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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Valentines for kids

229 replies

Hufflepuffmamma · 04/02/2021 22:46

I am preparing for High Roasting.

I am fairly new to MN. I can imagine this has come up before ?

Just mentioned to husband I’m going order to order the kids valentines teddies. I get a cheap like pound shop assortment for them each year literally about 3 quid each. Obvs this year will need to grab online.

He’s laughed abandoned thinks it’s the weirdest thing to do. I honestly never considered it to be weird that I get them something cute for the day.

I always feel weird on valentines excusing the kids and them not having anything .. but I feel like I’ve just realised this is ridiculous ..

YABU:- Totally weird and first world that you would consider valentines for kids being normal. You need better boundaries.
YANBU:- It’s a bit of fun . Harmless . I get it .

Please .....don’t roast so much it’s awkward enough to realise you might have ridiculous parenting ideas ...

OP posts:

Sirzy · 04/02/2021 22:48

Personally the idea of buying valentines for children doesn’t sit right with me.

PurpleDaisies · 04/02/2021 22:48

This is such a weird thing to do.

fimimifi · 04/02/2021 22:49

YABU! Very weird thing to do. How old are your children?

TheSpottedDog · 04/02/2021 22:50

I’ve just ordered my dogs boyfriend a valentines card from moonpig so I’m probably not the best person to pass judgement 😂

Gardenista · 04/02/2021 22:51

I’m a lone parent and my 5 year old is super excited about Valentine’s Day, she’s made cards for me and her aunts and uncles, her aunt is baking her a heart shaped cake and we will do lots of heart themed crafts as she likes crafts and I am buying her some love heart sweets. Kids love any excuse for a celebration

TheFaithfulBorderBinliner · 04/02/2021 22:52

Is there not enough unloved junk in your house ?
Say 2 kids times ten years is twenty things to buy, store, clean?

LizzieMacQueen · 04/02/2021 22:53

@spotteddog your dog's boyfriend or your boyfriend's dog?

Sammiesnake · 04/02/2021 22:53

We always celebrate Valentine’s Day with the kids - it’s just a bit of fun! We don’t take it too seriously, go out for nice meals and things all the time as a couple anyway, we are happy to spend Valentine’s celebrating all together. Plus the kids get far more joy out of some cheesy themed fun than we would!!

WayTooSoon · 04/02/2021 22:53

It's a day to celebrate the love you have for people. It doesn't have to be romantic love, I think it can be any love. My dad always wrote a nice card to my sister and I. I've bought cards and flowers for my friends. I think teddies for your children is a lovely idea.

LizzieMacQueen · 04/02/2021 22:53

Oops meant @TheSpottedDog question above.

To you OP, bonkers idea.

PoptartPoptart · 04/02/2021 22:54

Valentines is traditionally a ‘romantic’ day for couples. It’s for adults, not kids.
The thought that we have to ‘include’ children in everything just so they don’t feel left out is ridiculous.

Landlubber2019 · 04/02/2021 22:55

Not something I would be wanting to do, as young children they are happy with a cheap teddy but in a few years there will be an expectation and a cheap teddy won't cut it, expect a request for a computer game at £50 or trainers at £100.

Christmas was 6 weeks ago....

Just be careful what you start.....

SymphonyofShadows · 04/02/2021 22:56

FFS, this place gets weirder with every year that passes

checkingforballoons · 04/02/2021 22:57

I write DS a cute card and get him something like a heart shaped lolly. It makes him happy, I don’t care if it is silly. I take every opportunity to fill him up with love.

NannyR · 04/02/2021 22:58

I would consider it weird too. If you really want to involve them in a commercialised "special day" then why not do something simple like making a heart shaped pancake or something for breakfast, costs very little and shows that you've gone to a bit of effort.
It's the consumerist, throw away aspect that doesn't sit right with me - buying pound shop tat, that will end up in landfill eventually.

RaininSummer · 04/02/2021 22:58

I think it's a bit odd and an unecessary taking over of an adult day but guess within families it does no harm. Trouble is the card companies and supermarkets will jump on it soon and turn it into a commercial expectation.

DemolitionBarbie · 04/02/2021 22:59

Getting them a present is mad.

We'll be doing some heart-themed craft and maybe a red-themed teatime spread because you've got to get your kicks where you can in lockdown.

Stompythedinosaur · 04/02/2021 22:59

I get my dc a little something. They like it and I like to do it. I don't think it's a big deal.

Original poster

Hufflepuffmamma · 04/02/2021 23:00

I’ve got an age range of kids age 17 ,10,8 do fine it with all of them... @TheFaithfulBorderBinliner lots of junk.. my attempts at being more eco- ethical are a whole other thread...

@PoptartPoptart yeah I’m realising this .....

I’m Still annoyed at my husband for outing me and ruining my fun ( also not sure why he’s only just noticed - I do it every year )

OP posts:

OloBo · 04/02/2021 23:01

I’m not generally a fan of Valentine’s Day full stop. It’s been a long January this year though. I’m doing heart shaped craft/baking/whatever to inject a bit of excitement to the monotony of lockdown for them.

I wouldn’t buy them gifts though.

CouldItBeJeffrey · 04/02/2021 23:01

We always get something for the DC. We don't really celebrate it as a couple anymore we buy something for the kids. Last year they got a rose and some chocolates each and they were delighted. We just treat it as an "I love you" day where people tell people they love them. It's not a romantic day in our house.

Original poster

Hufflepuffmamma · 04/02/2021 23:03

@NannyR

I would consider it weird too. If you really want to involve them in a commercialised "special day" then why not do something simple like making a heart shaped pancake or something for breakfast, costs very little and shows that you've gone to a bit of effort. It's the consumerist, throw away aspect that doesn't sit right with me - buying pound shop tat, that will end up in landfill eventually.

I make heart shape pancakes aswell usually...

Yeah I’m easily led into consumerism .... I wish I could say different ... I need to probably review this weakness... it is sad.

OP posts:

WorraLiberty · 04/02/2021 23:03

@SymphonyofShadows

FFS, this place gets weirder with every year that passes

Doesn't it just.

And what even is a 'high roasting'?

Anything above gas mark 7?

UndertheCedartree · 04/02/2021 23:04

My mum used to always get me something like a choc heart lolly or a heart candle on Valentine's just to remind me how much she loved me. My toddlers always did Valentine's crafts. I've done crafts at home with my craft mad DD. Same as my mum I always get my DC a little something. Can't see the harm in spreading a little love!

JustDavesWife · 04/02/2021 23:04

My kids are 6 & 12 and I've always bought them something, normally a love heart chocolate lolly or something so nothing major. My 6 year old loves it and we have always just said it's a day to tell people how much you love them. I asked my 12 year old if he still wanted me to buy him something and he said he's not bothered but he'll take chocolate if it's being offered!!

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