Family fall out over a coffee table!

[PoppyBean]

I purchased a solid oak coffee table from my SIL about 4 years ago. She said she was getting rid, I said I loved it and asked how much she wanted for it, she wanted £30 so I paid and took my table.

I've just moved house and now have a toddler, my new lounge is an L shape and the coffee table doesn't really work anywhere in the room so I decided to sell it. I didn't really want to sell it as I still love it but it just doesn't fit. I done some research to see what's it's worth and what similar items are selling for and I sold it for £150.

SIL is fuming, says I've taken advantage and asked if i intend to share the profit. I said I paid the price you wanted you could of sold it yourself. I hadn't bought it to sell for profit and I'd be keeping it if it fit in my room but it doesn't.

Now my brother has text saying I've really upset her and she's shocked and disappointed at my greed.

SIL gifted me some baby items when my child was born. As they were gifted I asked what she wanted to do with them when I'd finished with them, she asked for some things back and said she wasn't bothered about the rest. I gave them away.

I think there's a huge difference between something you've been given as a gift, even if second hand and something you paid for so I don't feel like I have done anything wrong here.

Who is being unreasonable? Should I share the profit?

@BonnieDundee

You bought it from her for £30, fair and square. If you’d bought it from a stranger on eBay then sold it for a profit, would you be expected to share then too?

Making a profit off something a stranger sold young is a completely different thing. I'd split the profit with her

Do explain how it is different.

[quote PoppyBean]@HikeForward so if she wouldn't pay full Price for her nails but will happily take them free from me every 2 weeks is that ok? Is that not way more cheeky than genuinely selling a piece of furniture that no longer suits and making a small profit?[/quote]
It doesn’t matter now op. It’s over and done with

As usual people on here love a bit of drama. They aren’t trying to help you they are just laughing their tits off snd loving all the petty squabbling and how you’ve just escalated it

As said it’s irrelevant. You won’t be doing her hair and nails again so you don’t need to feel thr resentment, she won’t be selling you anything discounted again, and it’s unlikely their will be friendly family relations any time soon

All over sixty quid. It’s so pathetic.

And the email you sent your Brother is perfect re the nails and hair.

Make sure you never do it for free from now on just say you don't have the time etc

Great text op, this is why this kind of grabby behaviour backfires (your SIL being grabby)

She never felt guilty for getting free stuff before now has she?

It is a shame to fall out over something so 'trivial' but it shows a deeper disrespect imo

Fantastic OP, that is one of the best responses I have ever read. Well done on not being blackmailed by the 'it's for the children' comment 👏

Forget the semantics. It comes down to the fact that OP has been a generous sil for many years and that is not being acknowledged or reciprocated. Worse than that, she’s actively being bullied into servility.

Hell the fuck no.

Perfect response OP. She's bang out of order to even charge you for a table she wanted rid of while using your services for free. Happy to take but unwilling to give.

Dont give her mates rates on hair and nails, she's proven she wouldn't do the same.

I think your text was really good. Might make them think a bit.. So what if it was only over £60. Although it wasn’t- it was over her happy to take multiple freebies off you but winged when you made a little money from something you’d given her. Without the freebie nails and hair info I’d have said give her half the profit, but in reality you’ve given her enough.

And I don’t comment on posts just for a laugh at someone else’s expense.

Bonus is the slots your SIL took up for her free treatments will be now available to paying customers .

Rubbish @Bluntness100. The OP could have smoothed things over by giving the SiL £60 and carrying on as normal but it is folk on here that give people the confidence to not give in to CF. And SiL is a CF!

It 'only' £60 but it is the SiL that has caused the hassle and she is pathetic. The OP is just standing up for herself and well done to her for doing so.

Why are people saying the SIL gave her the table at a discounted rate?

Sounds like she’s couldn't be bothered with the hassle of selling it herself and sold it to OP for what she thought it was worth.

I’m not laughing at OP’s posts either.

I would have given her half the profit but the freebies she has had for years puts a very different spin on things. The comment about it being the kids money is totally low. I wonder what your brother has made of your very reasonable response about your children’s interests from your work?

this reminds me of harry met sally when someone said to someone else "i will never want that wagon wheel coffee table"

i am no help.

Dead right op. She has cut her nose off to spite her face.. why should you be the mug to keep the peace.

A great reply op!

@Bluntness100
It isn't about £60. It's about constantly putting myself out for others to not get it in return. To always being the one who thinks I'll bite my tongue because it's family but family doesn't seem to mean anything in return. I shouldn't always be the one to give and keep quiet and take their grabbing and confrontation. If it was just £60 it was for her to say so.. not me.

[quote PoppyBean]@Bluntness100
It isn't about £60. It's about constantly putting myself out for others to not get it in return. To always being the one who thinks I'll bite my tongue because it's family but family doesn't seem to mean anything in return. I shouldn't always be the one to give and keep quiet and take their grabbing and confrontation. If it was just £60 it was for her to say so.. not me.[/quote]
Great response to him OP.
I really do hope you don’t do free things for people like these anymore.

I'd just bung her the £60

@00100001

I'd just bung her the £60

Did you miss the bit about the OP giving the SIL about ten grand's worth of free hairdressing and nails?

The SIL was petty to ask for any money for the table in the first place against that background.

I’m not even saying I wouldn’t give her the £60...I’d watch the grasping cow pocket it and know her exactly for what she is. Worth every poxy penny.

Civil and polite now. No more hair.

4 years!!!
FFS, she's nuts.

Excellent response from you. Well done.

At first I thought that you wete wrong, but given the update she's a cf.
It's important to not get into the habit of giving freebees. I've got beauticians in the family and they go on a mates rates policy. Likewise decorators/mechanics etc.

It's going to be awkward from now on, so it would be best to profit share and set a price for services in the future.

I can see both sides, I would have split the money personally.

The petty cow in me is really interested in how she'll react to being told you'll no longer offer to do her hair and nails FOC.

Well obviously the hair and nails changes it, your response is perfect, might have added that your were upset to be charged at all for the coffee table given the hair and nails.