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Original poster

The Incel Movement (TW)

139 replies

pissofficiallyboiled · 01/02/2021 11:36

NC. Wasn't sure if this was right board (was debating putting it on Feminism) but hopefully this is fine.

Has anyone heard about this Incel movement? I had heard the odd thing about it, but I've been reading a forum on another site - don't want to link it or I might get the post deleted - and the things that have been said have been fucking abysmal.

(Trigger warning here) An example being: "Females only have one worth and it's making babies. If a foid [female humanoid, used to indicate that women are subhuman] can't give birth, she's nothing more than a fleshlight".

For anyone who wants a bit of a TL;DR, Incels, a portmanteau of "involuntary celibates", are members of an online subculture who define themselves as unable to find a romantic or sexual partner despite desiring one.

Not read many incel-specific threads on here, but to be honest it's really boiled my piss. Hope I've done the right things with the trigger warnings, wanted to start a conversation around this but hoping not to upset anyone!

OP posts:
BrumBoo · 01/02/2021 11:56

It's a bigger issue than feminism, though obviously affects women and girls. It's growing as a culture, especially amongst teenage boys. Teacher are being trained to look out for 'incel' behaviour. Unfortunately, in this ever increasing misogynistic world where sexism against women is not only ignored, is often celebrated, it's getting more and more difficult to call out this behaviour.

Ikora · 01/02/2021 12:01

I know about the incel movement its been linked to some murders. It has its own entire language, is online and woman hating. It also has some far right links. The visceral hatred displayed by incel forums online towards women and also to a lesser extent towards ‘Chads’ who are men seen as Alpha and successful with women is petrifying.

MechantGourmet · 01/02/2021 12:06

Incels aren't really MN demographic, hence not that many threads on the topic.

I think maybe it's a bit reductive and lazy to use a term like incels though. People behave badly everywhere, not necessarily down to their inability to find a partner.
People that have misogynistic views should of course be taken to task over them.

technically I am currently involuntarily celibate, not misogynistic in any way though

Original poster
pissofficiallyboiled · 01/02/2021 12:10

I think maybe it's a bit reductive and lazy to use a term like incels though. People behave badly everywhere, not necessarily down to their inability to find a partner.

Do you mean reductive and lazy on their part by using it as their predominant label, or on mine for referring to them as such?
I agree using that terminology to encompass involuntary celibate people who aren't misogynistic is wrong, I'm just using it as it's how they've chosen to identify!

OP posts:
Whatsnewpussyhat · 01/02/2021 12:17

I think maybe it's a bit reductive and lazy to use a term like incels though

It's their term that they use for themselves.

Yes OP it is a massive problem.
They are also hijacking the trans movement. They're the ones who who send the death and rape threats and get away with their misogyny because it's woke.

MechantGourmet · 01/02/2021 12:18

I'm sorry. "Incels" label themselves as such?

MechantGourmet · 01/02/2021 12:19

X-post!
I apologise, I did not realise that.

MedusasBadHairDay · 01/02/2021 12:20

I've been reading Men Who Hate Women by Laura Bates, it's all about groups like incels and it's a disturbing read.

I think maybe it's a bit reductive and lazy to use a term like incels though.

It's a term they self define with, they organise around it.

CaraDuneRedux · 01/02/2021 12:21

Yes.

It's a form of online radicalisation which can lead to domestic terrorism (see for eg Elliott Rogers) and should be taken as seriously as any other form of online grooming which can lead to extremist radicalisation.

While most of them are harmless knuckle draggers, a small percentage are very dangerous indeed.

Original poster
pissofficiallyboiled · 01/02/2021 12:21

I know about the incel movement its been linked to some murders.

Just looked it up Ikora, incels (or members of the community) have been linked to at least six mass murders Sad

I'm sorry. "Incels" label themselves as such?

They do, yes! I think it started off on a forum for support of involuntary celibate people, but misogyny took over.

OP posts:
TheMobileSiteMadeMeSignup · 01/02/2021 12:23

They label themselves as incels when really, if they were genuinely nice people who gave a fuck and put in a bit of effort they might actually find someone. But they expect supermodel women as girlfriends so any regular woman falls short.

They are not involuntarily celibate, they are disgusting misogynists who no woman should ever touch.

BrumBoo · 01/02/2021 12:25

I think maybe it's a bit reductive and lazy to use a term like incels though. People behave badly everywhere, not necessarily down to their inability to find a partner.

But incels are a specific subgroup who's views are stemmed from the fact that they believe they are owed sex from women but don't get it. It begins small with girl/woman rejecting them, and snowballs into a dangerous ideology. Add in the internet and you have a very dangerous subculture where men convince each other that women should know their place, which is to be nothing more than breeding/fucking machines. It encourages other negative social traits, often mixed in with far-right ideology.

It needs to be recognised for what it is, not pretend that 'well there are many bad people out there'. The sooner young men realise they're not entitled to any woman, or sex, the healthier-minded adults they hopefully will become.

Rowenasemolina · 01/02/2021 12:26

Not worth the oxygen that would be used up giving any space in your thoughts to them

DedlyMedally · 01/02/2021 12:28

The incel movement was started by a woman iirc. It originated in a forum where people who struggled to find sexual or romantic partners would converse and commiserate with eachother.

Unsurprisingly, it's a movement that attracts a lot of people who feel hard done by and most of them will be men. I'm not sure what you can really do though.

Some people will just struggle in that avenue of life and they will have negative feelings about it. There are plenty of "incel" groups which actively try to distance themselves from the hateful and sometimes violent arm and I think that it's good that such groups exist.

Original poster
pissofficiallyboiled · 01/02/2021 12:29

Not worth the oxygen that would be used up giving any space in your thoughts to them

I agree with you to some extent, but I also think open conversation and rebuttal of how (frankly) apeshit and dangerous this community is is important. If no-one is discussing the damage caused by this community, it's much easier to paint themselves as the misunderstood underdog, as they try to.

OP posts:
dreamingbohemian · 01/02/2021 12:30

Yes, they are incredibly creepy and terrifying, it is absolutely a form of online radicalisation that can lead to violence. There is a significant overlap with the rabid Trump base too, the kinds of people who stormed the Capitol.

I think it's helpful to have a name for it because I certainly met a lot of guys when I was younger (in the US) who blamed their lack of relationships on women being evil bitches, rather than their own failings. Who would stalk and harass women who rejected them. We were just supposed to put up with it, at least now it's being taken a little more seriously.

dreamingbohemian · 01/02/2021 12:32

x-post with you OP

I totally agree, it's a very dangerous ideology and we need to openly combat it, not just write it off as typical bad behaviour.

babbaloushka · 01/02/2021 12:40

Yes, it is terrifying. Seems to begin with the Nice Guy mindset- I.e. I'm a really nice guy, why dont women want me, which snowballs into degradation and then proper incel culture.

HoneysuckIejasmine · 01/02/2021 12:41

I also think it's not ok to write it off as grumpy men whining to each other. People are being murdered by self identified incels. Not people who rejected them (as if that would be any better) but random mass murder attacks on any woman who happens to be in the area. Terrifying stuff.

Triphazards · 01/02/2021 12:42

A chap who can't get a girlfriend should not seek out and keep company with other chaps who can't get a girlfriend.

HighHeelBoots · 01/02/2021 12:43

It needs bringing out into the open and challenging
You can see the Incel language creeping in to everyday
Amnesty have said every disabled person has a right to have sexHmm
No person has a right to sex because it depends on having a willing partner

gannett · 01/02/2021 12:43

I don't think people quite realise how easy it is for young men to be radicalised in this way online. Not always the full-blown rabid misogynistic stuff immediately but there are so many gateways to that via common sexist stereotypes that can really suck insecure teenage boys/20something men in by playing on the fact that they really want to know how to get girls, and have no idea how to or any success.

This rhetoric is really common on bodybuilding and sports forums.

o8O8O8o · 01/02/2021 12:46

I feel that this movement is in part backlash against women's increasing autonomy in modern culture, few people will relinquish power willingly, power corrupts and men have had too much of it for too long!

sadonfriday · 01/02/2021 12:49

Laura Bates has just published an excellent book on this and other connected issues, it’s called Men Who Hate Women. I urge caution as some pets are upsetting but it’s truly essential reading. She infiltrated these communities online and the results are terrifying.

sadonfriday · 01/02/2021 12:49

*parts