AIBU to say ‘no vaccine, no seeing grandchildren’ to my anti vaccine in laws?

[Hfjshdhs]

Name changed because I’m sure that IABU and I’m a bit scared of the fallout!

My PIL are anti vaccine, conspiracy theorists (don’t think Covid exists). They are refusing to get the vaccine.

I have a 3 year old and 5 month old. The 3 year old goes to nursery, but other than that we are incredibly careful and follow all rules. My 5 month old hasn’t met anyone because we are staying safe. None of us are CEV, but equally we have friends who are healthy, have had covid, and had a really awful time of it. So we really don’t want Covid in the house.

AIBU to say to my in laws that if they don’t have the vaccine, I won’t see them, and they won’t be seeing the grandchildren? Or is that a really shitty thing to do?

For context, I have never got on with them. They are extremely controlling. My husband has a very poor relationship with them. But our daughter loves her grandparents so we make sure they have a good relationship. My PIL are both still working, in offices, so exposed every day. If I see my PIL I don’t think I could see my own parents in the following two weeks because they are vulnerable (though have been vaccinated).

Hfjshdhs
My PIL ...don’t think Covid exists.

This always makes me wonder what sort of mind is involved. Do they also think that cholera, measles, influenza, rubella, tuberculosis, typhoid, pneumonia, hepatitis or the common cold do not exist? The evidence seems to be human beings suffer from all of these, and from Covid too: more than a hundred and twenty thousand people in this country having died of Covid makes it seem likely that it isn't just a rumour or a myth.

I suppose if they were devout Christian Scientists they might believe that all illness is illusion, but short of that, what a cockeyed view of life!

But you will have no guarantee that people your children interact with will be vaccinated.
Obviously you have other reasons but don’t forget some can’t or won’t get immunized.

@AskingQuestionsAllTheTime

This always makes me wonder what sort of mind is involved. Do they also think that cholera, measles, influenza, rubella, tuberculosis, typhoid, pneumonia, hepatitis or the common cold do not exist? The evidence seems to be human beings suffer from all of these, and from Covid too: more than a hundred and twenty thousand people in this country having died of Covid makes it seem likely that it isn't just a rumour or a myth.

I think some people are just very dim... They must be to deny covid19 exists, (even after ALL the deaths, and the 100s of1000s of cases,) and to refuse the brilliant vaccine that so many scientists have worked so hard to create.

I see some collective benefits of course to the vaccine however I will still research it based on my personal situation and make the choice I feel is right for me based on the data and my own risk factors.

Genuine question - where do you look when you do your research? I wouldn’t know where to start trying to find out unbiased, peer-reviewed, accessible information about this vaccine. And I have a PhD in a STEM subject.

@LockdownIsDrivingMeMad STOP spouting such utter, UTTER nonsense. FFS!

@peardrops1

People (generally anti-vaxxers) often remind everyone that refusing the vaccine is a 'personal choice'. This is true. But it's also a very selfish personal choice. We all have a duty to the people around us. The more people are vaccinated, the lower the transmission rate (as the emerging evidence suggests), the better the chances of suppressing the virus, and the lower the likelihood of new, vaccine-resistant variants emerging. Besides this, being vaccinated doesn't offer complete protection to the most vulnerable, so people around them should be doing their bit to reduce risk of transmission too. Finally, some people are vulnerable but can't get the vaccine for medical reasons (allergies, pregnancy etc). The rest of society needs to be vaccinated in order to protect those people.

So in conclusion, YANBU. Their choice to refuse the vaccine, but your choice to respond in a way you feel is appropriate. They get to make the decision to risk themselves; they don't get to make the decision to risk other people.

Why are we not allowed to make personal choices anymore without being deemed selfish? Many people get in their car and don’t consider that emissions are killing the environment and causing health problems. Many, many people get killed or seriously injured from rta’s every year but we don’t demonise people for driving do we!

‘How comes we don't see people randomly dropping in the street if it is so deadly?

I'm not anti vax but I'm anti stupidity.’

The irony!

LockdownIsDrivingMeMad
Covid is not as deadly as is being hyped up over mainstream media.
Flu kills a lot more people, it's a higher percentage, as many doctors have said.

The highest number of weekly deaths from influenza in the 2018 to 2019 period occurred in week 1 of 2019, with 816 deaths.

We don't yet have the figures for 2020, but if you multiply that highest number by 52 you get 42,432 -- and that is too high, because that was the week with the most deaths in that year.

That's a lot fewer than the well over 100,000 covid deaths we had in a year.

Why are we not allowed to make personal choices anymore without being deemed selfish?

Because you will benefit from everyone else around you getting the vaccine and keeping YOU safe. You should be doing your part to help vulnerable people who CAN'T get the vaccine.

Actually, it's better than that:

2015: All causes 528,507; Influenza and Pneumonia 29,847; Influenza 282; Pneumonia 29,565
2016: All causes 523,857; Influenza and Pneumonia 27,464; Influenza 427; Pneumonia 27,037
2017: All causes 532,130; Influenza and Pneumonia 27,595; Influenza 458; Pneumonia 27,137
2018: All causes 540,265; Influenza and Pneumonia 29,451; Influenza 1,596; Pneumonia 27,855
2019: All causes 529,553; Influenza and Pneumonia 26,342; Influenza 1,213: Pneumonia 25,129

Why are we not allowed to make personal choices anymore without being deemed selfish?

Because herd immunity only works if enough of the population is vaccinated.

And herd immunity is required to keep vulnerable members of a community safe, for example, those who can’t get vaccinated (e.g. babies because they’re too young) or those who are immuno-compromised (e.g. cancer patients under-going chemotherapy, etc).

Most decent people care about those groups of people.

I think people who really want this vaccine, should go for it and deal with the reactions, later, its their choice.
But they should not be telling others they are selfish etc if they choose not to.

That is also their choice.

I wonder if they will delete this comment too

Wait until you get your own vaccines.
Then they can see your kids as you normally would.
You cannot force others into getting vaccines.

@LockdownIsDrivingMeMad

I think people who really want this vaccine, should go for it and deal with the reactions, later, its their choice. But they should not be telling others they are selfish etc if they choose not to.

That is also their choice.

I wonder if they will delete this comment too

🙄

The benefits off the vacancie are to protect the person who has it

The benefit of the vaccine is to protect everyone. The more people who have it, the better vaccination works.

Reading some of the uneducated posts on here make me despair. Are you not all sick of Covid? Do you want another year of lockdown?

Of course people refusing the vaccine are being selfish. The lesser the take up, the longer we'll be living under restrictions.

YANBU, I really enjoyed removing the anti-vaxxer posters outside our local vaccination centre.

They reap what they sow. They’re selfish because they’re relying on everyone else to have the vaccine to keep them safe.

@LockdownIsDrivingMeMad

I think people who really want this vaccine, should go for it and deal with the reactions, later, its their choice. But they should not be telling others they are selfish etc if they choose not to.

That is also their choice.

I wonder if they will delete this comment too

But you are being selfish. Vaccination works better the more people who have the vaccine. That’s the way vaccination protects us. There will always people who can’t have vaccines, usually due to a compromised immune system. By taking your vaccination you are helping to protect those more vulnerable than you.

After that twat Wakefield declared a link between autism and the MMR, vaccination take up dropped with serious results, particularly with measles. We had an outbreak which killed children and permanently damaged others.

Given the uncertainty around mutant versions, I wouldn’t be seeing them even after you’ve had the vaccine.

@LockdownIsDrivingMeMad

I think people who really want this vaccine, should go for it and deal with the reactions, later, its their choice. But they should not be telling others they are selfish etc if they choose not to.

That is also their choice.

I wonder if they will delete this comment too

I expect it was the inaccuracy that got the previous post deleted.

Inaccuracy was what I posted about, in reply to it.

@LockdownIsDrivingMeMad

I think people who really want this vaccine, should go for it and deal with the reactions, later, its their choice. But they should not be telling others they are selfish etc if they choose not to.

That is also their choice.

I wonder if they will delete this comment too

Your post was deleted because it was evidence-free scaremongering.

Blackmailing your in laws? Goady much?

It’s not blackmailing to what to want to protect yourself and your children, Sakura

If you’re vaxed
I can’t see a problem