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Original poster

Was it my fault and do I replace them?

212 replies

Sexnotgender · 01/03/2021 15:57

I do all the washing.

I repeatedly tell people to empty their pockets. DD17 didn’t take her apple headphones out and obviously they went through the wash.

Waiting to see if they still work once they dry out.

Should I have double checked? And should I replace them?

OP posts:
Tal45 · 01/03/2021 16:14

If she's having a hard time and they're £30 I'd get her some more without telling her and give them to her as a surprise present and tell her to make sure she really looks after them this time. If she'd tried to blame you or didn't seem to care or they cost £100 then I wouldn't. She seems like a good kid having a bad time so if I could afford it I'd replace them for her x

MixedUpFiles · 01/03/2021 16:15

I do not check pockets.

I do not look for stains.
I do not sort.
Nothing belongs in the hamper that isn’t ready to be washed.

If I am nice enough to run your laundry, it must be totally prepared for washing and sorted into the proper bin. There is stain treater on top of the washer. There are separate bins for whites, colors, and darks. There are bags for your delicates.

MuddleMoo · 01/03/2021 16:17

No you shouldn't replace them. If you can and feel like it then maybe after a week or so if no moaning about it and demands for you to buy new ones then you could offer to get some for next birthday?

MuddleMoo · 01/03/2021 16:18

Or after a couple of weeks just buy them if you feel like it.

Queenfreak · 01/03/2021 16:19

For £19 I would probably replace them. Like you said- shes taken responsibility and not laid it on you, no she is having a hard time.

Loopyloututu2 · 01/03/2021 16:20

I replaced my ds’s (grudgingly) when it happened last week, however I’ve now told them that they have to go on the assumption that anything put in the wash basket won’t be checked by me.
It happened again yesterday (I won’t be replacing these ones)Angry
They need to learn to be responsible for their own stuff (I actually do always check pockets and don’t even know how they bloody got in there!)

Clymene · 01/03/2021 16:20

@Sexnotgender

In what world is a £100+ pair if headphones 'not that expensive' to a 17 year old?

They’re regular wired apple headphones not AirPods. I think they’re about £30 or so?

Oh! Ignore me then! For £19 I'd probably fork out but in a 'this is not admitting responsibility but just because life is a bit shit' way
Peachylovesherpoochy · 01/03/2021 16:20

You could try putting them in a bowl of rice in a warm place for 5 days - I have resurrected more than one iPhone that way - fell out of my pocket into the toilet at least 3 times - I don’t learn....

ShadierThanaPalmTree · 01/03/2021 16:21

First occasion? I would replace the with a stern reminder that in the future you will not be replacing them again as it is her responsibility to look after her things properly. At 17 I would also encourage her to do her own laundry to be honest

headhurtstoomuch · 01/03/2021 16:23

@Sexnotgender

In what world is a £100+ pair if headphones 'not that expensive' to a 17 year old?

They’re regular wired apple headphones not AirPods. I think they’re about £30 or so?

The normal ones are £19 in John Lewis. I ordered some for my son a couple of weeks back
GlendaSugarbeanIsJudgingYou · 01/03/2021 16:24

Is she normally careful with her things?

After reading everything you have posted I would probably just order her a new pair.

thefirstmrsrochester · 01/03/2021 16:24

DD’s Apple headphones (not AirPods) went through the machine in her jeans pocket. Berated (hectored) by DH for carelessness. DH then put his own AirPods through the machine. Both worked fine after a night drying out on the radiator. For £30, I’d replace your DD’s, especially as she’s having a bad time right now, and took responsibility.

EL8888 · 01/03/2021 16:25

@MixedUpFiles that’s how it works in my house. I do more than enough without clearing out people’s pockets.

YANBU OP she needs to look after her stuff better

ErickBroch · 01/03/2021 16:27

God people are bloody horrible sometimes. Not you OP. Your daughter made a mistake, she's having a rough time, she didn't kick off when you told her or ask you to replace them, not sure why so many people are ranting about her needing to look after her stuff better. People make mistakes.

Original poster
Sexnotgender · 01/03/2021 16:27

@ShadierThanaPalmTree

First occasion? I would replace the with a stern reminder that in the future you will not be replacing them again as it is her responsibility to look after her things properly. At 17 I would also encourage her to do her own laundry to be honest
Yes first time. I get the occasional tissue or lip balm but not headphones.
OP posts:
Original poster
Sexnotgender · 01/03/2021 16:28

@GlendaSugarbeanIsJudgingYou

Is she normally careful with her things?

After reading everything you have posted I would probably just order her a new pair.

Not super careful no. New iPhone has a crack in the screen 🙄 she’s a bit scatterbrained.
OP posts:
Sickofbroccoli · 01/03/2021 16:29

It’s definitely not your fault.

Could you maybe offer to go halves with her if she’s genuinely upset and having a bad time generally? Especially if it’s the first time, the point will be made about responsibility through the contribution but I bet she’ll feel a lot less crappy knowing you understand it was a mistake and you helped.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe · 01/03/2021 16:31

No. She's need to replace them and will surely remember for next time.

Reinventinganna · 01/03/2021 16:31

@ErickBroch

God people are bloody horrible sometimes. Not you OP. Your daughter made a mistake, she's having a rough time, she didn't kick off when you told her or ask you to replace them, not sure why so many people are ranting about her needing to look after her stuff better. People make mistakes.
This.
YoniAndGuy · 01/03/2021 16:31

Aw.

No, you shouldn't replace them. And if there is the barest hint of 'It was your fault! Why didn't you check my pockets!!' - then bugger it NO I would very much not replace them.

But for a generally good DD who is going through a lot right now who is being 'pretty good' about it and taking responsibility and is pretty upset about it? And they're £30?

In that case, yes I would replace them, and I'd make it clear that I was doing it because I felt bad for her and wanted to show her that I realised she'd been going through a lot recently, I appreciated that she didn't even try and deflect the blame, and I wanted to cheer her up and show my general support for her.

Lead by example, etc.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe · 01/03/2021 16:33

Mmm daughter is upset possibly, but also careless with a cracked screen now.

People aren't 'horrible' for teaching their children that money doesn't grow on trees and that actually, leaving thigs in pockets can damage or break washing machines... £££ and huge inconvenience.

YoniAndGuy · 01/03/2021 16:34

Sorry bit confusing there - what I meant in the first sentence was, you shouldn't feel RESPONSIBLE for what happened (and replacing them)! - I'd be doing so as a gesture of support not as something owed!

ErickBroch · 01/03/2021 16:36

@LyingWitchInTheWardrobe but the daughter literally hasn't asked for anything? Seems she took it on the chin? Weird assumptions about her being ungrateful and not just a scatterbrain teenager.

WellIWasInTheNeighbourhoo · 01/03/2021 16:36

Mine have gone through the wash several times and been fine after. But no not your fault, so cheeky, make sure your pockets are empty before putting clothes for someone else to wash.

yearinyearout · 01/03/2021 16:36

I can give you some hope...I did exactly the same with DS EarPods and they still work, although they were inside the charging case when they went through the wash.

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