In-laws have declined the vaccine... AIBU?

[HotGlueGun]

So my in-laws (early 70s) have declined to have the vaccine. They are in our childcare bubble and so we see them regularly. They also ask us to do their shopping. WIBU to a) stop doing their shopping for them and b) reduce/ stop their contact with the kids? I'm really cross about but appreciate that they have free will and it's their choice. But resent having to do shopping for them... it's like they are happy for us to be at risk and aren't prepared to take reasonable steps to reduce their vulnerability and eliminate the risk for themselves/ the wider community.

I will. Thanks.

Yabu, in several ways.
1 - thinking you can dictate what they do re a vaccine that is new and a lot of people are wary about
2 - begrudging doing their shopping but happy to use them as a childcare bubble
3 - using them as a childcare bubble when you don't actually need childcare

@MarchingOnTogether That's the OP's DH's doing. The OP has said that she thinks it shouldn't stop but her DH has insisted on it.

Surely it’s up to them?

Pink, would it be discrimination if an employer interviewed 2 Carers for a job and gave the less qualified one the job over the more qualified, because the one who was more qualified hadn’t been vaccinated? This is for a job in a home of elderly Care home patients?

Would it be acceptable for a Care Home, in a few months time when the vaccine has been available to all, to say only relatives who have been vaccinated can visit in the Home?

What about a Special School which has a number of very vulnerable children with special needs...would it be okay for staff not to be vaccinated?

I'd like definitely stop doing their shopping without a doubt

They can do on live shopping anyway. Having this rug pulled away may make then Internet savvy and be a bonus for them?

WombatChocolate

Yes.

Oh dear, I've realised that I put the obvious of what I meant to say:

The OP has said that she thinks it should (not shouldn't) stop.

The In-Laws were being exposed to risk anyway via childcare for OP & her DH. Presumably it was all ok then (why?), yet we've had almost a whole year of Covid restrictions.

There'll have been times when the children were at school, in a classroom with loads of others, then at grandparents for evening and/or weekend, surely? So risk was brought to the home.

Is it a case of uh-oh, just had a thought about vaccine but, still want to use you for childcare. Have the vaccine and if you don't, no more shopping for you and you (suddenly) can't see your grandkids. No pressure or anything...

Covid Vigilantes are going to have a field day in months to come although I don't entirely believe they'll challenge people in real life. Only online.

We live in a Democracy. I doubt (unfortunately for the Vigilantes) you'll get your wish of 'vaccination mandatory or we'll make you a pariah'

Loads of people banging on in arrogant forceful fashion that everyone MUST have the vaccine or they're fucking stupid/idiots/insane isn't helping matters

DM was very undecided. We had a long productive chat about it on the phone this morning. She's now very likely to have the jab. There's no need to go in all guns blazing, authoritarian my way or the highway fashion.

Hi OP, suggest looking at BBC bitesize gcse biology, Edexcel section on “treating, curing and preventing disease”. First 5 pages explain immunisation and are what children are taught in class. Drugs and vaccines do not make it to market without achieving efficacy and safety. It may not change anything, but worth a try. In the end they may find that there will be some things they won’t be allowed to do in the future if not vaccinated. Some nurseries refused to have kids that hadn’t had the MMR vaccine back when people were scaremongering about it. It is possible that insurance companies could insist upon people having the COVID vaccine in the future.
Good luck with this.

@xenia good point, i personally am for choice as well.
Just you keep reading this sort of thing , which does seem strange as some people cannot have vaccinations even if they want to

If they have no access to TV/internet why don't you drop them round some factual information on the vaccine that could possibly change their minds? Don't force it on them just perhaps pop it in with their shopping. Give them the tools to make a better informed choice without the drama.
Just a thought

Everybody should be doing everything they can to keep everyone else safe.
My parents are driving 100 miles every weekend to see my brother. They refuse the vaccine. I wouldn't want them ignoring all the rules and bringing illness into my home. Particularly as a key worker. I think they are being selfish. Your children your decision. They can zoom call etc YANBU

Sadsiblingatsea

Surely it’s up to them?“

Sure, but they can’t expect others to dance around their foolish decision. They can do their own shopping for a start.

The Support Bubbles help those on their own with Children receive support and company. I am a single person in a bubble with my Parents. Have they said why they won't have the vaccine?. May be time for a chat and find out why and if there are genuine concerns about the Vaccine.

Perhaps the main point is that they would be unvaccinated. While freedom of choice is very important, what you base your decisions on is critical - I agree, get them to talk to their GP, which vaccine would they have, its only the Pfizer one that has to be stored uber low, encourage them to read rational information. For example, many over 80s have had a jab and most (including my parents) appear to be fine. Open those lines of communication - it's a scary world at the moment, maybe they are just over-anxious. As for shopping, I'd still do it, it's a decent thing to carry on doing, or maybe set up an account for them and get their groceries delivered to them. I live in Dorset, my Mam lives in Wales, I currently organise all of her shopping for her - they can transfer money to you or cash : )

i know its up to the individual whether they have the vaccine or not but i really can see no reason as to why you wouldnt have it, its just beyond me

The Financial Times in its weekend paper had a question yesterday about what is a couple have split up and the ex husband refuses the vaccine and the children live with the ex wife and see her elderly parents regularly - can contact be stopped with the father? It is certainly throwing up some interesting issues.

Do we know yet how long the vaccine continues to have effect? I think it might be a few months, rather than the long periods things like measles ones give you. Does anyone know?