Too Many Men

[JackieBeaver]

I'm feeling very sad about the Sarah Everard case. Poor poor woman. There's a lot of stories coming out now from women who have experienced feeling unsafe due to the behaviour of men with the hashtag toomanymen trending on Twitter and Green Party peer baroness Jones calling for a 6pm curfew of all men.

We need a change! This can't go on, I'm so tired of feeling unsafe and unable to go about my business without fearing for my safety. I'm worried for my dd also

Enough is enough

There was A LOT about Rochdale, MN is one of the few places I see violence against women and girls discussed regularly.

ghostyslovesheets - You know what statistically lies ahead of them at the hands of men?
Does this also mean their father is a threat to them?

My F sexually abused my DSis and me, so yes, men can be a threat to their daughters. It’s also impossible to know which men are abusers; my DM had no idea and thought he was a wonderful father.

[quote zigzog44]@Naunet - Your misandry is very obvious. Do you feel the same about males in your family? Would you also fear a son, or grandson and see them as a potential threat to you, just because they were born male?[/quote]
I didn't fear my grandfather or my cousin. I definitely should've. Learned that lesson the hard way.

“Discrimination of all kinds would be lessened”
Er yes except for keeping half the population locked up 🤦🏻‍♀️

Attention seeking moron

Beyond stupid.

A man kills a woman, so someone suggests men are curfewed. Would that include the policeMEN keeping everyone safe? Or the ambulanceMEN or male doctors working all night to save lives?

Two sons here, sick of the anti male mood on MN.

Dogs occasionally bite people. Let’s put them all down, sick of NADALT!

Making the assumption that all men are likely to be a threat to women and need to be locked up at night is divisive and frankly offensive.

Well this is regularly the advice given to women and girls.

This.
I was first harrassed by a male, his age about 40 or 50, before I knew what he wanted from me, at age 8 or 9. I was first followed at 11; by the age of 13 I had learned it was a regular risk. I am sick of men - and male defenders - getting annoyed and defensive about women and girls being fed up. If it was men being harassed on a daily basis war would have been declared.
At the very least there should be a regular curfew once a year, on what is currently a tick-box "International Women's Day". Perhaps we should have a separate women's police force to manage it.

Why on earth would this thread need to be pulled?
Because it might hurt some men's feelings?!

30 women, THIS YEAR so far, that have been killed by men or a man is the primary suspect. 30.

I think considering it is only March it should be okay to say women are scared of being killed by a man.
We can't tell the good ones form the bad ones. (And some of the good ones are only 'good' because they stop short of actually killing a woman)

@Naunet

* No, I'm not mocking women. I have been beaten senseless by an ex and almost died one night, I have been groped and I have other things done to me that I don't want to mention but I won't accept people saying that all men are the same. I can raise my son to be like his father, the most calm and kind person (not man) I have ever known. Unless my son turns out to be ill or evil in a way that we couldn't help or prevent, I trust that he will grow up to be the way that I and his father want him to be; respectful of everyone, regardless of sex*

Great, so then why get so defensive on behalf of men when women are talking about their experiences and saying that something needs to change? We all know it’s not all men, we hear it constantly, but it’s still far, far too many.

Talking about their experiences? I've only been defensive of men in regards to them all being punished for the actions of others and nothing else. I thank you not put words in my mouth.

Something does need to change and I said as much. I also said I don't know what we can possibly do to fix it.
Harsher sentences are definitely needed and I would think educating boys when they are still very young would have some effect, but short of getting rid of all men and by default, humankind, I don't think it can ever be fixed.

Its something we've spoken about at home as my OH won't stop to help a woman/women in difficulty. His view being they should have a phone and called for help or wait for another woman to assist, better that than they be approached by a strange man

Wow. Does he honestly think that a man attacking a woman will stand by politely while she calls the police, and that the police will get there in time to prevent her being seriously harmed?

If I was being attacked, I wouldn't care who came to help, as long as someone did. And it's perfectly possible to stand a few feet away and ask if someone needs help.

My late DP pulled up because he saw a woman being manhandled at a bus stop one night. As soon as he called out and asked if she needed help, the man attacking her legged it. And if he was walking at night and encountered a woman walking alone, he would always cross over, to avoid being on the same side of the road and possibly making her fearful.

I trained him well.

There is so much conflict in the world - instead of pitting ourselves against each other in this way, why don't we work together for change?
This, from @bjjgirl: The key to change is education and parenting, raising our children well.

The not all men brigade do need to learn to apply simple math.
We know the stats for sexual assault and rape.
Is there just one, reeeally busy dude running around doing all this assaulting and raping?

Answers on a postcard, please.

I have sons. Their father is an abusive misogynist, and so is his father, and actually his mother too. They think they are pacifist feminist, and talk that talk, but my Word are they violent people. My boys have a lot of input from me, but I can never be sure they will not find abusive behaviour acceptable and dress it up nicely for themselves.

I have a father and husband and brothers and friends that are wonderful, but I know plenty of their aquintances and many of my colleagues are «questionable» to say the least.

@WhereverIlaymyhat2021, you know what I have two teens ds.
I’ve raised them the best I couod teaching them to be respectful. I’ve tried to teach them about misogyny and how women feel in danger all the time. I’ve talked about rape and how frightened women are.

I’ve raised two very nice men (or nearly men). They are also misogynistic and prone to go ‘what about men??’
For the simple reason that they have been raised in a society that is matriarchal and sexist. And the idea that all their female friends have been in the receiving of sexual harassement is very uncomfortable to them.

So yay I get how it sounds horrible to say that about all men. But Unfortunately , your dcs, just like mines will also have that attitude unless there is a massive shift. And that shift isn’t going to happen by saying to men ‘oh but it’s not you, you are great/nit sexist/not a risk to us’

Honestly this thread is so offensive I have two beautiful toddler sons and some of these posts are making me feel like you would like me to drown them in the bath tonight. I’m not joking. I’m shaking reading some of the things on here

Well the rape and murder of women is FAR more offensive. Get some perspective.

There was a program on netflix about the Yorkshire ripper. At that time they put in a cerfew for women to protect them..... So what the person from green party said was maybe a call back to that... Maybe man should have a cerfew... Well that's what I thought of when read that.

Harsher sentences are definitely needed and I would think educating boys when they are still very young would have some effect, but short of getting rid of all men and by default, humankind, I don't think it can ever be fixed.

For those of us who are living with learned helplessness in the face of such evil, perhaps it's helpful that there are other people who are willing to consider mitigations and strategic ways to reduce the violence short of having women live under an unofficial and unacknowledged curfew.

I would just like to point out that as the mother of a son I don't think anyone here wants to drown him.

It's an awful thought but in all honesty I'm more worried about him at the hands of certain men than I am about myself. I also worry about his future, i want him to be a good man, to be respectful but I'm not his only influence.

I don't mean to undermine the trauma caused by male violence btw, and I do think we should have a Domestic Violence Offender list as well as a Sex offender one.

I went on the Reclaim the Night march in the 1970s, and years ago I did a straw poll among all my friends to find out how many of us had been victims of male violence - sexual or otherwise. Only 1 out of about 30 women had never suffered it.

@WhereverIlaymyhat2021

Honestly this thread is so offensive I have two beautiful toddler sons and some of these posts are making me feel like you would like me to drown them in the bath tonight. I’m not joking. I’m shaking reading some of the things on here.

I have a beautiful son too and I think you need to get a bloody grip.

As a feller, I am quite happy to say the following:

The guys bleating about 'all men' being vilified are either grossly hard of thinking, or (more likely) being wilful pricks.

No-one with two brain cells to rub together believes for a second that a curfew on men is being suggested as a serious proposition. It is very obviously something being said as a talking point, to get a reaction, to underline we should not be penalising women for men's behaviour.

A man who jumps onto a thread like this in the first few posts, against the background of the last few days' news, and instead of asking what we can do to better support women, decides to whinge about being vilified, is, simply put, a cunt.

@TheReluctantPhoenix it was suggessted in response to the police telling women to stay home and not go out. She was making a political point and the way people like you have reacted proves her point very succinctly: people find the idea of men's liberties being denied them outrageous in a way that they simply don't when it comes to women.

Anti-male mood on MN? Why? Because women are speaking up about male violence? Shame for men, though I'm sure all women here can sympathise, considering the entire world is anti-female.

DH is the kindest gentlest man I know. He was driving the work van the other day, and saw a young mum with a pushchair who was walking in an absolute downpour and the pram didn't have a raincover. His instinct was to stop and help, he could have let her stand in the back of the van with her pram but he said he stopped himself, because he was worried about being reported for trying to accost her.

It's a sad world when men can't be thoughtful to strangers who happen to be women.

Works both ways.