To share this earth shattering life changing news!

[Breastfeedingworries]

You don’t have to hang your clothes up!

Okay everyone else has known this a long time. I’ve spent years with a rail and mess at the bottom of a very large wardrobe space.

All through childhood I was told off for not hanging my clothes, the only draws I had were stiff painted vile things I had to use every ounce of childhood strength to open. (So I never did) was a very messy unorganised child surrounded by hangers and toys and told off on a daily basis.

I posted previously about getting the council house and being able to be freed from a psychologically controlling mother ( I’ve got learning difficulties, low self esteem and poor mh)

Today speaking to a close friend whose been seriously helping me organise the house, painting and decorating she asked why I was bothering with cupboards when I always end up in a mess. I never buy anything that creases as I don’t iron.

So long winded and bizzare but I’m buying two sets of 6 draws and I feel so free and happy.

Immediately Have been shot down and told I have to hang dresses ect and sent photos of old painted draws by family members...but this tiny bit of life knowledge has changed my outlook on my whole childhood. I wasn’t given the tools or correct support.

What young child wants to constantly hang their clothes...wants the stress of someone opening and checking... has the time with their adhd to concentrate and complete the task! (I’m still undiagnosed but suspected adhd but I’m also dyslexic and dyspraxic)

I’m just in shock about my past and this small thing has basically made me cry with happiness.

I thought you had to hang clothes neatly.

Fuck that!

I don't get it either - surely hanging clothes is a lot easier than folding and putting them in drawers? I do iron though, hate un ironed clothes - and weirdly I rather enjoy ironing.

However, OP if it makes you happy then go for it. No-one else should tell you how to do things and it's got nothing to do with your family how you organise yourself.

@Skinnytailedsquirrel

What on earth are "draws"? Please help as I'm always looking for good tidying up tips. Thanks

It's just a misspelling of drawers...?

@Octane

I don't get it – if you end up with piles of clothes because hanging is too much effort, don't your drawers just end up as piles of clothes too? Surely folding/rolling and arranging in a drawer is just as much work as slipping something onto a hanger?

Sometimes we form psychological barriers to doing things. They may be small simple tasks, but mentally we blow them up into bigger tasks. It's a bit like writer's block. You just can't get past the block to do it even though it should be easy and sometimes we can't do other things because we are so hung up on the thing that is blocking us, so it becomes a vicious circle. At least that is what happens to me, so I suspect the OP may feel the same way about hanging things up and opening stiff drawers. Remove the block and hopefully everything will become easier.

Good for you to have found a solution for the way you like to live.

For me personally hanging clothes is so much quicker and easier than folding, I can never seem to fold satisfactorily. And if I leave clothes piled up, I can’t find things easily.
My ideal would be to have much more hanging space and only use drawers for underwear.

It's liberating to make your own decisions. Congrats on your new freedom!

@Breastfeedingworries

~Really enjoy your drawers!
I don't hang anything up except coats. It all goes into drawers.

I also know the exact jiggity jiggity jiggle it takes to close a sticky painted drawer...from childhood, like you.

Hope you love your drawers.

@Skinnytailedsquirrel

What on earth are "draws"? Please help as I'm always looking for good tidying up tips. Thanks

It’s pretty obvious from the post what is meant. But if that’s not obvious enough for you, the full page of replies before yours, talking about “drawers” should have also made it clear.

But taking the piss out of someone with learning difficulties and dyslexia is clearly more of a priority than reading the thread.

I hang up virtually nothing other than the odd posh frock.
And I never iron, ever.

@ItsNotNormalLove

You say it sounds so boring now you think about it, but it's not boring at all. It's a small thing to most people but to you it's a big fat symbol of freedom! And that's to be celebrated! 🎉 You get to decide everything for yourself now. Congratulations

Yeah, this. It's all about the little things. Good or bad, with emotions. The little things represent so much. I love your post, OP. First step in your new life of 'Fuck 'em, this is MY life, and I'M the one who makes the decisions.' It's so heartening. And there are so many decisions to make every day - the good feeling is going to get reinforced over and over, all the time

If you do like the feeling of ironed stuff (which I do) iron it immediately before you're about to use it rather than before you put it away.

It's a waste of time ironing stuff before you hang it up or put it in drawers. The stuff just creases again and the only non-benefit is that you end up with some more organised creases amongst the random ones.

@Skinnytailedsquirrel maybe good to have another think before posting that?

@Breastfeedingworries well done! Whatever makes your home feel like yours! Nobody else matters and they should keep their nose out.

You area doing great, keep going.

The day I sent my never-used iron to the charity shop was a big moment for me,OP. I finally admitted I have never ironed and I’m never going to. Liberation!

I’m glad you’re enjoying your new home, just the way you want it.

Love, love, love this thread and enjoy your new drawers @Breastfeedingworries! Open and close them, feel the glorious liberation and empowerment of making your own choices and enjoy that moment

I think the next liberating thing you need to do is to cut contact with whichever family member is even now sending you photo's and telling you how to organise your stuff. Doing that would I suspect be a huge weight off your shoulders.

Yes! Agree OP and would even take it a step further. I am pathologically messy (ADHD) and just have a large wicker basket in my room. All clothes straight in there- don't even need drawers!

I strongly suggest looking at Marie kendo's folding method for when you fill your drawers
Life changing!

I had a similar epiphany a couple of years back - I hacked our wardrobes to bits and burnt them. It felt amazing 😅

I think if I had a really spacious bedroom and lots of room I might feel differently about wardrobes. But we're unbelievably short on space and I don't find wardrobes an efficient use of the space we do have.

Added to that, I can't seem to use the space on the floor of the wardrobe effectively and it just ends up being a giant bloody mess that's disorganised and tumbles out every time I open the doors! Drawers are the way forward for me - and I wear lots of maxi dresses too.

Well done on making decisions that bring you joy OP! Definitely Marie Kondo is worth a look to see if she can help with any more suggestions re space and tidying.

I'm glad that you feel liberated but personally don't 'get it'.

It takes seconds to slip something onto a hanger but ages to fold or roll something for a drawer.

Wont the drawers just end up a big messy jumble like the bottom of a wardrobe, where you can't find anything and your clothes are all crumpled?

What about fabrics that need to be hung like silk or linen, or longer dresses?

But...but...hanging is so much easier than folding neatly and putting in a drawer. Plus you can see it easier, and it gets less creased than when it’s shoved in a drawer.

I still hang dresses and jackets, but got rid of all my shelves and bought drawers instead for everybody. Everything is folded the Kondo way, it's really great, and DC can also see all their clothes and pull the one they want out without messing the entire drawer up.

I don’t get it. Of course you need to hang dresses, skirts, trousers, it doesn’t mean you can’t have drawers too. Drawers are for underwear, jumpers, T-shirt’s, leggings etc.

You absolutely don't! You don't have to do anything you don't want to!

Can I suggest you stop trying with family members that give you grief? You won't change their minds. They won't suddenly realise you are right, competent, able, and have been all along. They'll keep trying to convince you you are wrong.

I remember talking to you when you were trapped in your room. I've thought of you often. I'm so glad you are free- well done!

@Aprilx

I don’t get it. Of course you need to hang dresses, skirts, trousers, it doesn’t mean you can’t have drawers too. Drawers are for underwear, jumpers, T-shirt’s, leggings etc.

Of course you don't have to hang those things. Why? The only thing we hang is shirts.

I also hate hanging OP, don't know why. I don't mind folding clothes. I don't iron either, just seems like such a huge time drain. Imagine how hours of ironing add up over a lifetime. I just iron as and when if something I want to wear is creased.

Good for you feeling able to make your own choices now.

Also, another possibility for you to consider- I hang things on hangers while they dry, then put them away still on the hanger.

It totally depends what you wear, as well. You can't put a glamourös evening dress in a drawer. Jeans and Ts? of course.

People saying hanging is easier probably don't have dyspraxia. Back when I had a wardrobe (also as a child) it would take several attempts to get things to actually stay on the hanger, take ages doing up fiddlely buttons the wrong way, and half the clothes would still end up on the floor next time I tried to get anything out. Using a wardrobe literally added about 10 minutes to the time it takes to get dressed everyday, as you get stuck in a cycle of re-hanging the stuff you knocked down, then knocking more stuff in the process.

At least your stuff doesn't fall out of a draw, even if your foldings not perfect.