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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be annoyed that my sister has sent me postal flowers and....

151 replies

Overseasmom100 · 01/02/2021 23:31

Every year for my birthday my sister sends me postal flowers from a high street shop and every year they turn up either half dead, or nothing like the pictures online. Every time she ends up complaining and every year makes me feel bad shes wasted her money usually £35-40.

Last week she said I'll send you some flowers and we had a conversation that not to bother as they arent great usually...and a card would be lovely etc...

So today a box turns up flowers stuffed inside...mainly dried up and very poor in fact I dont think they will last 2 days. I thank her by text... she asks if they were lovely and for photos...I send her photos ...she goes all funny and annoyed that they arent good...and so it starts again...this has been going on for ar least 5 years.

OP posts:
skodadoda · 02/02/2021 08:18

@Arobase

If she does it again, refuse to engage with the request for a photograph, and tell her it's because you really don't want to engage in this ridiculous game any more.

Also stop sending her flowers - it seems to make her think she has to reciprocate.

This
AuntieStella · 02/02/2021 08:24

This is the sort of ridiculousness which you could both revel in, and make a happy family memory about.

Tease her FFS - ask playfully what she keeps doing it, when she knows what will happen. Joke about the consistent shitness, and admire her ability to maintain hope over experience.

Then next year, talk to her about the 'traditional dead flowers'

Now perhaps she'll stop. But if she doesn't, at least you'll have turned it into a positive.

Goldieloxx · 02/02/2021 08:27

Letterbox flowers aren't great, Marks and Spencer and Waitrose are always good, but the best ever flowers I had were from Moonpig, lasted ages

Wyntersdiary · 02/02/2021 08:37

To be honest if she is asking for photos I reckon she is refunding them and that's why she needs the picture and that's why she sends a load of oh nook messages. To pretend she really is angry about it and how dare they be so bad. Give me voucher/ refund please etc etc

Rainn21 · 02/02/2021 08:40

Some people have mentioned Bloom and Wild. They’ve been absolutely terrible every time I used them (twice, the second time was because I had a refund from the first awful bunch) and received them (twice unfortunately)

HopeForTheBestExpectTheWorst · 02/02/2021 08:42

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn on request of the poster.

speakout · 02/02/2021 08:54

Post them on to her.

ErrolTheDragon · 02/02/2021 09:00

How about rather than persisting in trying to get her to use a better florist (or M&S, they're pretty reliable) can suggest you'd really love something that lasts a bit longer and ask for a potted flowering plant. Orchids are really easy and last months - lots of online choices, again inc M&S.

shitinmyhandsandclap · 02/02/2021 09:04

Can't you tell her to send you vouchers instead? Do you buy her things she likes?

Anniegetyourgun · 02/02/2021 09:14

its lovely she wants to send you flowers

Not if the recipient has asked her not to!

VinylDetective · 02/02/2021 09:15

Next time send her a picture captioned Dead. Again. And refuse to engage any further. I swear by Bloom and Wild, I haven’t sent or been sent a dud box yet.

MzHz · 02/02/2021 09:28

@Overseasmom100

She doesnt listen....it's annoted me all day sounds dreadfully ungrateful of me but what a waste. Thing is where we live is a lovely florist...she knows that. I said you would be better off ordering from them as you know they would be perfect.

Last week I said please donot send me any flowers in the post (high street clothes shop who do flowers in a box) I stressed the fact...she agreed.

Every single year!!!

Oh we had monstrosities send by OH mother this year.

They were awful. Ugly and also Half dead. They’re the same price as M&S too. I got a M&S bouquet sent to us last summer and they lasted for WEEKS! We had letterbox flowers I think from bloom and wild once and they were amazing too.

I’d never buy flowers from Next.

BuggerOffAndGoodDayToYou · 02/02/2021 09:29

Every delivery of letterbox flowers I’ve received have turned up looking dead. Trim the stems put them in water with rather food and two days later they always look amazing. My most recent bunch still looked great after 3 weeks (with regular water changes).

The enclosures always explain this but I do wonder how many people just look in the box, see what they think are awful flowers and chuck them out. When I send them to someone for the first time I always warn them and they usually send me a photo a few days later of their fab looking display.

MrKlaw · 02/02/2021 09:32

save the messages about it in a screengrab or paste into a word doc. Then just post the entire thing next year along with the message 'here you go, thought I'd save us both some time'

Cherryberrypies · 02/02/2021 09:32

My postal box flowers I got for my birthday arrived looking very limp and lifeless. I followed the instructions and they hydrated themselves again and I had the most gorgeous bunch of flowers. They lasted for 3 weeks too.

Oldbutstillgotit · 02/02/2021 09:36

My DB sends me flowers every year from M and S and they are always stunning . Suggest that ?

Itsnotlikethiswithotherpeople · 02/02/2021 09:37

Off point... but my friend sent me a £20 gift card with a card with flowers on saying sending you virtual flowers and this little gift. It was very sweet and tbh more useful than £20 flowers which is ‘cheap’ for flowers but actually a lot to spend on something disposable and not that great.

TheSockMonster · 02/02/2021 09:40

Is she a forgetful sort?

I have sent Next letterbox flowers before because I’ve suddenly realised it’s someone’s birthday or anniversary the next day, and it’s 9pm at night, and Next are literally the only website still offering next-day delivery Blush

52andblue · 02/02/2021 09:40

I like Bloom & Wild too (though agree they are underwhelming till they wake up, then they are fab and last for weeks with proper care).

OP I too wonder if your sister keeps using the same Co for the refunds?
OR there is some longstanding childhood issue that these flowers 'say'?

waddlemyway · 02/02/2021 09:41

How long does your phone go back? Can you do a search to find the old texts and send her screenshots of all the times you have asked her not to do this? Gaaaahhh... so annoying. And thoughtless on a number of levels.

AwaAnBileYerHeid · 02/02/2021 09:43

As a pp has said, I bet she gets a refund on them. That'll be why she wants the photo, so she can send it in to complain!

Viviennemary · 02/02/2021 09:54

I agree with telling her to try Bloom and Wild. I've had them a few times and was surprised how nice they were and how long they lasted.

MsHedgehog · 02/02/2021 10:20

Just to check, have you followed the instructions? I've had letterbox flowers before and they are limp and dead on arrival but look fresh and in full bloom within a couple of days in the water. Always amazes me.

JaniceEvans · 02/02/2021 10:25

Bloom and wild postal flowers are great...

Send her some good ones for her birthday so she can see a good brand to buy from if she really wants to send flowers.

Also recommend postal brownies instead!

islockdownoveryet · 02/02/2021 10:25

Well if she hasn’t learned her lesson by now I’m not sure what more you can do .
She has 2 choices go elsewhere to buy flowers or not to send flowers at all . If she keeps up with this just say ds I’ve said not to bother but you insist if you insist again and you get upset that they are half dead will you please stop ordering flowers from this shit company .

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