Would you date someone shorter?

[radiateforme]

I'm going for a socially distanced walk next week with someone I met on tinder and have been chatting to for a short while, (yes it is allowed and he lives round the corner from me!). Problem is I think he might be shorter than me! I'm about 5ft8 so not small. I've always dated tall men. I'm not sure if it will bother me but I'm nervous it'll be awkward! I haven't asked how tall he is as don't want to turn it in to a thing but he looks short in his social media photos. Has anyone here ever been on a date with someone shorter? Am I incredibly shallow to worry about this?

[Notnt]

I agree with this, I don't think it would have been fair for me to try to overlook that I don't find men being shorter than I am to be attractive, and feeling awkward about it while trying to pretend it wasn't an issue.
It's a non issue now as I have a long-term partner, but personal preference can't really be helped. My son is projected to be 6ft 4 according to his height percentile, baby on the way (also a boy) is already longer than average and on partner's side of the family the men are all well over 6ft, so ironically I'm destined to be the short person in our household. 🙈

[tatutata]

I dated someone shorter and 2 stone lighter than me. I was totally in love. One night we got drunk in the college bar, and I picked him up and swung him round, for a laugh. I got dumped the next day!

[Branleuse]

I am not sure id like to go with someone a lot shorter than me, but if it was just a little bit, or same height, then not really an issue. Ive dated someone shorter than me before and my partner now is roughly same height as me and its a non issue. Things dont have to be your absolute preference in order to be ok. I really do find it odd how certain physical characteristics can be dealbreakers. I find it about the equivalent of liking brown hair so wouldnt date a blond. Obviously you like what you like though,

[Notnt]

My quote didn't work, I was agreeing with what @theleafandnotthetree said!

[lucywho123]

My DP is about an inch taller than me (I'm 5'7). I'd only ever dated men 6 foot and over and normally only ever went for much taller guys. But DP is the love of my life. So im glad I wasn't hung up on the height thing when it came to him

[BeastOfBODMAS]

Just go for the walk and see if you find him attractive in person. His height might not be an issue, but something else might be.

I once dated a bloke off the internet who was 6’6, good looking, well dressed, impeccably mannered, interesting and filthy rich. He also had a high pitched squeaky voice and, as it turned out, a fiancée 🤦‍♀️ You never can tell until you meet!

[Oatsamazing]

I'm 5'11" and height was always a priority for me. I met someone through work 2-3 inches shorter, but it's miles better than any relationship I've had before I now feel silly for writing people off because of their height. I'd give him a chance

[moonfacebaby]

I’m not sure I could date someone shorter than me. However, my DP is only about an inch taller than me, so in heels, I am taller (I consider that cheating though, as bare foot, he’s obviously taller).

Does it bother me? Not at all because I bloody adore him and fancy the pants off him. It’s been a revelation really - I’ve always felt tall for a woman (5ft 7), and I’d have said I prefer taller men. I guess it’s down to meeting an amazing man and then height isn’t as important.

I’m also older (49) and I’ve done my fair share of dating and when you find a really good man, who ticks virtually every other box, then you don’t care as much about a minor detail like height.

[Annabell80]

I was with my ex for 7 years and he was 5"6 and I'm 5"10.
It wasn't an issue at all. If he's a nice person and you get on well his height shouldn't be an issue.

[FlowersAreBeautiful]

It would depend on the man. If he was insecure about it and made digs about wearing heels making me slightly taller than him, then no. This has happened to me and I'm not that tall - 5' 6. But if the man wasnt bothered and confident it wouldn't bother me at all as long as it was only a slight difference

[gannett]

Yes you can't help attraction but it's ridiculous to rule out someone who might not be your ideal type. I always went for brunettes... but have ended up with blond DP. Also a lot of the anti short man stuff isn't based on attraction, it's based on "we would look ridiculous", "what would people think" - which I'm afraid to say is extremely shallow.

The other thing that makes short man threads on here so weird is that unlike every other "type" MNers are weirdly, vocally insistent that they could never, ever date a shorter man and in fact are completely disgusted by them. You don't get these threads about men's weight, hair colour, muscles.

If a male friend preferred women with big tits, say - fine, whatever. He can go for whomever he wants. But if he went on and on at length and tried to justify why he'd be completely unable to even consider a smaller-breasted woman - well, I'd think he was uncouth, shallow and basic, and I wouldn't want to be around him.

That's how I feel reading this thread.

[Iknowwhatudidlastsummer]

You don't get these threads about men's weight, hair colour, muscles.

Of course you do.

And the same about women. You hear (from men AND women) that a strong and toned woman is really attractive just as much as you hear that they're too "masculine" and "muscles are ugly on women"

And start something about "ginger"!

It's fine to have a type. It's not fine when it's no longer about a personal preference and attraction but it becomes abusive and bullyish.

I don't find short men attractive 🤷 I am confident a lot of men don't find me attractive either. It's fine, plenty others do - including DH

[Triphazards]

Oh yes, I'm not that shallow.

So long as they're not shorter of money.

[rainbowdaz]

I'm 5'4 and once tried to dare a man who was same height, and even though he was gorgeous, I remember his hands being smaller than mine and it gave me the ick

--

Yep, small hands and pecker etc. Would definitely put me off too! But these things aren't always related to height. I'm very tall and my partners hands and feet are the same size as mine, he's heavier and stronger than me. Don't have a squeaky voice and all the rest of it.

It's just luck of the draw sometimes!

[Judystilldreamsofhorses]

I'm 5ft 6, and grew up with men over 6ft, so always felt anyone under that was "short". However I did have a thing with a guy who is 5ft 3 - I knew him really well, and gradually became attracted to him based on his personality. It didn't last, but it wasn't because of his height.

I've now been with DP for over 10 years and he's 6ft 5, so we probably look just as odd together!

[tootsytoo]

@gannett I agree with your post completely!

[pippapoo62]

I am 5 ft 4 inches tall. My husband is 5ft 2 3/4. Never bothered me in the 15 years we have been together, he has a good heart and is really lovely to me .

[ginandwineandbaileys]

No, I'm 5ft5 and wouldn't.

[TiredUselessHopeless]

I’m 5’9 and I’ve been with 6’2 DH forever so I’m possibly not best placed to comment, but I wonder if you potentially ruling out and losing out on great guys who could be perfect for you just because you’re hung up on height? If you really REALLY fancy someone then does it matter?

[OhCaptain]

No, I wouldn’t consider it. Gives me the ick.

DH is 6 foot. I’m 5’4”

Thinner - no
Fatter - yes but not by stones and stones
Different race/skin colour - yes

[Stinkywizzleteets]

Yeah. When we’re lying down it makes no difference. I also have arthritis in my shoulders and reaching up for a hug etc hurts.

[Givemeabreak88]

Nope absolutely not, I’m 5 ft 4 so not sure but average and even then I still never really come across men shorter than me, I was attracted to a man who was 5ft 9 and even that was too short! Even though he was taller than me he just still seemed small, (my ex was 6 ft 3) so I like much taller men not just a few inches. I don’t get why people get annoyed by what others are attracted to? Many men wouldn’t want to date over weight women so they also have their preference so no need to feel sorry for anyone!

[CounsellorTroi]

Yes you can't help attraction but it's ridiculous to rule out someone who might not be your ideal type. I always went for brunettes... but have ended up with blond DP. Also a lot of the anti short man stuff isn't based on attraction, it's based on "we would look ridiculous", "what would people think" - which I'm afraid to say is extremely shallow.

I completely agree.

[Givemeabreak88]

Not sure should be not short**

[Clawdy]

My gran used to say "They're all the same height when they're lying down next to you...."