Piss off, Pam!

[FuckingFabulous]

A relative- 'Pam'- has pissed me right off this morning on Facebook (yes, I know, the root of all evil.)

And actually, it's not even just Pam, there are a few of them but she's the worst one!

Basically me and DH are group 6 for the vaccine. Me due to caring responsibilities for our DD and DH due to an underlying health condition. DH got the jab this morning and I reposted an article about how well the U.K. is doing with their vaccination programme and mentioned DH was currently having his vaccine and I'm having mine in a few days.

Straight away, Pam comments "so many young people having their jabs- what magic key have you all got to jump the queue? I'm Over 50 and I work with the public but I can't just waltz in like some! Oh well"

I just replied that I couldn't speak for anyone else but DH and I are in group 6, me for caring and him for health reasons and were invited to book, so there has been no queue jumping, and I realise it's frustrating to wait to be called when there are so many hopes riding on it. She then commented "So because you're a parent with normal parenting responsibilities, you are saying you have got rights ahead of me, a person over 50? Don't make me laugh."
I didn't reply because I was fuming as she knows full well that I have a round the clock caring role for my daughter (and she's a woman who wouldn't even have her own 20yo DD home to recover from surgery as it was "above and beyond" her responsibility ) so I was reeling from the audacity of her! I went to make a coffee and consider my response to her. I was all for politely telling her that she's being judgemental and although she's disappointed, it's not kind to be so dismissive when she's well aware of the difficulties I face at home, but then when I looked again, I saw it had all kicked off a bit!

Pam has posted another comment saying "And what's Mr FuckingFabulous's magic key condition?" Another older female relative chimes in then with a heart reaction and a comment of "I'd also love to know this, Pam! Beggars belief!!" Pam shoots back with "last time I checked, being an idiot wasn't on the list of conditions!" Cue about five laugh reactions from older relatives and comments like "this is why I love you, you say it like it is, Pam!"

DH has ADHD. Not sure if all older relatives know this but Pam, the one who called him an idiot, does indeed know!! I've had to speak to her and her husband before when they both expressed an opinion that ADHD and ASD don't exist and they're excuses for poor performance. And it is not even the condition which entitles him to a jab. Several people have also commented to her and some of the others that their comments are disgusting and Pam has been popping on a copy paste reply of "I am entitled to my opinion - it's a free country still."

So Pam has dismissed my caring responsibilities and taken the piss out of my DH for his ADHD. I have deleted the thread and spoken to my mum about it and she said it's best just to leave it, we don't want bad feelings in the family. Um, what about MY feelings? Or DH's??

WIBU to message Pam and tell her how bloody vile she is?? I should do it to all of them really, but I doubt it would have any impact.

@FuckingFabulous

To the person who said it doesn't sound like anyone in my house is particularly vulnerable. We are group six. Five other priority groups came before us. People who were extremely vulnerable. However, our situation/conditions mean that we are in group six. Sorry if you don't think we are worthy. The government disagrees.

And to everyone on here who seem to be sympathising with Pam and her spite and envy, mentioning my bragging about my special category- are you also jealous of me having to dress my teen and take her to the toilet and attend to her personal hygiene? Are you all green with envy imagining the number of appointments I need to attend with her? The number of times she's been admitted to hospital or all the nights I haven't been able to sleep because she hasn't been able to either? Wish you had to literally pin your child down with your body during attacks and episodes which she would unintentionally injure herself through if you didn't? Think you'd quite like the task of cleaning up food and drink from the walls and floor where it's been thrown because she can't control her movements? And if you were like me, still reeling from and learning all about this condition that came on out of absolutely nowhere last year, I'm sure you'd feel really special and superior.

Now THAT is the kind of thing I don't put on social media owing to my DD's right to privacy.

Carers might be in group six because we tick a box, but have you any concept of what goes into that tick??

^This is all anybody has to read. It says everything.

@Hobbesmanc

You know as upsetting as this is- maybe people should just keep quiet about their vaccination status. It's a contentious issue and there's really no need to share.

Pam sounds like a total cow bag though

This

My DS had his vaccination in early December (he is 27 and asthmatic but also works for the NHS) he told no one except me about it as he was aware some people wouldnt see beyond a young 'healthy' male and assume queue jumping too. He at one point considered declining the vaccination as he felt so guilty and confused at being offered it, but our employer (we both work for the same ambulance trust) said, there was no mistake and he had been marked as CEV hence being one of the first to get it.

So I think maybe keeping it to yourself would have been the less contentious issue, just have the jab and say nothing on social media. :)

Some of you! Honestly, I wouldn't know who to put my money on if someone told me that one of the commenters was actually Pam.

@GreeboIsMySpiritAnimal

"You're right Pam, it has nothing to do with my caring responsibilities or DH's condition, I was just trying to spare your feelings. The truth is, the medical community at large discussed it, and agreed that as you'd be no great loss to humanity, they wouldn't rush to vaccinate you. Sorry "

I like that response.

I was vaccinated at the grand old age of 49 and have not told a soul becasuse i expect also the sort of sour, rude and ignorant comments like that also.

Who are these imbeciles who are trying to police who gets the vaccine and when? Is the implication that if you’re not deemed “worthy” yet you should be turning it down? Because yeah I wouldn’t be doing that.

I saw on Twitter the other day that Tom Skinner from the Apprentice tweeted about having the vaccine and later posted a video explaining that he had a kidney condition. It’s awful that people feel pressured into disclosing information like that. No one is answerable to any of the vaccine mafia ffs

@cuddlymunchkin

Who knows how many are on her friend list, the point is that she's bragging about getting the jab when she absolutely knows other people on her list are upset at not receiving it. She knows it looks like she has got the jab ahead of time because she put no explanation with her post.

Pam is her family. She knows that the OP is a career and her DH has a lung condition. You don’t need to explain shit to people who already know...

@FuckingFabulous Like you I posted on FB when I had mine. Thankfully only one person made a snide comment and other family members jumped on it before I even saw it.

Who are these imbeciles who are trying to police who gets the vaccine and when?

Probably the same ones who have been trying to police the whole population's movements, including how many walks they do from the house and how many toilet rolls they buy, since April 2020.

@FuckingFabulous

Some of you! Honestly, I wouldn't know who to put my money on if someone told me that one of the commenters was actually Pam.

I think people are really at the end of their rope. Pam may be really suffering with the anxiety of the situation. Be kind to Pam. Try to make peace. Congratulations on getting your vaccines, count your blessings.

Personally I'd indirectly shame her. Something along the lines of...

"I re-posted an article this morning and I'm throughougly disappointed in family members and other aquaintences that tried to turn this into a witch hunt and a personal attack. There really is no need to attack your friends and family for decisions that have been made by the government and relevant authorities, which you have no control over. In a world where you can be anything, be kind."

Any type of further posting will cause more of a shit storm however. So if you don't want the hassle, I'd leave it.

Pam's an arse and should know better.

Why post it on FB,just plain weird.Then getting involved in the drama of it,even weirder.

@FuckingFabulous

Some of you! Honestly, I wouldn't know who to put my money on if someone told me that one of the commenters was actually Pam.

There’s clearly a myriad of Pamela out there. They’ve always been there but thanks to this pandemic we see them for what they are a lot more clearly now. Unfortunately it’s because they’re being even bigger dickheads than ever.

@Rillington

Why did you need to broadcast that you had, had the vaccine?

Why not? She had reposted an article about how well the U.K. is doing and mentioned her DH was having his & she was having hers soon. Why not? It's not a state secret. She didn't throw a street party. She mentioned it on HER FB page.

Ignore all the dementors....Sucking the Joy and Hope out of everything. I'm glad you've got the vaccine and hopefully the UK is on its way to freedom 🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻

I think people are really at the end of their rope. Pam may be really suffering with the anxiety of the situation.
Be kind to Pam. Try to make peace.

Yes - be kind to Pam. Especially when Pam comes out with stuff like...

"last time I checked, being an idiot wasn't on the list of conditions!"

Be kind to her. Always.

Be kind to Pam. Try to make peace.
Congratulations on getting your vaccines, count your blessings.

Yeah that would be a no from me personally but I’m never in a massive hurry to be kind to someone who takes the piss out of my loved ones disabilities. So fucking sick of #bekind it always seems to be said by/about dickheads.

@LesLavandes

Why did you name her'Pam'?

Maybe a bitchy term like ''Karen'' is, in America?

It is much better for everyone to stay OFF Farcebook, and those lucky enough to have a vaccine ought not to 'boast' about it...

I've had several people message me to say they have had a jab..there appears to be no rhyme or reason, but it does seem to cause ill feeling..

Some people have had two jabs, while others , none.

Completely random.

Congratulations on getting your vaccines, count your blessings.

@RubyViolet It’s not a blessing to be in a higher vulnerable group, or live with someone in a higher group.

The Pam’s of this world are the ones that should be counting their blessings.

I’d love to have been in the group with the rest of people my own age with no health issues in my household. I’m not that lucky. Those that are should count their blessings.

Be kind to Pam.

@RubyViolet Pam doesn't deserve OP's kindness- she was nasty to her and her DH.

Dearest Auntie Pam... As you very well know, our little girl requires 24hr cares. You know... Caring? A verb you are unfamiliar with, I know - it’s the thing you couldn’t even bring yourself to provide when your own daughter needed your help for a couple of days after surgery a couple of years ago. Oh yeah.... because you’re a heartless, malignant bitch who gets her jollies by being cruel to her own relatives on Facebook. Meanwhile, that kind of malignancy doesn’t qualify you to jump the queue, unfortunately. You’d better stay safely tucked inside the house spreading your poison on the internet. Enjoy your life!

@SoulofanAggron

Be kind to Pam.

@RubyViolet Pam doesn't deserve OP's kindness- she was nasty to her and her DH.

Be kind to Pam my arse!

@ItsJackieWeaverBitch

*Be kind to Pam. Try to make peace. Congratulations on getting your vaccines, count your blessings.*

Yeah that would be a no from me personally but I’m never in a massive hurry to be kind to someone who takes the piss out of my loved ones disabilities. So fucking sick of #bekind it always seems to be said by/about dickheads.

My default position in life is to be kind to people. Unless / until they're an absolute bastard to me (as Pam was to the OP). Then "be kind" can quite frankly naff off.

Oh... AAAAND block!

Pam is vile. Tbh I would’ve left the post up and risen above it, Pam had pretty much hung herself with her own rope, anybody decent on there could’ve seen what a cunt she is.

I think it’s a good thing when people post on Facebook that they’ve had their vaccine. It’s really positive to see how quickly the NHS are getting through people and also could encourage others to have theirs if they’re wavering. I’m group 8 so I’ll be soon, but I’m really fit and healthy and am perfectly happy for younger people with health issues no matter what they are to go before me.

I'd have replied 'I believe cunts are put to the bottom of the list - but don't worry Pam, I'm sure they'll get to you eventually'.

@LaurieFairyCake

Is ADHD on the list of underlying health conditions ? I've googled the list and can't see it

I have 3 people to tell who would be delighted

No, that’s why the OP said ADHD isn’t the condition that he’s entitled to the jab for. He has another underlying condition.