to think that the effect on children's mental health is exaggerated?

[SmudgeButt]

Look I have no doubt that lots of kids are missing their friends, school, grandparents. And all of these things will effect their development and mental health. But is it really that bad a situation compared to other things in the past?? Or is it just that we talk about it a whole nauseatingly more?

I'm thinking that the current situation isn't a patch on the effect of living in a country that's at war - thinking back to WW2 and the effect of being suddenly shipped off to strangers in the countryside or even to a different country. Thinking of those children in Europe who suddenly had to fend for themselves in Jewish ghettos or concentration camps.

People that survived (yes a lot didn't as they were murdered) no doubt had lifetime impacts but so many of their children say "dad was always cheerful, never talked about what happened".

AIBU to think that in a few years kids of today will say "wow, that was weird and I'm glad it's over, now let's get one with life" ?

Saw this BBC article on the increase in children self-harming, and it reminded me of this thread.

I think there are wider systemic issues playing a role, there has been an increase for years (and it wasn't always well documented in the past to make a good comparison), but some of the reporting coming out... some parents may be exaggerating, and there should be some look into when children end up far better as there are many schools/systems failing that this has highlighted, but some of the things this and similar reports I've seen recently, I don't we can overstate the effects all the changes from this has had on some people, children included, as most of the systems and safety nets in their lives are struggling even more when not outright stopped.

@TakeTheCuntOutOfScunthorpe

While there are definitely some children who will be suffering, there will be others who have much better mental health because they are being kept away from the place they are bullied and abused by their peers.

I wish I'd had a period of lockdown when I was of school age - pretty much any time between 4 and 16, I'd have loved the opportunity to get away from the children who made my life hell and the teachers who didn't care. For me, home was safe, and school was dangerous (I was nearly killed twice by bullies).

I know there are other people where the opposite is true - they are actually safer in school than at home - but for balance, I think the positives of lockdown need to be recognised too.

OOooh. We can't talk about kids succeeding thriving or succeeding in life. That is a big no-no on MN. It enflames the parents who can't create that for their own children.

My nan was 3 at the start of ww2 and she has such find memories of it. The whole street pulling together and eating their evenings meals as one big household, the stream of people staying with them at their house. Even the getting out of bed and running to the air raid shelter was an adventure. Obviously we know the darker side to war but as a child she loved it. The two aren't comparable for so many reasons.

What I very sincerely hope is that the children of parents who are saying they're absolutely fine, really are absolutely fine - and feel able to share with their parents or their friends if they are not, to reach out for help and support.

So it doesn’t seem to me that the ‘resilience’ OP thinks is such a great quality actually served previous generations all that well
You're not comparing like for like though.
People use to steal to feed their families. Nowadays they steal for drug money. Also you haven't factored in online crime which was obviously inexistent before.

As for school, many would have given anything to continue but had to stop to work and earn money to support their family. All this required a lot more resilience.

I really don't get why some posters go in and in about justifying that this year has been very hard. No one is saying it hasn't been so. It's been very tough on the vast majority of people, some obviously more than others.

The issue is people turning totally normal feelings under the circumstances into pathologies warranting significant interventions.

Of course the situation couldn't be foreseen but unexpected difficult situations can happen at anytime.

It's much more helpful to support our kids by reassuring them that what they feel is totally normal, experienced by many under the circumstances, that it's ok to feel how they do and teach them ways to cope better rather than telling them that they are ill, worse than others, that they should feel sorry for themselves and expect everyone else to do so.

The main message is to say that times are hard for most people one way or the other, but that it will get better and it's just a question of time, and in the meantime, all we can do is our best to get through it with patience.

@Whoopsies

My nan was 3 at the start of ww2 and she has such find memories of it. The whole street pulling together and eating their evenings meals as one big household, the stream of people staying with them at their house. Even the getting out of bed and running to the air raid shelter was an adventure. Obviously we know the darker side to war but as a child she loved it. The two aren't comparable for so many reasons.

Yes. But the community spirit of everyone pulling together and eating their meals as one big family and staying in each others houses is a really over romanticised and trite comparison to make when any one of those things could result in someone's death, a someone killing the people around them, or someone landing themselves in jail for being a cunt. So no, there is absolutely no comparison to be made whatsoever.

I don't think posters are necessarily exaggerating regarding their own children's mental health. However, I think some are exaggerating the impact overall on children's health as part of their own agenda. Their intention is usually obvious by the fact that they simultaneously minimise the impact of Covid on physical health. The reality is that while not going to school will negatively impact the mental health of some children, the impact for others mental health will be quite positive.

I've got two DC, brought up exactly the same with the same experiences, exposure and opportunities.
DC 11 has gone back to school after experiencing a mental breakdown, banging his head against the wall, self harming, screaming, panic attacks, not sleeping - generally not coping with it all. DC 15 is loving life and would home school until the end of school given the chance.
Everyone is affected differently.

Wouldn't agree.

My children are doing so well and I'm very grateful for it but I have so many friends that are great parents with great partners and some of their children have found the past year very difficult.

The age group would be from 8-30 so right across the board.
Their struggles are from missing school, friends, sports, socialising, university, love lives, their office, their colleagues and family bereavement etc...

Some of them are very quiet and withdrawn.

It has been a difficult time for a lot of people for different reasons.

I really wish people would stop saying things like 'people use to steal to feed their families now it's for drugs' or 'knife crime is up' without anything at all to support their claim. A quick google is not hard ffs. Stealing to pay for drugs has been around as long as drugs have i.e. a really long time.

Children/people in general were not better in the old days and if you think they were perhaps you could support that view with actual evidence not just by saying 'woke' and 'resilience' a lot.

One of the ways you treat mental health problems is by acknowledging they exist or potentially exist in the first place. It's not just moaning it's the first step to action. The same really as buying pritt stiks and spirographs for a lockdown.

I've got two DC, brought up exactly the same with the same experiences, exposure and opportunities.
They can't have been. One is 4 years older than the other, so has 4 years worth of more experience, and your 'exactly the same experiences' happened to two children of completely different ages. The comparison is codswallop.

OP, try telling that to my friend who has a child with OCD who is today being assessed for the psychiatric ward (lockdown gravely affect this teen, she is literally knocking herself unconscious through banging her head against the wall or floor)

@copernicium I am so sorry to hear about your youngest

It’s very hard for teens who are already vulnerable

And that is a big problem,m

Lockdown affects those who already suffer worst

@ElliFAntspoo, why are you mocking people worried about their childrens unhappiness in one post and then fully admitting the issues of lockdown in the next