Piss off, Pam!

[FuckingFabulous]

A relative- 'Pam'- has pissed me right off this morning on Facebook (yes, I know, the root of all evil.)

And actually, it's not even just Pam, there are a few of them but she's the worst one!

Basically me and DH are group 6 for the vaccine. Me due to caring responsibilities for our DD and DH due to an underlying health condition. DH got the jab this morning and I reposted an article about how well the U.K. is doing with their vaccination programme and mentioned DH was currently having his vaccine and I'm having mine in a few days.

Straight away, Pam comments "so many young people having their jabs- what magic key have you all got to jump the queue? I'm Over 50 and I work with the public but I can't just waltz in like some! Oh well"

I just replied that I couldn't speak for anyone else but DH and I are in group 6, me for caring and him for health reasons and were invited to book, so there has been no queue jumping, and I realise it's frustrating to wait to be called when there are so many hopes riding on it. She then commented "So because you're a parent with normal parenting responsibilities, you are saying you have got rights ahead of me, a person over 50? Don't make me laugh."
I didn't reply because I was fuming as she knows full well that I have a round the clock caring role for my daughter (and she's a woman who wouldn't even have her own 20yo DD home to recover from surgery as it was "above and beyond" her responsibility ) so I was reeling from the audacity of her! I went to make a coffee and consider my response to her. I was all for politely telling her that she's being judgemental and although she's disappointed, it's not kind to be so dismissive when she's well aware of the difficulties I face at home, but then when I looked again, I saw it had all kicked off a bit!

Pam has posted another comment saying "And what's Mr FuckingFabulous's magic key condition?" Another older female relative chimes in then with a heart reaction and a comment of "I'd also love to know this, Pam! Beggars belief!!" Pam shoots back with "last time I checked, being an idiot wasn't on the list of conditions!" Cue about five laugh reactions from older relatives and comments like "this is why I love you, you say it like it is, Pam!"

DH has ADHD. Not sure if all older relatives know this but Pam, the one who called him an idiot, does indeed know!! I've had to speak to her and her husband before when they both expressed an opinion that ADHD and ASD don't exist and they're excuses for poor performance. And it is not even the condition which entitles him to a jab. Several people have also commented to her and some of the others that their comments are disgusting and Pam has been popping on a copy paste reply of "I am entitled to my opinion - it's a free country still."

So Pam has dismissed my caring responsibilities and taken the piss out of my DH for his ADHD. I have deleted the thread and spoken to my mum about it and she said it's best just to leave it, we don't want bad feelings in the family. Um, what about MY feelings? Or DH's??

WIBU to message Pam and tell her how bloody vile she is?? I should do it to all of them really, but I doubt it would have any impact.

Just block Pam. Problem solved. However, I have to say I wouldn't be posting about this in the first place. Enough people are stupid enough to make it a contentious issue.

@SleepingStandingUp

Sorry Lou just saw you're heavily pregnant. Congratulations and hopefully the number of people having the jab will help to protect people like you until you're able to get it.

Cross posted.

Thank you.

@solicitoring

Pam is a twat. But did your husband seriously get the vaccine early due to adhd?

No.

Read the OP again. And the numerous clarifications posted throughout the thread!

Doh sorry I didn't read your post properly. Ignore me.

You should send one of the replies posted above - don't let her get away with publicly bitching about your family. I'd really put the boot in and show her up for the cunt that she is. And your mum should have your back and should be more worried about you than not causing bad feeling in the family. Pam has already done that.
I don't understand why people are so reluctant to defend themselves.

Oh god who cares who has had the vaccine. Who has time to post all this shit. Clearly someone with no job and nothing better to do.

OP, I think that you have made your point well and it sounds like you are genuinely assessed and included so you have nothing to be ashamed about..

If it was me I wouldnt have shared hat on FB - then I share very little personal stuff on FB.

But, in no way does that justify the vile from Pam and others.

If it was me I would just unfriend and block Pam and possibly unfriend anyone else that made derogatory comments about you but you would be best to make a call on that.

@solicitoring

Pam is a twat. But did your husband seriously get the vaccine early due to adhd?

No. But even if he did, it wouldn’t be his fault. If you’re called, you go for your jab.

Definitely what GreebolsMySpiritAnimal: suggested.

The easy solution to this is to just delete your Facebook account.

Why on earth do people waste time on there??

@FuckingFabulous people should be concerning themselves less about why other people are getting it. As ever lm amused by armchair scientists giving their “expert” opinions, despite maybe only having a GCSE or o level in science.

Your situation clearly means you’re both entitled to it and that’s my options as a qualified nurse.

Not your fault she’s jealous and bitchy. Plus Pam is hardly elderly!

#fuckpam

@GreeboIsMySpiritAnimal

"You're right Pam, it has nothing to do with my caring responsibilities or DH's condition, I was just trying to spare your feelings. The truth is, the medical community at large discussed it, and agreed that as you'd be no great loss to humanity, they wouldn't rush to vaccinate you. Sorry "

Bloody love this! Please send it, OP.

Everyone who works for my employer got vaccinated early on. Because most of the staff are seeing vulnerable clients F2F, whoever makes these decisions decided it was too difficult to work out who wasn't and even head office staff have been invited for vaccinations.

I haven't actually seen a client in the flesh for over a year, but next week something could crop up that meant I had to. I felt very privileged though, even though I'm 65 and wouldn't have had to wait very long anyway.

"Pam" sounds a really nasty piece of work.

My DB is in his 20’s and is having his, I asked him why and he said he is in group 6 due to mental illness. I’d rather wait for my vaccination than take his illness sooooo.

Block her.

Give her time and she’ll be moaning that no-one visits her, or takes her out for her birthday, or ferries her to the doctors, and bitching about others, but you won’t see it so it won’t affect you anymore.

Plus Pam is a imbecile

Pam is horrible and needs to be disowned but I wouldn’t have posted on Facebook as lots of people are desperately worried and want the vaccine very much. It’s a bit, ‘Let them eat cake’...to me. Take a quiet pleasure in the security it gives you.

@BoomShakeShake

The easy solution to this is to just delete your Facebook account.

Why on earth do people waste time on there??

Or... just delete idiots off your friends list and carry on using your Facebook as you please, minus the judgemental twats?

I've seen lots of facebook posts from people getting the vaccine. It has never occurred to me to be pissed off that they are getting it sooner than me, why the fuck would it? They are more at risk or in the case of OP in a very difficult set of circumstances.

Is Pam your Mum's sister? I'd like to think she'd have more of an opinion rather than don't rock the boat. Pam has already done so.

Show her this thread.

Pam is a bitch.

@HOkieCOkie which bit do you agree with? That having a lung condition doesn't make you a priority over a healthy 50 yo? That a child who requires round the clock care is the same as caring for a typical child and that if their parents are incapacitated it's fine cos ANYONE can step in an deal with autism meltdowns, gastostromy feeds, o2, complex medical regimes, monitoring of urine output levels etc? Or that ADHD means you're an idiot?

Sounds like Pam doesn’t like you much tbh.
Whatever I felt about the fairness of others getting vaccine before me, I would never comment on a friend or family members joy at getting the vaccine - I’d be hard-pressed to even say such a thing on an anonymous forum.
Just block her. I’d also question what my DM did’t have my back. What a toxic family.

I shared a funny picture from my memories this morning and I have seen that Pam commented an hour ago on a picture of my children asking "Where's your vaccine party gone? 🤣🤣🤣" and tagging the woman who also wanted to know how DH got a jab early.

DH, who is normally not at all bothered by FB has commented and said "We're still celebrating here! Looks like you're not getting invited to anything, Pam."

I've unfriended her now and blocked the others, but I don't want to block her yet because I still want to message her and tell her what an absolute cunt she is. I'll just do it when I've got the time to craft a proper response later.

Some people can be right arseholes about this sodding vaccination. The local posts about the so called healthy youngsters queue jumping have cropped up a few times, only for it to be revealed that they're NHS staff or CEV.

A few family members have had a moan that my sister has already had hers and I'm about to get mine as we shouldn't be a priority. My sister is a frontline medical worker and I'm in group 6. It wouldn't perhaps be as infuriating if the ones moaning were waiting to be vaccinated, but they've already been done and still think its wrong .

I'd be tempted to reply saying well thankfully the medical experts get to decide the priority and not a bunch of jumped up judgemental know-nothing arseholes

@FuckingFabulous

I shared a funny picture from my memories this morning and I have seen that Pam commented an hour ago on a picture of my children asking "Where's your vaccine party gone? 🤣🤣🤣" and tagging the woman who also wanted to know how DH got a jab early.

DH, who is normally not at all bothered by FB has commented and said "We're still celebrating here! Looks like you're not getting invited to anything, Pam."

I've unfriended her now and blocked the others, but I don't want to block her yet because I still want to message her and tell her what an absolute cunt she is. I'll just do it when I've got the time to craft a proper response later.

Is Pam usually such a cow to you, OP? Or is the the first time she's shown her true colours?

Just block the oxygen thief