Piss off, Pam!

[FuckingFabulous]

A relative- 'Pam'- has pissed me right off this morning on Facebook (yes, I know, the root of all evil.)

And actually, it's not even just Pam, there are a few of them but she's the worst one!

Basically me and DH are group 6 for the vaccine. Me due to caring responsibilities for our DD and DH due to an underlying health condition. DH got the jab this morning and I reposted an article about how well the U.K. is doing with their vaccination programme and mentioned DH was currently having his vaccine and I'm having mine in a few days.

Straight away, Pam comments "so many young people having their jabs- what magic key have you all got to jump the queue? I'm Over 50 and I work with the public but I can't just waltz in like some! Oh well"

I just replied that I couldn't speak for anyone else but DH and I are in group 6, me for caring and him for health reasons and were invited to book, so there has been no queue jumping, and I realise it's frustrating to wait to be called when there are so many hopes riding on it. She then commented "So because you're a parent with normal parenting responsibilities, you are saying you have got rights ahead of me, a person over 50? Don't make me laugh."
I didn't reply because I was fuming as she knows full well that I have a round the clock caring role for my daughter (and she's a woman who wouldn't even have her own 20yo DD home to recover from surgery as it was "above and beyond" her responsibility ) so I was reeling from the audacity of her! I went to make a coffee and consider my response to her. I was all for politely telling her that she's being judgemental and although she's disappointed, it's not kind to be so dismissive when she's well aware of the difficulties I face at home, but then when I looked again, I saw it had all kicked off a bit!

Pam has posted another comment saying "And what's Mr FuckingFabulous's magic key condition?" Another older female relative chimes in then with a heart reaction and a comment of "I'd also love to know this, Pam! Beggars belief!!" Pam shoots back with "last time I checked, being an idiot wasn't on the list of conditions!" Cue about five laugh reactions from older relatives and comments like "this is why I love you, you say it like it is, Pam!"

DH has ADHD. Not sure if all older relatives know this but Pam, the one who called him an idiot, does indeed know!! I've had to speak to her and her husband before when they both expressed an opinion that ADHD and ASD don't exist and they're excuses for poor performance. And it is not even the condition which entitles him to a jab. Several people have also commented to her and some of the others that their comments are disgusting and Pam has been popping on a copy paste reply of "I am entitled to my opinion - it's a free country still."

So Pam has dismissed my caring responsibilities and taken the piss out of my DH for his ADHD. I have deleted the thread and spoken to my mum about it and she said it's best just to leave it, we don't want bad feelings in the family. Um, what about MY feelings? Or DH's??

WIBU to message Pam and tell her how bloody vile she is?? I should do it to all of them really, but I doubt it would have any impact.

My mil does things like this OP. Posting the British youngersxare all wankers etc. If I dare point out that my teens, her grandsons, are nice kids who are lovely her cronies jump on and attack me. It stinks of them bitching behind my back. I used to silence for every month but in the end I blocked her. I also realised that she is a miserable toxic woman who only likes white people over 50 so I blocked her on everything.

I hate FB. Actually I think it damages family relationships as dh wished his mum happy birthday via direct messenger and she wants nuts with him as it wasnt on FB where she had 200 beautiful birthday wishes.

I dont even know 200 people forget 200 people who post on my FB.

Its batshit

@tenlittlecygnets op doesn't say ADHD is the reason. What she says about ADHD is:

"...And it is not even the condition which entitles him to a jab."

Op has reconfirmed this in a number of her posts whilst explaining the husband has a respiratory problem.

[quote FuckingFabulous]@RuledbyASD and everyone else who is concerned they've been missed or that they ought to be eligible-

www.nhs.uk/conditions/coronavirus-covid-19/coronavirus-vaccination/book-coronavirus-vaccination/

Here. You can book your vaccine here if you're eligible. It's been encouraged for weeks if you have an underlying condition but apparently carers and those with learning disabilities can also use this to book if they're registered with a GP and eligible. If you're not, take it up with your GP. People who have been offered vaccines or people who have had them aren't responsible for you not having had one yet. [/quote]
^^This. If keyboards warriors like Pam think they are more medically qualified than the people who set the vulnerable groups then perhaps they should retrain.

Otherwise perhaps they could mind their own business and be thankful that their health is better than the higher priority groups.

Apparently 30 million people are ahead of me in the queue for the vaccine. I'm lucky to be so healthy.

for you OP dealing with the difficulties of managing life with 2 people you care about with their conditions. For life, not just for Covid.

50 isn’t even that old! Why are people like Pam using “over 50” as the benchmark?

"And it is not even the condition which entitles him to a jab"

So why mention adhd if that not why he's getting jt?

@Sapho47

"And it is not even the condition which entitles him to a jab"

So why mention adhd if that not why he's getting jt?

Sigh.

Because that's what my aunt Pam was referring to when she said being an idiot wasn't a condition. That's why I was so angry with her comment. I explained this. Repeatedly.

@FuckingFabulous

I can't believe you're still having to explain the ADHD thing. I take my hat off to you having that level of patience. This has been going on for hours now

@GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing

50 isn’t even that old! Why are people like Pam using “over 50” as the benchmark?

Not defending Pam, just answering your question - because 50-55 is group 9, the lowest priority of the vulnerable groups, before vaccination is extended into the general adult population

[quote LouJ85]@FuckingFabulous

I can't believe you're still having to explain the ADHD thing. I take my hat off to you having that level of patience. This has been going on for hours now [/quote]
Agreed!

OP it's made me feel better about getting the vaccine when it's my turn BECAUSE so many people I know have shared that they have had it on Facebook. I'm happy for everyone thats had it already.

I wouldn’t have been able to help myself and said something along the lines of ‘ maybe you having been invited for a jab as everyone knows you’re a massive twat who isn’t worth saving’

@shamalidacdak

You get the early jab for ADHD? That's insane

Good grief! Read the sodding thread

@FuckingFabulous You are heroic! Your embroidered response to Pam is the best response I've ever seen to anything, I love it and have saved the image to use myself. I have a couple of Pams in my family and they honestly mentally drained me on facebook. Once I removed them I felt such relief. As someone else once told me, you can't argue with stupid.
I'm glad you and your family have had the vaccine!

@FuckingFabulous

Dear God you must have the patience of a bloody saint. The amount of times you have had to explain the ADHD scenario for a group on here that can't quite comprehend your OP.

My DH and DS have ADHD and it is a very real condition. They most certainly are not idiots. How disrespectful to your DH and especially with no backup from your family.

Your utterly brilliant reply to AP must have blindsided her. There is no comeback from that.

Congratulations on receiving your vaccines and your quite brilliant retort.

@FuckingFabulous - I agree you must be in line for a sainthood for putting up with the twats in your family for so long, and the hard-of-reading-comprehension types on this thread too!

I wouldn't waste your energy on making that wonderful piece of embroidery for Pam, as she's not worth it (and would only bin it) but it was INSPIRED posting it on the thread!

This whole COVID situation is really helping some people show their true colours in glorious technicolour, hey.

Bit like the mobility cars - people getting all envious of those getting mobility cars, without considering what is behind the need for one! Fucking disgusting attitudes.

At least it will cut down your costs for Christmas cards, presents, and petrol when you're allowed out to visit people again - won't need to bother with any of your Dad's side of the family again!

Sapho47 You really need to at least read the OPs posts. Pam called her husband an idiot because he has ADHD. It’s an additional insult she threw at the OP because she was jealous that he’d got the vaccine. Which he was entitled to because of his breathing issues. Pam was just being a cunt. A jealous entitled cunt too. Pam is a nasty woman. Don’t be like Pam 😊

If I were you, I think I'd put another post up on Facebook stating "As some of you may have noticed on my post the other day about me and DH getting our vaccines, a few people felt the need to abuse us and call us dreadful names etc. so I had to delete the post" I would even go as far as to name her. I would then just reiterate what your original post said.

@FuckingFabulous I’m nearly the same age as Pam. I have two issues that mean I’m in phase 2 (in the US, it’s a bit different). Some of my younger, healthier friends and family have already been vaccinated and do you know what - I’m delighted for them. The jobs they do mean they are much more at risk as I can easily WFH and isolate. Yes, I cannot wait until I’m FREE, and yes I’m a tad envious. But I do not see it as queue jumping, and I’m glad they have had it because I do kinda care about them. Pam cares about no one but herself.

Also, any of your family that raise a fuss just tell them ‘I’m only telling the truth/saying how it is’ or what ever Pams favorite excuse is for being a bitch.

@FuckingFabulous I've tried using the online service every single damn day! Not eligible apparently!!!!

[quote RuledbyASD]@FuckingFabulous I've tried using the online service every single damn day! Not eligible apparently!!!![/quote]
Then, as has been suggested, you need to contact your GP to see why you are NOT on the list, as your condition suggests you should be.

I feel your pain...(ish, I was a real queue jumper)

I got the first dose back in January aged 27, with the only reason being that I work for the NHS in an non clinical role and my own mother was angry... like I’d personally picked the order or the criteria

There is a process, you fit where you fit. Some will get ‘bumped’ up for reasons you might not agree with, but tough! Are you telling me that if offered, you’d refuse because of a moral high ground and waste a dose because you’re not worthy...

Wow, slight detour there... Pam is a cow, you aren’t skipping any queue and should be able to promote positive association and correct information about receiving a vaccine that you’re totally entitled to. Block Pam and her minions

Who needs public health advice from qualified professionals when we could all listen to ‘Pam’?

*'HE DIDN'T GET THE VACCINE BECAUSE OF ADHD'
*
Has become the new 'cancel the cheque' I fear!!

@AlternativePerspective

@ itsgettingwierd I have a master plan. We could all do a trade off for our vaccine slot.

So we all put our conditions into a box and then those who feel they should be entitled to the vaccine can have a lucky dip, then they get a health condition, but in exchange for that they get a vaccine.

But it’s a lucky dip, so you don’t know what vaccine you’ll be getting, but you do know that you’ll get a vaccine.

So they could end up with a serious physical disability, or a respiratory condition or a heart condition or maybe even cancer. But that doesn’t matter, because they’ll be getting the vaccine....

Who’s in?

I love this idea!

I've had a few tuts at having the vaccine when I look fit and well and in my 30s

Anyone want to swap a life limiting illness which requires medication daily and hospitalisation at least twice a year for an earlier vaccine slot?? Anyone??? No??? Hmmmm.... Strange that! 😆

[quote RuledbyASD]@FuckingFabulous I've tried using the online service every single damn day! Not eligible apparently!!!![/quote]
And how is this the op's fault/ problem? You've clearly either missed or misunderstood the content of the op's posts. divert your energy into contacting your gp to resolve the issue. The op can't contact your gp for you to fix your situation.