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Original poster

Was it my fault and do I replace them?

212 replies

Sexnotgender · 01/03/2021 15:57

I do all the washing.

I repeatedly tell people to empty their pockets. DD17 didn’t take her apple headphones out and obviously they went through the wash.

Waiting to see if they still work once they dry out.

Should I have double checked? And should I replace them?

OP posts:
Bluntness100 · 01/03/2021 18:04

Mistakes happen with the wash, we all do it. As she reacted well and is having a tough time, I’d see if I can make them work. If not I’d tell her now I will replace them as a gift to her

We all deserve a little kindness sometimes.

MsFogi · 01/03/2021 18:05

She should now have learnt the lesson about emptying her pockets and not expecting her mother to do so for her.

Viviennemary · 01/03/2021 18:10

Her own fault. Offer to go half as a goodwill gesture. Unless she makes a fuss and in that case don't offer anything.

Bluntness100 · 01/03/2021 18:14

@MsFogi

She should now have learnt the lesson about emptying her pockets and not expecting her mother to do so for her.
Wow

Some harsh responses on here. I’m fifty two, my husband 55. Sometimes I leave something in my pockets. As does he. Everyone does.

It’s twenty quid. She’s not done it before. She didn’t kick off. Her mother being kind to her and replacing them as a gift when she’s having a hard time is a nice thing to do

Not everything needs to be a life lesson. Sometimes we make mistakes, and sometimes other peoole can help us out.

Muchtoomuchtodo · 01/03/2021 18:16

I reckon they’ll work - DS’s so and they’ve suffered the same fate!

If not I’d offer to go halves with her. And both start checking pockets before things go in the wash!

ChameleonClara · 01/03/2021 18:18

This is not your fault.

It doesn't matter whether you pay or she does IMO - but it is definitely not your fault.

speakout · 01/03/2021 18:20

*Wow

Some harsh responses on here. I’m fifty two, my husband 55. Sometimes I leave something in my pockets. As does he. Everyone does.

It’s twenty quid. She’s not done it before. She didn’t kick off. Her mother being kind to her and replacing them as a gift when she’s having a hard time is a nice thing to do

Not everything needs to be a life lesson. Sometimes we make mistakes, and sometimes other peoole can help us out.*

Agreed,

Covert19 · 01/03/2021 18:21

You shouldn't take the blame for this, but it's nice to let your kids know that they are covered by "Direct Mum Insurance" when they're disappointed about losing something.

sonjadog · 01/03/2021 18:23

I would buy her new ones. She hasn't tried to blame you and is having a hard time. She is only 17. I would treat her this time.

BluebellsGreenbells · 01/03/2021 18:26

I’ve washed those a few times

They’ve worked after wards !

Quite impressed

iwishiwasatcentralperk · 01/03/2021 18:26

They should be covered by your house insurance , so you could make a claim and ask her to pay the excess, or pay it yourself if you are feeling generous.

Bluntness100 · 01/03/2021 18:26

@speakout, I know, right? I just find it so cold. Yout kids make a mistake, well fuck them, they are on their own, not your problem, learn the lesson.

We all make mistakes, doesn’t matter how old we are. And sometimes it’s nice to know someone has your back and is kind to us.

This isn’t a 17 year old who does it all the time. This isn’t a 17 year old who kicked off and demanded, this is a 17 year old who made a mistake and took it on the chin.

As said, not everything needs to be a bloody life lesson.

Original poster
Sexnotgender · 01/03/2021 18:29

[quote gingeristhenewblack43]@Sexnotgender if they are the headphones that come with an older iphone I'm happy to bung an unused pair in the post for your daughter.

No one's perfect, mistakes are easily made. If they were the airpods then as a parent no I wouldn't pay to replace them for my DD.[/quote]
You’re very kind and the second person to offer!

Nest of vipers my assFlowers

I will graciously decline though.

OP posts:
speakout · 01/03/2021 18:30

Bluntness100

Absolutely.

We are human.
I fuck up sometimes too.
Usually a tissue- which then disintegrates and sticks to the whole wash. And I like to think I am pretty careful.
Some kindness is a good thing to have within a family.

Bloodypunkrockers · 01/03/2021 18:30

Totally not your fault

I know though if it was my DD I'd tell her it serves her right but buy her a new pair anyway

GnomeDePlume · 01/03/2021 18:32

I would replace them. Not because I have to but because it is a small thing which could brighten up an otherwise 'that's another thing' kind of day.

UserAgain · 01/03/2021 18:35

No one has said that this also presumably depends on how much money the DD has access to. If she has a part time job and is reasonably well off, then fine, ask her to pay £19. However that would be a huge sum of money for my teens, and leave them with practically nothing for the month not that there is anything much to spend it on at the moment so I might ask for a donation, but I'd probably replace them. The comments on here about "that's not very much" do reflect that some people forget that not every family has their lifestyle.

Bluntness100 · 01/03/2021 18:37

Some kindness is a good thing to have within a family

Exactly.

You see stories of random kindness. Someone steps in and pays for someone’s shopping, someone stops and helps someone who needs it. Kindness is a good thing and what we should be teaching our children. No matter how old they are. Leading by example.

So many people can’t be kind to their own children. And actively encourage others not to be kind to theirs either.

It explains why some people grow up to behave in totally selfish ways and wouldn’t spit on someone if they were on fire.

harknesswitch · 01/03/2021 18:37

You didn't ruin them, she did

user1492809438 · 01/03/2021 18:39

Put them in a jiffy bag with some rice, seal and leave for a couple of days. I rescued my son's airpods that way.

Cloudbeeb · 01/03/2021 18:39

You sound lovely OP, and so does your DD to have taken it graciously. As you say you can easily afford to replace them I would, but make it clear that she needs to remember to check her pockets!

Original poster
Sexnotgender · 01/03/2021 18:41

@UserAgain

No one has said that this also presumably depends on how much money the DD has access to. If she has a part time job and is reasonably well off, then fine, ask her to pay £19. However that would be a huge sum of money for my teens, and leave them with practically nothing for the month not that there is anything much to spend it on at the moment so I might ask for a donation, but I'd probably replace them. The comments on here about "that's not very much" do reflect that some people forget that not every family has their lifestyle.
She doesn’t have a job. She’s on the shielding list so can’t unfortunately. £19 is a LOT of money to her.
OP posts:
StuntNun · 01/03/2021 18:42

Get her to buy a tempered glass screen protector for her phone, and one for the back as well if it's a newer model with a glass back. My DCs' devices have survived numerous blows and being dropped thanks to screen protectors. The screen protector breaks but it usually absorbs enough of the blow that the screen itself is okay.

SpringersLoveSofas · 01/03/2021 18:45

My mum would have bought me new ones. Not because she had to, because she wanted to.

I love her very much for that. I didn't grow up to be some ungrateful brat. In fact, I grew up to be the kind of daughter who replaced her much loved k-mix mixer when she broke it. Because I could afford to, she couldn't and breaking it upset her.

Original poster
Sexnotgender · 01/03/2021 18:48

My mum would have bought me new ones. Not because she had to, because she wanted to.

I’m swaying towards replacing them if they don’t work.

Plenty of people on here seem to have done the same and they’ve survived though so maybe we’ll be lucky.

OP posts: