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AIBU?

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Original poster

Who does this gift belong to?

344 replies

BabyofMine · 02/02/2021 12:10

A group of work friends buy a gift for another work friend.

One work friend (not me so as not to drip feed!) organises it, collects the money, orders the item and is going to deliver it to the work friend.

Because of some mess up with the company, the company send the organiser a nearly duplicate item worth basically the same, as an apology for messing them around so much etc.

Whose is second duplicate gift from the company?

YABU= belongs to the organiser
YANBU= belongs to the person the original gift was meant for

(The YABU/NBU choices were random btw - I genuinely don’t have an opinion either way, I am one of the “contributors”)

OP posts:
BlackAmericanoNoSugar · 02/02/2021 16:41

I think as the company have specifically stated that it's for inconvenience caused then it's for the organiser. Can the people kicking up a fuss itemise the inconvenience that they suffered and how it outweighs the inconvenience that the organiser suffered? (I doubt it.)

SunsetSenora · 02/02/2021 16:43

If it were me I would have a draw with the names of the people who contributed and pick one to get the duplicate. or I would let the organizer have it because they did all the work.

justanotherneighinparadise · 02/02/2021 16:43

I’d say legally it is the organisers as she had the contract with the company, but morally it belongs to all those who contributed. So if there’s been a fall out from the organiser keeping the duplicate I can understand it.

SoupDragon · 02/02/2021 16:44

morally it belongs to all those who contributed

How?

Harryfrog12 · 02/02/2021 16:44

Absolutely the organiser. I am so thankful when someone takes something like this out of your hands because lets face it if it wasnt for this organised person then nothing would be happening at all.
I always seem to be the one that sorts family stuff and the last couple of years ive completely backed away from it as people take the piss with it and just expect it sorting for them

Whythesadface · 02/02/2021 16:53

So having reread this as was confused.
A group decide to donate money for a gift for Jill.
Jack is the person collecting the money.
XYZ company mess Jack around , finally send the gift for Jill, but send Jack a similar gift as a sorry present.
The sorry present belongs to Jack.

WitchesBritchesPumpkinPants · 02/02/2021 16:53

If it was an accidental duplicate or sent as a 241 I'd agree with some of these suggestions.

However, it was sent to the organiser as an apology for the hassle, who the original item was for is irrelevant, as is who paid for it!

I'm not sure how this is even a question tbh

MrsKoala · 02/02/2021 16:55

@SunsetSenora

If it were me I would have a draw with the names of the people who contributed and pick one to get the duplicate. or I would let the organizer have it because they did all the work.
But it’s not a duplicate, it wasn’t sent in error and then gifted by the company apropos to nothing. It’s not even a gift in any form, and I think referring to it as such as pp have done muddies the water here (it is just coincidentally the same item that was originally purchased as a gift - which is irrelevant). It’s simply an item which the company have compensated a customer with to apologise for poor service. There is no connection to the group at all - why should they get something for nothing while the intended recipient, who deserved compensation, gets nothing?
JaneJeffer · 02/02/2021 17:01

When you see organiser written down so many times it starts to look weird!

BluebellsGreenbells · 02/02/2021 17:09

Would she have kept a refund instead of a gift?
Because it’s sterling.

I think the organizers should offer a partial refund for those who contributed abs effectively purchase the item for half price.

SurvivalIsInsufficient · 02/02/2021 17:11

I think the organizers should offer a partial refund for those who contributed abs effectively purchase the item for half price

That's a joke right? You can't possibly be serious.

Dasher789 · 02/02/2021 17:17

definitely organiser. why did they even say they got a second one?! they were given a free gift because of the inconvenience they suffered

ScalpHelp · 02/02/2021 17:19

If the person concerned placed the order in their name and personally dealt with the company, the free item is theirs. It doesn’t matter that the initial payment for the first item was group funded. The rest of the group aren’t actually affected, are they? The end result is still the same, the recipient gets their gift.

It might be a bit annoying seeing someone get something for free in this situation, but I wouldn’t say that the others who chipped in have any claim to it.

SoupDragon · 02/02/2021 17:19

Would she have kept a refund instead of a gift?

That is not the same thing at all.

Panozzo · 02/02/2021 17:22

The item from the company was compensation for the hassle endured so it belongs to the person who endured the hassle - the organiser. I can't see how it could be viewed any other way.

StellaDendrite · 02/02/2021 17:24

@SurvivalIsInsufficient

I think it’s a bit cheeky of the volunteer to want to keep it

You cannot be serious.

Ohhh guess what? 👀👀 I am serious.

If I were the organizer I wouldn’t dream of keeping it.

Would you actually keep it?

Being messed about by the sellers warrents a moan but I’d still work out a way to distribute the windfall or give it to charity.

Clymene · 02/02/2021 17:25

The apology gift is to the person who ordered it and was messed around. The fact that it's a very generous apology is neither here nor there. The organiser probably shouldn't have told everyone who had chipped in a fiver

BabblativeBean · 02/02/2021 17:30

BluebellsGreenbells "I think the organizers should offer a partial refund for those who contributed abs effectively purchase the item for half price."

The company felt that it had inconvenienced the organiser to such an extent that they should give her a gift.

Why on earth should the organiser give money to those who donated in order to be able to keep her gift? Why do you think the donators should make a profit from this situation?

ScalpHelp · 02/02/2021 17:33

If this is genuinely going to sour relations at work long term, the easiest thing may be to reject the 2nd item

NoIDontWatchLoveIsland · 02/02/2021 17:35

The organiser dealt with the hassle so they keep it.

yogamatted · 02/02/2021 17:36

Definitely the organiser who did not need to mention the extra one at all, nothing to do with anyone else if it was an apology for all the inconvenience to her.

CSIblonde · 02/02/2021 17:36

The organiser was the one who did the work & who they messed around, so them. The recipient of the gift hasn't lost anything. The people who gave £ had no hassle or work involved.

SurvivalIsInsufficient · 02/02/2021 17:37

Would you actually keep it

Of course I would, it was for me!

You want the person, who ended up with loads of hassle where you had none, to PAY YOU money to keep a gift that the company gave them personally to say sorry. You think the organiser should be out time and effort and also pay you to keep her own gift?

Like I said, you're joking. Or you're insane.

ScalpHelp · 02/02/2021 17:47

It’s a weird goodwill gesture from the company. If you ordered eg a toaster, why would they give you another free toaster (that’s contingent on you keeping the first toaster) as most people wouldn’t want two.

Was it a situation where the company sent the wrong item to begin with, and told the purchaser to keep the wrong item and the ordered item?

guffaux · 02/02/2021 17:48

This happened at my work- small sums though- 40 quid raised for birthday flowers, company balls up delivery, (They got the flowers, but didn't know who sent them, )
In the end the organiser got the 40 quid back and gave it to the birthday girl, who used it to put towards taking out a very select few team members for lunch- didn't include the organiser who'd done all the running about and sorting out the refund.

Those of us in the non-selected group thought the organiser should have kept the money and bought goodies for the full team

Organiser got no kudos from birthday girl or the rest of the team ( [embarassed] feel a bit rotten about that) she -didnt organise anything again Grin