What would happen to my partners money if he dies and we weren't married?

[grannyinapram]

Not a huge amount but we are saving for a house so he has a couple of thousand in his account and I have the same in mine.
We have dc and have lived together since being teens.
But getting married is a hard one because althoufh we are enganged, we don't want to get married yet. The 'wedding' isn't happening until after we buy the house anyway because we don't want to waste money on a crappy affair when we are renting.
Priorities and all that. Covid has pushed both further out of our reach.

I was just reading the will thread where the husband won't write one and it made me wonder what will happen to our money if we died?
We aren't even 30 yet so it seems a little presumptuous to write a will, however DH (not yet lol) has a fairly dangerous job so I'm always worried of the 'what ifs'

I was under the impression that when he died I could just go on his phone and put all the money in my bank and close the account, and vice versa. However I'm not sure now. is that legal? would anyone else have a claim? does it go to our kids? no idea.

If you haven’t got wills but the only ‘assets’ you have is cash savings in the bank the best thing to do would be to put the savings in a joint account. This was if one dies the other one keeps all the money without need for a will at all. The half share passes under a concept called “survivorship” to the surviving joint owner.

Another reason to so wills is in case you both die leaving kids so it’s worth considering doing for that reason.

@Chimeraforce @IlonaRN getting married doesn't automatically change your name. It provides a marriage certificate which you sign in your 'maiden' name (you don't sign anything in a 'married name') which can then be used to easily change your name on passport, banks etc. But you dont have to do that, many of us don't these days.

All goes to the children as you are not married and there isn't a will (assuming you are in England).

It would be completely illegal for you to transfer money to your account and close it. You don't have any entitlement to any of the money held only in your partners name.

Given your question about "would anyone else have a claim", I guess your DP has family? They won't usually have a claim because the money goes to the children, however I'd expect someone to take a keen interest in the assets being divided up fairly and anything dodgy like the transfer of all money into your account to be find out you'd stolen it pretty quickly, after all transactions are timestamped and a massive transfer in the minutes / hours / days before death would be suspect!

Get wills sorted. ASAP.

Also registry office weddings aren't expensive - why not do that and then do big party later on when you have more cash?

Legally you are diddly squat to each other.

In not sure you could even dictate where he is buried or how it would be his mum? Dad? Sister... They all have precedent over you, or dc over 18.

Can't get death certificate... Nothing.. Without that you certainly can't empty accounts... You need to also be an executor...

You'll be grieving and having the double blow of being legally treated like a total non entity in his life.

I'm amazed that there are still people out there who only see a will as an old person thing.

The most important time to have a will is when you're unmarried but have children together. LIkewise life insurance. I hope you've both got that, too.

Priorities and all that
🙄
Maybe you need some.

@Nohomeschoolingtoday

I have a friend who sadly lost their partner in a car accident. They didn’t have children - but his Mum took the money they had been saving in his savings account to buy a house quite a substantial amount sadly :( as there was no will & the mother wouldn’t even give her half the money. Caused a lot of anger a will would have made all the difference.

That’s absolutely shocking.

My sis’s fiancé of 20 years has endless excuses on why they cannot possibly get married. However, my dsis works, and a better job than her lazy fiance, and would quite frankly be better off without him.

@Snowsnowglorioussnow

Legally you are diddly squat to each other.

In not sure you could even dictate where he is buried or how it would be his mum? Dad? Sister... They all have precedent over you, or dc over 18.

Can't get death certificate... Nothing.. Without that you certainly can't empty accounts... You need to also be an executor...

You'll be grieving and having the double blow of being legally treated like a total non entity in his life.

Yep. All that is true too. You won't have the power to do a single thing about his death. His family will have the legal responsibility and your wishes will not be taken into account unless they are prepared to listen to you.

We aren't even 30 yet so it seems a little presumptuous to write a will,

If you have children, you really should have a will.

We even have a will writer on MN @Mumblechum0 https://www.marlowwills.co.uk. We did it all remotely by phone, talking through what we wanted to have happen in different scenarios.

You can always update it in years to come.

www.citizensadvice.org.uk/family/living-together-marriage-and-civil-partnership/living-together-and-marriage-legal-differences/

Read this & get yourself down to the registry office and get the legalities down. It's daft that you're prioritising buying a house before getting married, you have kids so protect them by getting the legal paperwork.

www.gov.uk/inherits-someone-dies-without-will/y/england-and-wales/no/yes

If in E&W then his account will be frozen and then his assets put in trust for the children. Nothing would go to you without a will or marriage/civil partnership.

It is incredibly irresponsible not to have wills in these circumstances. Failing to write a will doesn't make you immortal.

And op please don't think your in the safe category now that it will automatically go to the kids, so therefore kind of yourself as well. Remember the children won't have access to the money until 18 years of age

Go to a registry and get married. You can have a fancy wedding later. You are more secure this way than just a will

No offence to you op but really every one should be taught these basics before they leave education.

Thanks guys. None of these things are relevant yet (no saving/joint account) but obviously they will be very soon. He’s divorced.

If he has a 'dangerous job' it's daft not to have a will if you're not married. Get one done by a solicitor who will sort it remotely for you. Otherwise you'd be totally stuck.

@saraclara

I'm amazed that there are still people out there who only see a will as an old person thing.

The most important time to have a will is when you're unmarried but have children together. LIkewise life insurance. I hope you've both got that, too.

Or that their 'partner' is 'common law spouse' or shacking up with someone confers any rights.

It will bring up all kinds of problems.
Any death in service, pension or union payouts will not come to you ( these might all be small amounts but when you are paying for a funeral and trying to stabilise your life and finances, they will really help.
You will not be eligible for widows’ bereavement award .
You will not receive the death grant ( around 2000) that again helps to pay for a funeral.
You have no protection. A will will help with some of the above but not all.

It isn't presumptuous to write a will at any age because life's only certainty is that all of us WILL DIE at some point. I'm a solicitor and our private client department deal with some really high net worth clients for property, trusts, financial planning and a shockingly high number won't make a will because they don't want to think that they "might die". well, no shit Sherlock!

Plus would you consider a quickie civil partnership for extra financial security and next if kinship. You don't have to make vows, wear rings, change your names or even tell anyone (the last 3 are also true of a register office marriage). You can always have a "wedding" in a few years if you still want.

It would be whatever his will says. If he doesn't have a will, you would have a right to absolutely nothing. Zilch. 'Common law' is not recognised in the uk. I am not a legal expert but I would think anything he owns would be go to his children. But if they are under 18, I assume his parents would be the next of kin , so you would not even be able to make decisions over the funeral, medical, bank accounts etc etc.

For your own safety, either get married or get Wills done by a good solicitor.

Seriously look on CAB page and get clued up. People say oh I’d do anything for my children but that includes making sure they are ok if things go wrong. You need wills and he needs to nominate you for death in service payment if he dies etc. Have you got a decent income you aren’t entitled to bereavement support payments for example as you wouldn’t be a widow.
Obviously marry or not whichever suits but be aware of legal implications.
My daughter year 10 has had one phse lesson on this that’s it.

This is all very helpful. Due to COVID our wedding isn’t for another two years but because of my age we are ttc now. If ‘hopefully’ I get pregnant we will nip out for a registry wedding 😁

Yes I was just coming on to say that if he has a pension he needs to nominate you as the beneficiary. You also need to do the same for him in case of your untimely demise.

Good grief, if you won't get married a will is an absolute must. How can people be this ignorant.

You're never too young to write a will.

I wrote my first when I was 21 after reading that if I didn't it would go to my parents and I didn't want my father to gain from my death. And I had very little to leave.

What about his death benefit at work
His pension
His ‘share’ of the house?
His car or belongings?

It’s not just his savings

You won’t have a say in his funeral - unless his family agree
You won’t be able to make a decision on hospital care - that will be his next of kin - probably his parents unless stated otherwise

You need to get married or see a decent solicitor about wills

Wills can be contested