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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be annoyed that my sister has sent me postal flowers and....

151 replies

Overseasmom100 · 01/02/2021 23:31

Every year for my birthday my sister sends me postal flowers from a high street shop and every year they turn up either half dead, or nothing like the pictures online. Every time she ends up complaining and every year makes me feel bad shes wasted her money usually £35-40.

Last week she said I'll send you some flowers and we had a conversation that not to bother as they arent great usually...and a card would be lovely etc...

So today a box turns up flowers stuffed inside...mainly dried up and very poor in fact I dont think they will last 2 days. I thank her by text... she asks if they were lovely and for photos...I send her photos ...she goes all funny and annoyed that they arent good...and so it starts again...this has been going on for ar least 5 years.

OP posts:
ineedaholidaynow · 01/02/2021 23:33

Why hasn't she tried somewhere else?

Ponoka7 · 01/02/2021 23:33

Could you suggest something that you would like instead? I'd rather not do presents and I hate getting flowers, but some people won't take no for an answer.

LouiseTrees · 01/02/2021 23:33

She’d be better sending chocolate.

Beforethetakingoftoastandtea · 01/02/2021 23:34

Grin do you think she enjoys the drama?!

WagnerTheWehrWolf · 01/02/2021 23:34

That sounds tiring. Tell her to send you some nice letterbox flowers via Bloom and Wild next time.

Ledkr · 01/02/2021 23:36

Bloom and wild have also turned up half dead for me twice

CounsellorTroi · 01/02/2021 23:39

Why won't she get some delivered to you from Marks & Spencer, she could get a lovely bouquet for £35-£40 from there.

Original poster
Overseasmom100 · 01/02/2021 23:39

She doesnt listen....it's annoted me all day sounds dreadfully ungrateful of me but what a waste. Thing is where we live is a lovely florist...she knows that. I said you would be better off ordering from them as you know they would be perfect.

Last week I said please donot send me any flowers in the post (high street clothes shop who do flowers in a box) I stressed the fact...she agreed.

Every single year!!!

OP posts:
NoSquirrels · 01/02/2021 23:43

Which ‘high street shop’? I’m sorry - sounds stressful. Can’t you recommend her a local florist? They’ll all be happy to make a bouquet up to the value she requests.

Alternatively just make sure to take a picture of a lovely bunch next time you get some from elsewhere and recycle the photo to your sister when you need to...

NoSquirrels · 01/02/2021 23:43

X-post. She’s mad then. Just refuse to send the photos!

Gumps · 01/02/2021 23:44

I hate flowers and I have told my family and friends this many times yet they still buy me them. I don’t know why! My DH sent some last time he was away and they were mainly lollies which I had to bin as we have two cats. He asked fir a picture and was gutted because they looked pants. The card even said I know you hate flowers but I sent you these anyway ConfusedGrin

Original poster
Overseasmom100 · 01/02/2021 23:44

It's drained me today...text back and forth about them...just like last year and the year before and...

OP posts:
Rege · 01/02/2021 23:45

I’m surprised she’s sending flowers costing £35-£40 that are half dead on arrival. Never experienced this before. Who does she use?

Arobase · 01/02/2021 23:47

Last week I said please donot send me any flowers in the post (high street clothes shop who do flowers in a box) I stressed the fact...she agreed.

Ask her why she sent them despite having agreed not to?

Next time, how about sending her a link to something you really want that she can buy online and get sent direct to you without hassle.

WagnerTheWehrWolf · 01/02/2021 23:48

Is she playing some kind of long-term mind game with you, maybe to avenge a teenage wrong you committed against her?

DigitalChristmas · 01/02/2021 23:48

Next year just take the photo off the website and send that. She can’t complain they don’t look like the online photo then.

Original poster
Overseasmom100 · 01/02/2021 23:48

I know why do people send them when you dont like them or tell them not to!!! It makes them feel better ... thing is shes one of those people who buy you what they like...send you what they like...

Ive told her about the lovely florist where we live...she knows!!!!

I told her the boxed one are pre packed and sat there for days even a week...they are not picked fresh for every order...so annoying

OP posts:
CorianderBee · 01/02/2021 23:51

It's probably because she complains and they refund her the money. So it's like she got you a present but didn't have to actually spend anything...

Pipandmum · 01/02/2021 23:52

Do YOU call the florist and complain? I would. I'd take photos snd send it to them asking them to refund the money (or whatever).
As for your sister- why do you think she cannot grasp what you are saying? Seems odd.

Original poster
Overseasmom100 · 01/02/2021 23:52

I asked her that why send them...
"Because I wanted you to have something nice"...what will happen now ....happens every year. She will complain...they will resend another type ..plus put in a voucher or something...she will text several times to update me....it will go on for days...it's draining...I dont have time for all this crap... JUST DONT SEND THEM TO BEGIN WITH!!!!!

OP posts:
LouiseTrees · 01/02/2021 23:53

@CorianderBee

It's probably because she complains and they refund her the money. So it's like she got you a present but didn't have to actually spend anything...
Ooohh the plot thickens. I agree this a possibility
DigitalChristmas · 01/02/2021 23:53

Just thinking outside the box,does she have a credit account with the store? Might explain the reluctance to go elsewhere.

LouiseTrees · 01/02/2021 23:54

@Overseasmom100

I asked her that why send them... "Because I wanted you to have something nice"...what will happen now ....happens every year. She will complain...they will resend another type ..plus put in a voucher or something...she will text several times to update me....it will go on for days...it's draining...I dont have time for all this crap... JUST DONT SEND THEM TO BEGIN WITH!!!!!
Just tell her “ but they never are nice, why don’t you use the local florist like I said, don’t you trust them? “
NoSquirrels · 01/02/2021 23:55

@CorianderBee

It's probably because she complains and they refund her the money. So it's like she got you a present but didn't have to actually spend anything...
A-ha...
ILikeToMoveItMoveItILikeToMove · 01/02/2021 23:56

This sounds incredibly tedious and pointless! Any chance you could refuse to accept delivery of the bloody things next time?!

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