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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To even consider giving husband second chance

999 replies

sal1223 · 19/02/2021 19:48

Husband of 17 years , 2 kids and what I thought was a happy life confessed to me late last night that he had a one night stand 3 years ago. Totally out of character for him - she'd been openly pursuing him apparently - and he got blind drunk one night and had sex with her. I'm devastated, heartbroken and can't stop crying - I'm in shock . I always thought that when a partner does this the other person should immediately kick them out and end the relationship but I'm not feeling as black and white about it as I thought I'd be . He says he hates himself and never told me because he loves me and didn't want me to leave him but the guilt has been too much to bear and he's considered taking his life - that's when he decided to tell me.
YABU - kick him out
YANBU - it was a one off with no emotional connection that he deeply regrets

Wtf do I do ? I'm working from home with the kids and he's working on site - the woman has moved away.
I love him , the kids love him he's a great dad but my head is swimming - I've been sick , can't eat , can't focus . Any advise ? X

OP posts:
isthismylifenow · 23/02/2021 06:59

Oh OP the more I read the angrier I am getting on your behalf.

I am afraid to say that I am thinking along the same lines as pp. Does he really want to salvage this, because it sounds like he is looking for an exit but yet still to be seen as the good guy. And he is furious with you for sharing your situation because everyone here doesn't believe he is that poor guy getting chucked out because his wife rejected him blah blah blah.

He fucking cheated and is pissed because you want an std test! How very dare he. I think you should not cancel and still go, but so should he. He won't though will he, you already know this.

Ah so he wanted to have his cake and eat it, and now that he can see that isn't going to be the case, he is twisting things.

You still are going to your therapy session on Friday? I do think that this is very very necessary now.

MsDogLady · 23/02/2021 07:07

You were not responsible for protecting his fidelity.

He is full of BS. If he had issues in your relationship, he had several ethical options to use to deal with them, including communicating with you, couples counseling, or ending the marriage. He chose infidelity. He wanted to pursue OW, so he did.

While you were at home caring for your vulnerable DD and the other children, he was out living a wild party lifestyle like a single man. Instead of being your stay and support, he let all of you down massively.

He is not truly remorseful. Yes, he was full of self-serving drama initially, but his anger, blame-shifting, lack of empathy and proaction, and rejection of your recovery requirement show that he is not committed to helping you heal and restoring your trust.

There are more secrets. For one thing, he is minimizing his relationship with OW. She expected him to leave you for her. This suggests that they were conducting an EA prior to having sex, with most of their interactions occurring during the work day and nights out (since you say they had limited phone contact). He had mentionitis and commented how funny she was and how well they got on. He was flattered. They likely bonded emotionally and he confided in her. He would have told her things about you, your marriage, and the children. I don’t believe for a minute that the purpose of his several calls to her after their assignation was to express guilt. This liar is lying.

Something triggered his sudden confession, and it wasn’t remorse. Perhaps OW or someone else in the know has been in touch and he panicked. Or perhaps this is an exit strategy.

Whatever his agenda is, he needs a sharp consequence. You don’t have to tolerate his toxic presence or his drinking.

GeordieGreigsButtButtZoom · 23/02/2021 07:20

@sal1223

I'm going to cancel it and get him to get tested
They'll still know!
GeordieGreigsButtButtZoom · 23/02/2021 07:21

And you'll presumably have to rely on him being honest about his results, which I wouldn't trust.

Don't cancel it, just do it. It is all confidential and the staff there will have seen EVERYTHING before. They are completely non judgemental. In the nicest way, they don't care.

SirChing · 23/02/2021 07:27

@The6thQueen

In a world where divorce is accepted and not frowned upon, I know I felt judged (by myself and others) for staying when my husband had sex with a work colleague. It’s almost like choosing to not leave is more shameful than walking away. However, it’s no one’s business but yours. This is your marriage and only you know if you can live with this. Being angry and hurt are normal, desperately clinging to him is normal. Your response (no matter what it is) is justified. I recommend the Ted talk and book by Esther Perel. Both helped me hugely - I also found out about 18 months after the event had taken place and found that hard to deal with and process. She may help you too. You’re welcome to pm me if you wanted to talk Flowers
This ^. It IS okay to stay if you want to. It's also fine to end things if you feel you need to. I too would recommend counselling via relate. They are excellent at how to rebuild trust in these situations. I don't think I could walk away for a one night stand, without trying to save the marriage first. But that's me, not you Flowers
SirChing · 23/02/2021 07:29

Oops, thread has moved on a lot. Sorry Flowers And yes, get your STI test.

Fluffycloudland77 · 23/02/2021 07:31

If he can’t be trusted to keep marriage vows can he be trusted to keep a clinic appt? 🤨

Just go. Protect your health.

RealisticSketch · 23/02/2021 07:47

You could book a test at a clinic instead of

RealisticSketch · 23/02/2021 07:54

The doctors if you wanted to avoid the people you know. I think doing the test will give you peace of mind and also help you process what you're dealing with because it's a hard reality not the circular conversation you're stuck in.
Maybe he is getting defensive cos he feels he's being hung out to dry without any attempt to look behind what he's done... But you can't do that alone, if he was a complex tortured soul at the time he needs to examine that, with you so you both understand the forces at work. If he was neglecting you and that caused the lack of intimacy he needs to see that it he can't take on board his role he played in getting himself to the point he was unfaithful.
Lack of intimacy is a symptom of a wider problem, the rot doesn't start there does it. If in his mind the story behind and ends with that then he isn't going to have the capacity to resolve this. 😔

RealisticSketch · 23/02/2021 07:55

'Or' he can't take on board his role, that should say

QwertyGurty · 23/02/2021 07:56

As PP have said, it sounds as though he wants an easy way out, he wants you to be the bad guy and end it. He ought to stop being pathetic and take some ownership. You need some space from this man just to get your thoughts and feelings together.

sal1223 · 23/02/2021 08:14

I know and I will it's just too early - if I cancel appt then no one will be processing anything and no one will be contacting me with results that will sit on my file . I will get tested just not yet I can't face it . He's been like Jekyll & Hyde since telling me - I love yous this morning and I am sorry blah blah
I said how dare you be fucking mad I've sought some anonymous advise on the internet , when you weren't happy you put your dick in someone else 👍

OP posts:
Biscuitsanddoombar · 23/02/2021 08:17

I’m sorry that PP predictions turned out to be accurate OP

He isn’t actually prepared to do “anything” to save your marriage, he’s not going to do anything at all

Far from cutting ties with ONS woman, he’s been bleeding down the phone to her about how haaarrdd it all is for him, poor poor him, I mean FFS!!

He is trying to make you the bad guy and blaming you for his cheating, well fuck that!

I think you need space from him, you can’t think whilst he’s pouring all his DARVO nonsense in your ear

It doesn’t matter if he pulls the “I wanted to stay but she kicked me out” crap because if he truly wanted to save the marriage, he wouldn’t be saying that people. He’d be giving you the time you need. If he DOES start saying that then it’s quite obvious he didn’t want to save it in the first place.

Garlicinyoursoul · 23/02/2021 08:31

@sal1223 Please just get tested!
Never mind what others think, if you do separate people will whisper then too, fuck them. Look after yourself, because your disgusting sorry excuse for a husband hasn’t bothered.
If you really don’t want to do it via GP at least look for a local sexual health or GUM clinic, I know different areas have different provisions for this though, so have a Google.

Anna12345678910 · 23/02/2021 08:32

He felt guilty and so shared with you and now you are devastated. Would you have preferred he didn't tell you. Does he feel better now he has told you or regrets it.

Many people in this situation have been able to move forward together. What you do is personal to you. Take time and then sit and chat and decide what you want to do.

SameToo · 23/02/2021 09:03

So he risked your sexual health and is now mad at you for taking responsibility for your own health? To the point he’s shamed you into thinking about cancelling.

He sounds very manipulative.

Puzzledandpissedoff · 23/02/2021 09:17

You don't need the GP for an STI test, Sal - your hospital will do it, and you can request that they don't notify your GP (you can even give a fictitious name if you wish)

I'm wondering if his reluctance is the result, not of worries about confidentiality, but because he's worried they'll find something. As many of us have said all along there's likely to be a great deal more you don't know and this could blow it wide open

Please don't worry about actually having it done either; my own was at the hospital and I've genuinely never known a kinder, more empathetic group of women - which perhaps isn't surprising given they see this all the time

Sonicbloom · 23/02/2021 09:36

I can’t believe he’s worried about what other people think! He wasn’t worried about that the night he shagged a work colleague . In a work people situation - he wasn’t worried about taking illegal drugs. He wasn’t worried about being blind drunk. He wasn’t worried about you or his children. He doesn’t seem to worry much about other people when it benefits him.
Personally, I think he should get an std test - let him go through the uncomfortable situation. Let him arrange it if he’s so bothered about the gp. He can phone them back to reconfirm the results so you can hear.
I don’t understand why he phoned ow afterwards. If you were guilty - the last thing you want to do is engage with that person who reminds you of it. It’s all very odd and I do wonder if there is more to this story.
What are you thinking op?

Sonicbloom · 23/02/2021 09:38

Btw std tests for women are fine and not uncomfortable. I’ve had it before and went to a gum clinic

MegaClutterSlut · 23/02/2021 09:41

Yes many people have moved forward together BUT that's if the cheating spouse does everything in their power to save the marriage. Ops husband really isn't and unless he does its never going to work. He has a shitty cba'd attitude. There is only one person battling to save this marriage and it isn't him

sal1223 · 23/02/2021 09:43

He says because they were friends and he had no one else to talk to - I'm back to tearful today . I don't want my kids coming from a broken home, it will damage them and my youngest certainly won't understand where daddy has gone which will be a huge upset - I trusted him enough to have children with him and now he's done this. I don't think there's more info to come out - I think he's told me everything , it doesn't matter if you all don't think that's true based on your own experiences . He's frightened and so am I and yes I know he should have thought of that before he 'put his dick in her' but it's done now and has changed everything. As long as he still works where he does , in the same click with all the lads with their drink / drug habits and local pub I can't see how I'd ever move on from this because it'll be the same life

OP posts:
sal1223 · 23/02/2021 09:45

The kids have heard us rowing now , with the kitchen door shut but still feel awful about it. My eldest shouted stop shouting 😖 setting a fine example arnt we

OP posts:
FossilisedFanny · 23/02/2021 09:49

You say you don’t want your children to come from a broken home but you are doing more damage to them by staying together and arguing.

RealisticSketch · 23/02/2021 09:50

If you are expected to understand that then he should be able to understand you talking to people on here - we all need to talk to someone when we're in turmoil.
He put himself in the position of doing something crappy enough so the only person he is able to discuss it with is the very same person he betrayed you with, this is hardly going to give him a good steer through his murky waters, especially when she was aware of his domestic situation and clearly didn't have a problem with it.
He needs to consider whether the reflection she was going to bring to his dilemma was going to be helpful, if he can now see that it would not have been the best place for him to go, can he see that a counsellor would be - as in neutral, objective.
And given that he did that, I hope he has apologised he was angry with you (as this crashes into your lap from a great height) for seeking to get to grips with it here.

Garlicinyoursoul · 23/02/2021 09:53

Your home is already broken now, regardless of who lives there, and it is absolutely not your doing.
It is better to grow up in two homes where there is love, respect and no arguing, than come from one where parents bicker, resent and walk all over their spouse.

You’re not doing the children a favour staying when you don’t want to and showing them it’s ok to be belittled by your husband. Not even just the cheating, but the aftermath and his shit attitude.

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