay in here a moment and he walked me home. We got out of the shop and the guy was waiting for me. It was so scary and I'm so grateful for that man for walking me home. I've been followed/harassed a load of different times but that one I really felt scared

No. I’ve been harassed and assaulted on a number of occasions and so have the majority of my friends. I have now learned to protect myself more effectively. But shouldn’t have had to!

One of my friends claims to have never been harassed or sexually assaulted. She wonders if there’s something wrong with her because she feels she is in a tiny minority. I agree she’s in a minority but I put it down to her being a very sensible person with good taste in men who chooses friends well. Also she’s into a hobby which mostly attracts gay men so her social group doesn’t include that many straight men.

I woke up the morning after a party to find an uninvited hand in my pants playing with my genitals. It is likely that a far more serious crime could have taken place minutes later if I hadn't woken up and responded by giving him a hard kick in the face.

At 7, as a new girl at school, I was caught by the class bully and his friends at the end of the school day. Pinned down on my hands and knees while my skirt was lifted up and pants pulled down. Fortunately DM caught him and threatened to set the dog on him if he ever touched me again.

At 11/12, I was pinned down on the classroom floor and "kissed" by a classmate while the teacher left the room for a couple of minutes.

The usual can't take no for an answer in bars and night clubs.

Fortunately not much attention on the street. A benefit of trail running is that I'm spared the attention of white van men.

I didn't report the hand in pants assault because of the what was she wearing/ doing culture. We need to break that blame on women for being in the wrong place at the wrong time in the wrong clothes, on their own, having hair in ponytails etc. Men need to listen and change masculine culture and pull their peers up when they are past the boundaries of civilised behaviour. Women can not change this situation, we already give too much, men have to be willing to change too.

No is the short answer. From the age of about 11 onwards in various forms. And I’m gay which has lent me some protection as I spend a lot less time around straight men in general, went to gay bars and clubs etc way more than straight ones so have come into less contact with drunk blokes in particular. But if I started to add it all up,
Literally innumerable. One plus side to getting past 40 has been the lack of unwanted attention from a lot of men though, absolutely blessing.

The worst experiences in my life: physical abuse, emotional abuse, sexual threats, abuse of power, have all come from police officers (including a Met officer). Utterly depressing.

I made a comment about my experiences only,
No need to try to put words in my mouth.

@HaNNaHC92

I'm 28 and have not experienced male harassment or even come close to. There's obviously a lot of women out there who have been, but I think the numbers are exaggerated and are still small compared to those who have not been.

Typical. Just because it hasn't happened to you, you think (no facts) the numbers are exaggerated? 😑

I don't know ANY woman who hasn't experienced it.

I'm in my 40s. and I haven't.
I have had wolf whistles in the past or maybe passing comments but I haven't seen them as harassment.
Not negating anyone who has had harassment, just saying how it is for me personally seeing as the OP asked.

Aged 49 here and I've experienced sexual abuse (As a child), been followed, harassed, stalked, unwanted attention by so called male friends... the list goes on. I HATE having a daughter at times as it is my biggest fear she will go through the same.

I'm amazed there are women on this thread that say they haven't experienced any form of inappropriate behaviour from men. I've had so many incidents throughout my life.

I used to get beeped and cat-called from the age of 12 (even in school uniform) on a regular basis, and I wasn't particularly well developed either. Had numerous men in clubs/bars grope me, put their hands up my skirt, someone upskirted me with their phone taking a video.I had a random man try to drag me into a taxi on a night out. Then there was a drunk man on a busy bus full of people shout out that I had a "fuckable arse" as I was waiting at the front to disembark. Also, men rubbing their leg against mine on buses. A friend of a friend tried to rape me at a house party, but I bit his fave/cheek hard and screamed, which made him run out of the house. Similar to another poster, I also had an experience with a predatory doctor. He told me i was a beautiful girl and he liked my pubic hair! He also, touched my knee and embraced me in a hug when I was leaving. I've been flashed twice when on my own and had a 14 year old boy masturbate at me in a busy underpass at 5PM on a summer evening on my way home from work (I reported it and he was arrested and given a caution). *I've been harassed at work a number of times and twice it went to management. I was lucky that both of those times it was taken seriously and the culprits were given warnings. Both times it never happened again.

These are just the incidents I can think of off the top of my head. There's been many more.

Your OP could read, "Is there any woman who couldn't write a book about the harassment she's experienced".

The "me too" movement was a very difficult time for me; I realized how much abuse I'd experienced at the hands of men and had minimised it because it was so frequent it seemed normal. This includes two attempted rapes which were terrifying and quite violent but because I wasn't actually raped I thought I was lucky.

So many incidents of inappropriate comments, groping, sexual assault, verbal abuse, being chased, hiding for safety, flashing etc. Is there a woman alive who hasn't been called a fucking ugly cunt (or similar) when she's rejected a man's advances?

Like most women, I have never reported any of it to the police.

I'm in my 40s and I can't think of anything, beyond banter that was easily stopped with a no or f. Off from being a teenager up.
I wouldn't say I was overly careful, I regularly walked 13 miles home, drunk after a night out. Left my friends to go to different clubs on my own and had a few too many fights.
I can remember finding safe places for my phone and keys incase I was mugged at night walking in some less friendly areas of Glasgow but that was rare. I have had the slight panic feeling when someone is behind me but mainly when a group of teens.
As a young child I have a memory from being about 3/4 and my friend and I playing a few mins away from our houses and some man trying to take us somewhere and us screaming and running away. However this might have been a dream. One time a man grabbed my horse when I was riding alone, I wouod have been 12/13 my horse and I were both quick to anger so he let go soon enough. Never really knew what he wanted as we were rural, def not his land and I was allowed to ride there but he kept saying I was wrong and had to go with him? 🤔 More likely to have escaped from the local hospital, they had a lot of escapers in those days.

Endless examples. Raped as a child. Assaulted by a doctor. Cat called. Spat at and threatened when I rejected a man's advances. I've told dd to be rude to men, keep your bag on the seat next to you on public transport, headphones in and ignore any man who asks you to move your bags. Tell him to fuck off peado if you have to. It's bloody awful.
Dd was followed by a man and when I reported it to the police, they tried victim blaming (surprise). If the law who is supposed to protect the victims gets victim blaming what hope is there?

a lot of the posts on here are almost as if it is expected or normal behaviour and it was reminded of watching the tv program about 'grabbing' and the girls were so accepting saying it was their tradition and thinking it was absolutely shocking.
In a previous life decades ago i worked at corporate hospitality events and drunk businessmen (and women!!!) would be very inappropriate and we just got used to it , some of us would give as good as we got back or join in and see it as harmless, so i guess some of us oldies are responsible for not addressing it sooner.

Well it was the age of Benny Hill and the Like so we absolutely normalised it

So many times that I’m embarrassed to say that I’ve started to minimise it. I was so ashamed of myself when I caught myself thinking “is that all?” when I heard the details of Christine Blasey Ford’s allegations about Kavanaugh.

I’m astonished to see that there are women on this thread saying they haven’t been, and I can assure you that avoiding harassment has nothing to do with plain clothes, wisely-chosen friends or being a quiet personality.

Aged 31. Countless examples of verbal harassment and aggression, sexual assault (luckily none traumatising), beginning at approx age 12. My friends and I have always spoken about this and I have never had a single female friend it has not happened to.

'In a previous life decades ago i worked at corporate hospitality events and drunk businessmen (and women!!!) would be very inappropriate and we just got used to it , some of us would give as good as we got back or join in and see it as harmless, so i guess some of us oldies are responsible for not addressing it sooner.'

That reminded me- I had a small taste of that at a city Oktoberfest event.

I was there with clients. However I had blonde hair and was fairly young.

As such I was seen by a large contingent of the majority male guests as part of the 'entertainment'. It was awful!

I really felt for the women in durndels taking beer around. A lot of the men clearly thought that they were not simply there to give beer but to ogle, comment on, try to grab etc etc

And no one set them straight. There was that thing in the news a year or 2 ago about some do where the men understood the pretty young women bringing drinks were there to harass.

Just made me think. A lot of men then- normal men nice men- do have this idea that in certain circs women are part of the offering, as it were.

@Twintub

Well it was the age of Benny Hill and the Like so we absolutely normalised it

Yup it was just “banter” and “a bit of fun”. But when you look back on it as an older adult it bloody well was sexual harassment.

Honestly it's one of the reasons I stay overweight and don't bother with my appearance (no makeup etc) - I get lot less bother from men. I've always been very uncomfortable with male attention anyway but I've had plenty of sexual harassment/assault etc happen to me so I much prefer to be invisible. I'm in my 40s and a friend said to me she is worried about aging and becoming invisible to men and I thought "Why?!" - sounds fantastic to me!

I am loving being in the age of invisibility! It's so nice.

The lengths girls go to, and women too, to avoid the male gaze is so damaging.

We're supposed to look 'nice' but if we do, obviously men will do whatever!

If you don't look 'nice' then you get other sorts of shit.

When I was a girl loads wore baggy clothes to disguise their bodies and avoid it.

It's a lose lose really.

@juice92

Although it is fair to say there is the odd woman who has not experienced direct sexual harassment (very few and far in between) every single woman feels the impact of it.

If you have ever pretended to take a phonecall in the hope you won't be shouted at in the street, ran all the way home after a night out, pretended to look in your bag to avoid eye contact, not put your headphones in so you can hear who is coming up behind you, had to tell someone a man in your life no multiple times etc etc

Then you have been a victim of sexual harassment even if that was indirectly.

This exactly ^^ Those who haven't been harrassed are definitely in the minority and lucky and I personally have heard people minimise others harrassment like its not a big deal. Yes people may look at things differently but surely all woman would want is just to be respected and left alone when it's clear she doesn't appreciate that attention and to be listened to seriously when it's talked about.