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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

It's a Parking One

572 replies

ILoveFlumps · 10/02/2021 08:00

Ok mumsnetters I need some ideas.
I popped out for 10 minutes this morning and come home to a random car on my driveway (outside my house). This is private property and allocated parking for a New Build. The Main Street it's off is permit parking only - this car has a permit.
The only place I can park is blocking it in causing a semi obstruction which I've done.
Police won't help as a civil matter.
Note has been left on the car by me telling them it's private property.
What else can I do?! Immediate neighbours have no idea whose car this is. Angry

OP posts:
Original poster
ILoveFlumps · 10/02/2021 17:56

@MissMarpleDarling

Are you usually at work then op? As he thought you would be? Bet he's parked there before and that's why he knocked on at your neighbours as he thought you would be out at work.
I am at work a lot of the time yes. Today was a rare day at home. He probably did park there before.......I did wonder if he waited for me to leave and then parked straight there not expecting me to return so quickly.
OP posts:
QueenoftheAir · 10/02/2021 18:03

He wasn’t sorry, he was sorry he had been caught

Exactly. And he expected to be able to give a half-arsed apology - which wasn't really an apology actually - according to the OP he said

"yeah, err, I was in a rush and I didn’t realise ... I thought you were at work and I wasn’t going to be long"

Entitled.

mumwon · 10/02/2021 18:21

op I think you were in the right & he was in the wrong (& I am glad you said this!)
At the very least he should have left a note with his phone number so he could be contacted in case you needed to go in
nb op has issue with ankle & he doesn't know if she is disabled - has a lot of shopping etc

Veterinari · 10/02/2021 18:23

Then also meant I had to postpone a work zoom call whilst I moved my car later on. So yes, it did affect me.

Would you still have had to postpone your zoom call if you'd just quickly moved your car (2-3mins max) rather than deliberately keeping him waiting for 10 minutes and then insisting on Ignoring his multiple apologies in favour of a long conversation aimed at humiliating him?

No of course he shouldn't have parked on your drive. But your response was needlessly petty and unpleasant.

ArchieStar · 10/02/2021 18:29

@Christinaismyperson I used to work in care, 2 hours is a long time.

Entschuldigung · 10/02/2021 18:29

I'm with you @ILoveFlumps

My car was blocked in by someone for over an hour. I was really frustrated as was trying to drive my son off to University. We knocked on lots of doors but no one knew whose car it was.

Eventually someone in a nurse's uniform turned up and started to get in the car. She shouted a cheery, "Sorry!". I was really annoyed and told her so. Apparently she thought it was fine to block me in because she couldn't see anywhere else to park. I pointed out we live right next to an industrial estate where there's loads of parking. She said she didn't know the area. Confused

I said the least she could have done is put a note on her dashboard with her number on or the number of the house she was going to but she really couldn't give a toss.

Whythesadface · 10/02/2021 18:31

Why who force the man to park there,,,, HIM.
The chat would have been 2 mins MAX.
We have a right to demand someone who trespassed realise they did wrong.

Your making excuses for Bad behaviour by the man,

RuledbyASD · 10/02/2021 18:32

@ILoveFlumps

Me: (opens door) I assume that’s your car that’s parked on my drive?
Him: Err yeah, I’m really sorry
Me: But it’s my drive?
Him: yeah, I’m sorry
Me: but this is private property?

I really don't get this bit. He's apologised twice and you still say "but this is private property"

Were you expecting him to turn back time, OP?! You do realise that's not possible, right?

You were goading him for an argument and you know it

Cheeseismymiddlename · 10/02/2021 18:35

Bad Car. That made me laugh . Grin thank you .

LongDistanceClaret · 10/02/2021 18:38

Penguin bollard

Original poster
ILoveFlumps · 10/02/2021 18:44

[quote RuledbyASD]@ILoveFlumps

Me: (opens door) I assume that’s your car that’s parked on my drive?
Him: Err yeah, I’m really sorry
Me: But it’s my drive?
Him: yeah, I’m sorry
Me: but this is private property?

I really don't get this bit. He's apologised twice and you still say "but this is private property"

Were you expecting him to turn back time, OP?! You do realise that's not possible, right?

You were goading him for an argument and you know it
[/quote]
No. I was trying to emphasise the fact he parked on my property. His apologies weren't heartfelt, they were words.
I don't like arguments or confrontation. But I dislike arrogant people who think they can do what they like more.
What I do know is that I'm not apologising for the telling off he got and deserved. I could've been a lot harsher on him, so don't presume to tell me what I was or wasn't looking for as you haven't a clue.

OP posts:
LadyPoison · 10/02/2021 18:49

He was very lucky it wasn't my drive. I'd have blocked him in then taken the dogs for their usual walk - generally takes the whole morning anyway and I wouldn't have been rushing them back

78percentLindt · 10/02/2021 18:58

@Entschuldigung

I'm with you *@ILoveFlumps*

My car was blocked in by someone for over an hour. I was really frustrated as was trying to drive my son off to University. We knocked on lots of doors but no one knew whose car it was.

Eventually someone in a nurse's uniform turned up and started to get in the car. She shouted a cheery, "Sorry!". I was really annoyed and told her so. Apparently she thought it was fine to block me in because she couldn't see anywhere else to park. I pointed out we live right next to an industrial estate where there's loads of parking. She said she didn't know the area. Confused

I said the least she could have done is put a note on her dashboard with her number on or the number of the house she was going to but she really couldn't give a toss.

Yep, I have had similar -with a MH nurse . Car parked on my drive- but I have a shared entrance, so he parked partly on my grass to let my neighbours pass- so that was OK then!. The excuse was that he didn't know the village and thought it would be OK. He had no excuse- no parking restrictions on the road and an empty layby opposite us. He was really put out that I asked him why he thought it was OK to park there and tried to justify his action. He was with someone who tried to shut him off. I complained to his Trust, got an apology. TBH it was his attitude that made me follow up with them.
BloggersBlog · 10/02/2021 18:59

Well handled OP. Only emergency services have the right to park wherever they want. He will have more respect in the future. If he had got away with it it would make him think he can park anywhere and caused problems for other people with his sense of entitlement.

ittakes2 · 10/02/2021 18:59

I would be livid if he was on my drive but at the same time I would not have been so condenscending to him. Getting a kick out of a power play is not so cool. Being a carer he was likely to be worried about some elderly or disabled client needing help so he can't be such a bad person. It wasn't like he was parked there to go to the pub!

Whythesadface · 10/02/2021 19:05

Why do so many of you have a problem with someone getting caught.
Why do you make excuses for them?
Why do you try to turn it so the injured party is too blame?
Maybe take a nice look in the mirror, and realise you may be guilt of being selfish and this is your way of trying to pretend there is an excuse for doing wrong.
Hint : there is no excuse...

evouk · 10/02/2021 19:07

I went out my front door once and saw a small black car on my driveway behind my car. Confused I asked partner if it was his friends as one friend has a small black car. No it wasn't

We knock next door and it's a carer visiting elderly ndn. We explain that she's parked on our drive and blocked us in. She said she thought it was ndn's driveway Confused

It's clearly separated by a large hedge. We had another carer park totally across the drive on another occasion so we had to park behind them. Society nowadays doesn't care and just looks after themselves, to hell with others

Sparklingbrook · 10/02/2021 19:16

injured party

The drama is really ramping up. Grin I don't believe there was any injuries unless there's something we don't know. Shock

StamfordHill · 10/02/2021 19:18

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

Pericombobulations · 10/02/2021 19:19

I'm disabled and this thread has reminded me that so many people's attitude is terrible. He didnt know if the OP needed to park on her drive, if she was disabled and could'nt park further away. He was lucky not to receive worse from the OP.

And for those saying 2 hours is normal for carers. Its not. My dad had a carer, my MIL still has a carer. Niether had/s them for that long. However they were given a tiny window to get from one call to the next one. That is the business'es fault. Those with more care needs tend to be in homes, because they can not function anymore in their home.

The attitude of some on this thread reminds me why so many people park in the disabled spaces with "I'm only going to be a minute". Often me with my blue badge manage to do what I needed and leave before them. And yet they still do it. Hardly anyone cares anymore for anyone else, and the attitudes of some on this thread confirms that. Those that think he was right to abandon his car where-ever and not care about the owner. And yes I agree I bet he has done it before.

I've come home to find my drive full of stuff for next doors renovation. Next door didnt mind they were inconvenicing me. The builders said a quick sorry. But I struggled to get from my car to my front door due to it. And I would also have blocked him in, and yes he would have had to wait for me too as I am now very slow to move (but still able to drive).

Rant over!

GabriellaMontez · 10/02/2021 19:22

He didnt give a shit. You were absolutely right to make your point. I hope it discourages him from bring so rude in future not just on your drive but wherever else he thinks he can get away with it.

Sparklingbrook · 10/02/2021 19:27

Just because I'm not completely furious at what he did doesn't mean I personally would park on someone's drive or in a disabled space.

If I came back and someone was on my drive I would be a bit shocked too, because it's a bit of a weird thing to do.

He was totally in the wrong and I get that, I just though the resulting long conversation was totally unnecessary and a bit cringey to read.

There are ways to talk to people, and all the 'teach him a lesson' stuff I found a bit Hmm.

Justa47 · 10/02/2021 19:27

@ILoveFlumps

He was full of BS period.

MissLucyEyelesbarrow · 10/02/2021 19:37

As a key worker, I'm excited to hear that so many MNetters think I can park wherever I like. Can you DM your addresses, so I know where to leave the car?

PPAK2 · 10/02/2021 19:42

So much drama for a 2 minute inconvenience.

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