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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Best CF stories part 2

657 replies

HepLaurenceLB · 30/01/2021 11:01

First thread
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3905995-Best-CF-Stories

OP posts:
Buttercup54321 · 31/01/2021 22:22

I had a friend whose boy was slightly older than mine. She kept saying she would keep various items of clothes for me (I didnt ask her). One day after Christmas she walked into school and handed me a bag of Christmas jumpers for the following year so I took them and thanked her. She then invited me for coffee the following week to collect the rest of the clothes she'd kept for me.
Arrived to find it all in a black bag.She said there was no need to go through it as Id seen her son wearing it. So all chain store which is absolutely fine by me.
When I got up to go I thanked her and asked if I could get her son anything in return. Mayne some jeans etc from the supermarket.
Friend replied no need at all. If I just gave her £40 plus £10 for the jumpers it would be fine!! I said I didnt have that much so she said we could settle up a bit at a time at school and she would make a payment card!!!
Very embarrassing and I just acceped it.
When I got home there were marks and a couple of holes in some of it. Should have given it back. Didnt and meekly paid.
It was a few years ago though.

OooErrThor · 31/01/2021 22:53

A work colleague tried this on me when I came back from maternity leave.

I was really struggling, looking back I think I had PND. Anyway I wasn't really taking the best care myself and wore the same clothes so she offered her old ones. I really didn't want that but said yes to be polite.

She rocked up with a car load of shite clothes, they were power suits from the 80s, shoulder pads etc and really not me and so dated they weren't even vintage. I took them out of politeness, then she said we'd agree of £5 per item or £100 for the lot.

Now, I'd like to think she was helping but she was clearly trying to palm of her old clothes on me and trying to make some cash in the process.

I actually said 'no, they're really not me so you can have them back' she was absolutely furious and said how lovely they were so I told that she should maybe wear them again then. Her reaction told me all I needed to know.

I left that company not long after so I never got to see her in them Grin

PuntasticUsername · 31/01/2021 22:55

This is nothing compared to some of these, but it pissed me right off.

We're renting a house while waiting for our house purchase to go through. Back when we were viewing, we must have mentioned to one lot of vendors (who did their own viewing - online estate agent) that we were renting in the area. This was a couple of months ago.

Last week, I had a call out of the blue from said estate agent. Vendors have now sold their house, and need to go into rented themselves. They really want to stay local, and we'd mentioned that our rental is only round the corner from them. They had asked their estate agent to give me their phone number, so that I can speak to them about our rented house, and basically discuss when we'll be leaving so that they can have it.

I said I'd rather they spoke to the letting agent, told them who that was and ended the call. Fuck off, I'm not doing the letting agent's job and we'll leave when we're good and bloody ready!

...oh and a few days later, we had a really confused call from our letting agent. Vendors HAD phoned there, and were apparently quite disconcerted to learn that they can't have our house yet.

Whammyyammy · 31/01/2021 22:58

@DuchessofHastings1

Has anyone got the link for mexican house thief thread? True searching but it's just threads which have mentioned it.
Cant post link, but here it is:

My next door but one neighbour is the ultimate in cheeky people.

in the 4 years that i have known him he regularly asks to borrow things, but he thinks that once permission have been given on one occasion that allows him to take the items whenever he pleases.
This includes him just going into my garage/shed/house and helping himself when he wants something, without asking.
I have asked him not to do this many, many times, but he still does it.

It all came to a head in October.

We own a house in Mexico, it is my favourite place in the world and isn't just a holiday house, to me it is my home. We have our clothes in the wardrobes, our food in the cupboards and family pictures on the walls.

We do however, occasionally allow close friends and family to stay in our house, because we are nice like that.
Two years ago SIL, her DH and their DCs went for a holiday there, they managed to get flights for a couple of hundred pounds and were really excited/proud of their amazing cheap holiday.
After they got back they came round for a barbecue, the neighbour 'popped over to say hi' ( which he always did just as we were sieving up the food) he was very impressed to hear about SILs super cheap amazing holiday and really enjoyed looking at her pictures.

The next morning the neighbour came round and told me that he was really impressed with SILs amazing holiday and had looked at the cost if flights to Mexico when he went home.
He told me that he had found some cheap flights and asked if he and his family could stay in our house.
I tried to be tactful and told him that we don't really like people staying there as its our home and not just a holiday house, and that we only let SIL go as it they don't have much money and if was their first holiday in 8 years.
The neighbour then spent the next couple of weeks begging me, telling me how they are broke and can't afford a holiday this year (they live in a five bed detached house and drive a merc and a BMW and he has a very good job, oh and they had already been abroad twice that year)
Finally I gave in and agreed. They went and had a lovely holiday.

Fast forward to last October.
My best friends mum (who I have known since I was 10 and who I call mum) went out for a holiday with her partner.
They had been there for a few days and came home one evening from a day out to find luggage in the hallway and some random people asleep in the beds.
BFM didn't wake them as she was afraid they were burglars as she snook out of the house and phoned me to ask if I knew what was going on and who they were. I obviously knew nothing so BFM called the local police.

The police arrived and woke up the random strangers and asked who they were and what they are doing in the house, they told the police that they are friends of the owners and had permission to be there. BFM told the police that they were lying as she had spoken to me, she was my family, and we had no idea who they were.
The random strangers and their children were escorted out if the house and taken to the local station. All the while ranting they they had permission to stay there and that it was BFM who they should be taking away.
I helped that one of the pictures on the wall is one of me my best friend and her mum, so it was obvious that they knew us.

The police called me and I confirmed what BFM had said, that she was they one with permission to be there and I had no idea who the random strangers were, and certainly hasn't given permission to anyone else as I only allowed family to stay in my home.

The policeman then told me who the people were.... It was the neighbour and his family!!
It turned out that he had made copies of my house keys and had visited my home for 6 holidays in the last two years!!!!

The best part was that after the police sorted it all out and let them go the neighbour and him family still expected to be able to stay in my house!
BFM had the locks changed and told the neighbour where to go.
But on the last day of her holiday they neighbour turned up to check if they were gone yet, because he wanted to move him family in as soon as she had left!

When the neighbour got home he came to bang on my door and rant about how I had ruined his holiday and how terrified his children were. How thanks to me they had be forced to stay in a horrible hotel and then he tried to present me with a bill for the hotel!
Basically he believed that because I forced him to stay in a hotel I should be responsible for the cost.

I was livid and told him that I gave him permission to stay in my house one time, not to use it as their own personal holiday home, and if anything I should be billing him for staying in my house.
He actually tried to act like he had done me a favour as he saw it that he had been 'looking after' my house while he was staying there.

We haven't spoken since, unless he wants to borrow something.

I now have someone that I pay to keep an eye on the place, just in case someone decided to take a free holiday again.

Cheeseandlobster · 31/01/2021 23:01

Not sure if I posted this on the previous thread but here goes.

I went to a hen night in a really popular seaside town which I used to live in and still had the local accent but now live hundreds of miles away. I got talking to a woman there who was also from out of town and she later added me on Facebook.

A year goes by with no contact then suddenly out of the blue she sends me a message.

"Hi Cheese. Not seen you in ages hun. Lets catch up. Why Dont I come and stay with you with the kids"

I realised she thought I lived in popular seaside town and fancied a free holiday so I messaged back

" Hi hun. Lovely to hear from you. Yes lets do that. I actually live in Grim Northern mining town now so much easier for you to travel to. Cant wait to see you!"

Needless to say she never replied and deleted me shortly after.

So Kelly. I was onto you immediately you cf. Next time try harder

DicklessWonder · 31/01/2021 23:35

I only had one bridesmaid/best woman. Managed to get the £160 dress we both liked for £40. As I had saved a fair bit I took her out and bought her the stroppy sandals she fell in love with, which cost more than the dress. She kept them to “break them in”.

Few weeks later she rings to confess that she had worn them on a night out and ruined them. I lived and worked away so ordered another pair to be sent to her.

Wedding was fine. Unbeknown to me she arranged for her (very) new boyfriend to pick her up straight after the meal and came back 2 hours later in jeans.

We went on honeymoon and she listed the dress and shoes (worn for literally 4 hours) on eBay. She covered what I spent on them more than 2 times over. She only confessed when I asked for the dress to dry clean it with mine. And never offered me the cost of the second pair of shoes, which I think is the least I deserved. We now live about a mile apart but haven’t seen each other for over 5 years. Sad

DicklessWonder · 31/01/2021 23:35

*strappy sandals

underneaththeash · 01/02/2021 00:15

Mine's on a previous thread a few years ago, but we had a drama group in for DS1's 6th birthday and limited numbers. We'd put invitees only and drop off that on the invite, but one of his friends had tried to drop 2 siblings too and we'd obviously declined.
But the parent didn't come back at pick up time......I called and called.....
the second time I called, I said that we were going into London to watch Matilda and they would have to come to the station to pick up their child. They missed the train.
We had no option, but to take the 6 year old into Marylebone Station. Luckily they did get the next train and met us.
The previous year the parent had picked up 40 minutes late as well.

Isitoveryetoristhisforever · 01/02/2021 00:39

I'm not sure if mine is CF or just really annoying... you decide.

When pregnant a close friend decided she wanted to throw me a baby shower. Each to their own but I don't really agree with them, think they are a bit grabby (we are in the UK if that makes any difference, I know they are more of the norm in america). I also hate being the centre of attention. Anyway... she keeps mentioning it and I keep saying no but eventually I agree to a small lunch with friends before baby arrives. I specifically ask her to tell people I don't want gifts and it is just a lunch our as who knows when my next one will be! Next thing I know she tells me she has booked everything for 2 weeks prior to my due date at a venue 40 minutes from my home. I don't drive so have to get the bus... a bit thoughtless but I try to remember she is doing something nice for me. Also worth mentioning my pregnancy was high risk so I was meant to be on bed rest from 36 weeks. I mention the travel to her and say I will ask dsis to get time off from work to bring me at least one way. She says not to be silly, if I can get myself there she will bring me back. Very kind of her.

I arrive on the day to find she has arranged a huge party (with a lot of people I don't really know and are more her friends than mine) and charged everyone a small fortune for food and a combined gift. I am not trying to be ungrateful but the food was not something I would have chosen at all, say for example Mexican when I cannot eat anything remotely spicy which she is aware of. So I don't really eat. She then orders multiple rounds of champagne for everyone, obviously I am not drinking. I start to worry she is drinking a lot when she said she would take me home. I mention this to her and she says we will share a taxi... she lives 10 minutes from the venue while I am 40 minutes. Anyway long story short, at the end of the party (which I did enjoy but spent a lot of the time feeling self conscious while she posed for photos with me... I was huge and despite my protests she insisted we took a lot) I book a taxi for myself. She is too tipsy to carry anything at this point so our friends help load us into the taxi with cake and gifts etc. She jumps out at her end and I continue on home...costs me a fortune and thank god my neighbour saw me pull up and helped me into the house with all the presents etc. She then rings me two days later to say she had a great time and would I mind bank transferring my share of the bill to her. I said i was confused and she tells me she over did it and is now a bit skint so I need to chip in.

I don't mean to be ungrateful and I hope I don't sound it but I can't help but feel the whole party was more for her than me. And ended up costing me a lot of money I just didn't have at the time. Maybe I'm just a cow....

HarrysWife · 01/02/2021 01:04

Think about this for a moment. What was your neighbour supposed to do - knock on each door to show them the card?

I would say "Oh no, that wasnt me, that was Elaine at number 12. Shes lovely like that. Im happy to pass the card on for you? I did like your mother very much". Then moonwalk my arse over to Elaine at number 12 and post the card.

ColdCottage · 01/02/2021 02:50

@Isitoveryetoristhisforever no, she was a cf and I'd have said, sorry no I can't pay. I understood it was a gift and don't have the funds. She sounds awful.

billybagpuss · 01/02/2021 08:29

Years ago my DD’s were changing schools and a ‘friend’ of my dads had a daughter there too. She offered us a blazer that her dd grew out of, so we duly went up and she brought it round to my dps, it fitted my eldest so she asked for £40 (they were £50 new) I declined as they weren’t compulsory and said I’d let her know. The following day we got the letter from the school with the uniform list they’d changed the uniform completely and it no longer included a blazer at all. There is no way she wouldn’t have known, she was absolutely the school busy body was one of the governors and probably helped them choose the new uniform.

She was the one who would complain if dd didn’t have the lead role in any show and would shout for everyone to come and watch when it was her kids turn at sports day. The whole village heaved a sigh of relief when she emigrated.

christmasathomeagain · 01/02/2021 08:50

@HepLaurenceLB

My DH’s grandfather decided to sell his very large house and move into an old people’s home. He told his grandchildren (8 of them) that they could choose an item of furniture each. They had two weeks to visit and choose what they wanted. My DH couldn’t get there until the second week. All that was left was a Peddal bin and a coffee table. Turns out that DH’s eldest brother and his wife had turned up on the first day with a removal truck and took everything. I don’t really care but it was so grabby.
After both grandparents passed my DF said they had taken what they wanted so all the grandkids could have what they wanted. By the time they got there all my cousins had claimed anything of value. I wasn't bothered, the only thing I wanted was an ornament, it hadn't been claimed so I took it. A cousin said 'you know thats not worth any money don't you?' It had great sentimental value as it was something I always remembered from my childhood. Nearly 20 years later I still have it (in the garage as my dh hates it, it us ugly to be fair) but I bet all the white goods and furniture by cousins took have long since gone.
Playnoh · 01/02/2021 11:21

@Lorddenning1

My sis has form for being a taker, but she been enabled by my parents etc. I had a pile of clothes, branded stuff to sell on eBay, one of the t shirts was around £75 band new, only worn once and I put it on for £5 and it had already got around 6 bids and was being watched by 20 people after it's first day, my sister bobbed round for something and noticed the big pile of clothes and asked what they were for, so I told her and she said oh can I have a look, her eldest 2 were coming up to wearing that size, so she went through them and tossed aside the next, burtons things and picked up all the designer ones, like Ted Baker, Ralph Lauren etc she said you don't mind do you, cancel the eBay ones and I will give you the fiver! Knowing full well I wouldn't take a fiver off family (unwritten rule in our family) so off she went with an arm full of clothes that her eldest two probably wouldn't even appreciate or look after!!! It also probably would of made more than that on EBay too! I was fuming, she won't get away with ever doing that to me again.
Why didn’t you say no?
DynamoKev · 01/02/2021 11:25

Second hand from Linkedin today.

Woman applies for job - doesn't get it.

Woman who did get the job contacts her via linkedin for advice on how to implement the stuff suggested in woman one's application.

CF employers took info from woman 1's application and gave it to someone else to implement - CF woman contacted woman 1 for help!!!!

sapnupuas · 01/02/2021 11:32

@Isitoveryetoristhisforever

I'm not sure if mine is CF or just really annoying... you decide.

When pregnant a close friend decided she wanted to throw me a baby shower. Each to their own but I don't really agree with them, think they are a bit grabby (we are in the UK if that makes any difference, I know they are more of the norm in america). I also hate being the centre of attention. Anyway... she keeps mentioning it and I keep saying no but eventually I agree to a small lunch with friends before baby arrives. I specifically ask her to tell people I don't want gifts and it is just a lunch our as who knows when my next one will be! Next thing I know she tells me she has booked everything for 2 weeks prior to my due date at a venue 40 minutes from my home. I don't drive so have to get the bus... a bit thoughtless but I try to remember she is doing something nice for me. Also worth mentioning my pregnancy was high risk so I was meant to be on bed rest from 36 weeks. I mention the travel to her and say I will ask dsis to get time off from work to bring me at least one way. She says not to be silly, if I can get myself there she will bring me back. Very kind of her.

I arrive on the day to find she has arranged a huge party (with a lot of people I don't really know and are more her friends than mine) and charged everyone a small fortune for food and a combined gift. I am not trying to be ungrateful but the food was not something I would have chosen at all, say for example Mexican when I cannot eat anything remotely spicy which she is aware of. So I don't really eat. She then orders multiple rounds of champagne for everyone, obviously I am not drinking. I start to worry she is drinking a lot when she said she would take me home. I mention this to her and she says we will share a taxi... she lives 10 minutes from the venue while I am 40 minutes. Anyway long story short, at the end of the party (which I did enjoy but spent a lot of the time feeling self conscious while she posed for photos with me... I was huge and despite my protests she insisted we took a lot) I book a taxi for myself. She is too tipsy to carry anything at this point so our friends help load us into the taxi with cake and gifts etc. She jumps out at her end and I continue on home...costs me a fortune and thank god my neighbour saw me pull up and helped me into the house with all the presents etc. She then rings me two days later to say she had a great time and would I mind bank transferring my share of the bill to her. I said i was confused and she tells me she over did it and is now a bit skint so I need to chip in.

I don't mean to be ungrateful and I hope I don't sound it but I can't help but feel the whole party was more for her than me. And ended up costing me a lot of money I just didn't have at the time. Maybe I'm just a cow....

I feel the same about baby showers but my friend insisted on throwing on for me, too.

Any suggestions I made were shut down, so it was obvious that she'd planned it all in her head of how she wanted it to and that's what was happening whether it was what I wanted or not.

The real issue was when she said I'd need to hire a hall for the party... I shot that down completely.

It ended up being at my house so at 38 weeks pregnant I was scrubbing my house clean, causing my SPD to get so bad I couldn't move for the duration of the party.

Good job I love her, eh?

twoshedsjackson · 01/02/2021 13:07

DynamoKev this reminds me of the time, many years ago, that my late DM went for the next grade up in her job, didn't get the promotion (married woman with DC was the reason , I suspect).
She miffed but accepted it, until they brought in a younger male to, in effect, become her boss - once she had "shown him the ropes".
Why on earth they seriously thought she would happily train a newbie to be her boss at a higher salary than hers, is beyond me. She was polite but vague when asked to provide in-house training.

FeelinFagin · 01/02/2021 14:36

About an hour ago I heard running water and went to my kitchen to investigate. Opened the back door and a builder from a house on the adjacent street had climbed over my garden fence and was happily filling his buckets up using my outdoor tap. Cheeky sod! Had they asked I would have said not a problem (and opened the gate) but his excuse was a, "um um um um, I was told we had permission to get water here"
No mate, permission from your boss or even the householder you're working for is not the permission you actually require!
I told him that it was okay but I was not happy that no one bothered to ask me at all!!

He then came back three times with more buckets!

BosleyCharliesAngel · 01/02/2021 14:53

@Isitoveryetoristhisforever - why on earth didn't you tell the party organiser that you're sorry she over spent but as you had said to her that you wanted a small party, with people you knew and food you could eat (i.e not spicy being pregnant and all that) along with the fact that you weren't drinking, you wouldn't be coughing up for her shindig and she would have to source the additional funds to tide her over somewhere else?

Yes, she was a CF but in fairness, you could have told her to do one! And laugh about it too!

BosleyCharliesAngel · 01/02/2021 14:56

@FeelinFagin - Shock Shock Shock
You just typed that the builder had to 'climb over' your garden fence to get access to your outside tap?
Do you pay water rates? If you do, tell them to go sling their hook.
They didn't ask permission and they could be hooking up a long hose to your outside tap and leave it running day and night.

FeelinFagin · 01/02/2021 15:17

@BosleyCharliesAngel thankfully no water meter. It's a set amount on our council tax bill here no matter how much you use. I do know the neighbour having the work done (essential outside repair work) and I don't think she's in to let them get water from her kitchen so I would have been happy to oblige but it was the cheek of the not asking. They took it upon themselves as she would never have told them to take from mine. Her house is higher than the rest so you can see we're the only one of 8 nearby houses with an outside tap.

TheresNothingIWantMore · 01/02/2021 16:16

@twoshedsjackson

DynamoKev this reminds me of the time, many years ago, that my late DM went for the next grade up in her job, didn't get the promotion (married woman with DC was the reason , I suspect). She miffed but accepted it, until they brought in a younger male to, in effect, become her boss - once she had "shown him the ropes". Why on earth they seriously thought she would happily train a newbie to be her boss at a higher salary than hers, is beyond me. She was polite but vague when asked to provide in-house training.
I had this too - I was a shop assistant and after about a year my supervisor quit. By that time I knew how to do his part of the job too (the main difference was ordering stock but also a few other bit and pieces). So I started doing it and asked my manager if I would get a pay rise. They said they weren't going to have a supervisor on that section any more and I stupidly kept doing the extra work for no extra money! Last straw was a few weeks later they hired a new guy and expected me to train him to be my supervisor. I handed in my notice and suddenly the offer of a pay rise was on the table!
stablefeet · 01/02/2021 16:21

I love these stories... but why do people just go along with the CF's? I had a "significant" birthday coming up and planned to go out with the other half. A fairly casual friend of mine from a shared hobby said that the the gang from the hobby group, some I was great friends with, would like to celebrate with me. I wasn't that bothered, said I wouldn't mind going for a nice meal. Had no problem with going out with my partner on another evening.
To cut a long and involved story short, I ended up finding myself agreeing to pick her up and drop her home from the meal, because I don't drink. She said it would be a surprise where we were going and when we arrived it was an Indian restaurant - the one cuisine I'd told her I don't like. The gang from the shared hobby - two of them I don't know very well and about 6 or 7 people I'd never met who were obviously her good mates. Did I sit down and pick over a korma? Nope. While she was squealing and jumping about hugging the strangers I turned to one of the people I did know a bit and said "I told her I don't eat Indian food. This isn't a birthday meal for me, but I hope you have a lovely time" and walked out. Down the road, into my car and kept going. Picked up a nice Chinese takeaway on the way home. Grin The really strange thing was that she didn't attempt to contact me and didn't mention it when I next saw her at the hobby. The other two did, they said they'd had no idea it was supposed to be a birthday celebration for me or they would have got me some flowers.

SnowWhitesRestingBitchFace · 01/02/2021 16:41

I love reading these but can never remember when I've been in a CF situation myself (which is fortunate I guess!) although...

SIL was stressed out in the summer as she was supposed to be working from home for two weeks due to lack of childcare but her boss needed her in the office and was offering to also pay for a holiday club. All sounds fine BUT she didn't get along with the organiser of the holiday club so didn't want to send DN there.

No problem I say, I'll have him! My DS is the same age and they love spending time together.

The two weeks were an utter nightmare. He was rude, compulsively lied constantly, hid rubbish all around my house and I kept catching him going through my cupboards (he wasn't being starved btw, just wanted unlimited bags of crisps).

And the end of the two weeks SIL thanks me and is absolutely delighted with herself because her boss has given her £200 for the inconvenience of having to go to the office and sort out childcare.

She didn't even offer me so much as a tenner. I would never ever have taken it but I just thought that it was incredibly rude not to even offer anything.

Puzzledandpissedoff · 01/02/2021 16:45

CF employers took info from woman 1's application and gave it to someone else to implement - CF woman contacted woman 1 for help!!!!

The new employee contacting "woman 1" might be unusual, but employers using her ideas certainly isn't

I've known too many who do a round of interviews involving tasks/scenarios, not because they actually need anyone but because it's cheaper than paying consultancy fees

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