To want to hear about those kids/teens who are stoically getting on with lockdown

[DuchessFerrara]

Not taking a pop at young people with SEN or MH issues. It must be heartbreaking to watch them endure the isolation and frustration of lockdown.

I would like to hear about the DC who, like my Yr11, don't feel as though their lives have been decimated. Aren't aggrieved to be making sacrifices for the "oldies". Don't feel their education has been wasted because their exams have been cancelled.

I'd love to hear about those DC who are knuckling down to their studies without too much complaint, are optimistic for the future and are - for the most part - pleasant to be around.

Well, mine (16 and 18) seem to be doing ok, but both have had wobbles (and tears) that I did not see coming

They don’t complain, but the other day you get DS was low and said he’s bloody lonely and misses his friends and school (we’ve been in tier 3 between lockdowns for a lot of it, and his sports have been cancelled all year apart from 4 or 5 weeks in September/Oct.

We live in the sticks, so it feels more cut off somehow

I really worry about them at times , about their entire generation tbh, I don’t think they are quite as aware as we, the oldies, are about the price they are paying and what lies in store (massive financial crisis and no jobs )

All three of my dc are working hard, with no intervention from me (except needing lunch and a couple of snacks a day). They miss school life and miss their friends but they’re motivated to do well at school and all three schools are good at giving merits / well-done letters which have made them feel their work is appreciated.

My 16 year old is pretty accepting . Misses sports. Is always on the Xbox with his mates . The hardest thing is getting him up in the mornings

We live next door o the best friend of my 10 year old daughter so they can play out most days or go to playground together. She is a bit moodier than usual though.

I’m finding it harder than them - miss the gym !

Yr 11 DC is just getting on with it, he's bored and wants to see his friends in person, but in general has a happy disposition and quite laid back.

in contrast
yr13 was doing ok but recently has started to sink into depression.

@Whitecup4

It’s easy for them to get on with it when they are given unlimited screen time with their mates!!

Try doing it without the screen babysitting and then see how easy they get on with it!

Why would you take away their only contact with friends during lockdown? What purpose would it serve?

DC would like to be socialising having movie nights and so on with their friends, but very positive and seem to be making the most of the different scenario.
Positives:
getting up 2 hours later - they now get themselves up where as before it took much stress getting up in the morning
No long bus journeys to and from school
Long leisurely lunches all together as a family
Have had far more time to craft
Have started running challenge
More time to read
School in PJ's
Have time to make choose and help make dinner
Dinner is earlier

So many, many positives to their lives at the moment.

Their main negative (as they explained at the weekend):
No chance of school being closed and having a 'snow day' !

Yeah, my 10 year old daughter is ok with it. As in, she has said that she's lonely. But she gets on with her schoolwork without any fuss and is still nice company. Whereas as I'm getting increasingly annoyed (and probably annoying)

Mine are fine. A few wobbly moments though.

Actually all the children I know are doing fine. I genuinely only see parents describing their children as struggling horrifically here on MN.

My daughter with Ptsd and ASD is far better in lockdown. Mine are coping fine on the whole. Of the 4 one is finding it a bit harder but overall doing fine.

My son 17 and daughter 16 are delighted to not be sitting exams! They love the relaxed mornings as they don't have to get to school and college. No problems at all really.

My two are just-13 and 10, and to them it's a bonus that they don't have to travel into school. My oldest (yr 8) hated the school bus so we'd been driving him to and from school previously. The youngest likes his sleep so doesn't have the 10 minute walk to school although he doesn't focus as well and we like him to complete all tasks so his school day tends to be longer just now! They both have lots of friends that they play with online and are happy. But it's very different to the summer when they were able to go swimming with friends every day. Roll on the good weather. At least there might be snow and a bit of tobogganing at the weekend ♥️

My son is in year 11. When he was isolating back in the autumn term her was alone in the house day after day and his MH was not great.

Now we are all home, he’s very happy. He’ll joke and laugh with his mates over the computer; he’s up to date with his studies; he’s predicted all As and A*s (Wales) and has had teachers calling him to ask him to study their subject at A level. He’s proud of himself and I’m very proud too.

My two year 11’s are doing really well, so proud of them and our family. Actually we have a good time. They study and they chat . We all get on and watch some tv and chat. Good times staying in.

My dear foster child has learning disability and goes to a special secondary school. He loves learning and loves school. He even loves to do homework. He is going into school every day getting on with his learning despite on 2 children in his set going into school and very few logging into their lessons. He patiently waits whilst teacher has to go back over previous lesson as only 4 pupils did lesson. He also has a tutor for Maths, English and Science each week at his request as he loves learning new things and wants to do.as best he can in his exams next year. He struggles a lot with English but does not give up and is very willing to go over things several times until he understands. We are so proud of how he is coping when most of his friends are.mot coping. And he Teams chats his friends to try to keep them from getting down some evenings as he is very caring of his friends. I have heard him explaining fractions to one friend who can't get his head around them. He was explaining it to his friend step by step, exactly as his tutor explained it to him. He is very spotty and especially good at cricket. He was told he was to have an England trial for the Learning Disability Access cricket team in November just before we locked down. He has had to wait to have it now but he has not grumbled about it once.

Mine seem ok. I think.

DD11 is doing ok. Likes the relaxed mornings and is getting on with schoolwork pretty well. She's got into a good routine and catches up with friends online in the evenings.

It's good to see that there are lots of children doing ok. It's not ideal for any of us but there is so much talk about parents feeling broken and children suffering with mental health issues that's it's refreshing to hear that lots of children are coping.

My dds (14 and 13) and ds (10) are doing ok. Ds has complex needs and has been shielding for most of the year.

My DS12 is loving it. ASD. No problem. He has accepted it, end of. I let him play his on line games whenever he wants, to break the boredom. No strict schedule, no strict rules, just going with it. It really works. I have no fear about his mental health. He has said that "when these crazy times are over" can we go to the cinema, swimming pool, zoo, etc. He is resigned to the facts, which feels like he has been brainwashed a bit, if that makes sense.

My 2 are grand. They're 5 and 8 though, but seemingly couldn't be happier to stay at home.

I teach teenagers and honestly it's such a mixed bag. Some are fine, others I've had to get extra support for them. Some don't turn up or hand their work on, I mostly let it slide (apart from a "hope they're ok" with the parents) as is our school policy right now.

Two 12 year olds and a 9 year old are doing fine. They arent busting their asses doing school work, bare minimum really but i am OK with that. They do lots of other stuff. We live in a village so friends are nearbyand they can get out and see them, if it ever stops raining.

I was quite sad at the first lock down as they missed so many rights of passage to do with being primary school leavers. Residential trip, school concerts and the big send off. But they werent bothered at all. I was gutted!
In a way they don't know what high school is like as it's all been so unusual. But again they take it at face value and just go with it.

I think the children really struggling are in the minority actually.

I would imagine posters don’t want to post here about their children not struggling for fear of being jumped on. But pretty much all the kids I know are doing fine.

My 18 yo, all his friends, my sister’s dc and all of their friends. All different age groups.

My mum’s next door neighbour’s kids...

Obviously we all go through stages of being fed up, but I really don’t think all children are struggling as much as the media want us to believe. In fact I suspect they will only push that agenda while trying to tell us all schools should be open again. Once they are the media will be saying schools were opened too soon...

My eldest is five and is having a great time. Enjoying the lie-ins in the morning and the later-than-usual bedtimes, and getting to spend more time with her toddler sister. She's a positive little thing anyway though, happily gets on with her school work and will spend hours playing with her toys or doing puzzles. The only things she misses are cookss school dinners (!) and soft play. Most of my friends children seem to be the same, just quietly getting on with it.

• cooked school dinners.

It’s all a matter of perspective really isn’t it.

I could say my DC age 5 and 8 are doing fine - they get on with their work, mostly. They enjoy some of it - they have lovely teachers which helps. They have online chats with their friends (8 yr old more than 5 yr old). They are mostly pleasant to be around. So in that sense they fit the OP’s criteria.

However. In the past week things have gone downhill a lot. The 8 yr old is crying at bedtime a couple of times a week. The 5 yr old used to be incredibly outgoing but now won’t speak on zoom calls and hides behind me. They are arguing more and more often. 8 yr old’s temper has got worse and she’s been having nightmares. 5 yr old has started saying school work is boring.

So are they fine or not? Outwardly they may seem so since they are doing the work and mostly behaving ok. But I don’t think they are.

I have 2 children. One is visibly struggling- anxiety, insomnia while the other appears to be coping fine. I worry about them both equally. Battling on and coping may mean bottling things up. I know that's how I deal with things. I think many more are being affected, it may just be further down the road for some before this comes to light.