If you’re not in work, how much money do you get for spends from your partner?

[ShutUpAlex]

If they’ve already covered all the bills etc, how much would you expect to get for personal, walking around money into your own account?

@ShutUpAlex

Ok say take home is 3 grand. Bills come to about 1300. So that’s 1700. 500 into savings and 200 into kids savings accounts.

Based on this, £300 ish

@ShutUpAlex

bills are separate why would the person at home need more for personal spending money?

So they can buy themselves things?

But surely the person in work wants to buy themselves things too?

I was a SAHM for 12ish years and all money was shared. I know more about our incomings and outgoings than DH does.

@MaskingForIt

I wouldn’t expect anything from someone who was just a partner. I’d get a job and pay my own way.

I assume OP is a SAHM, looking after children while her partner works.

I have access to as much money as I want. No questions asked.

As a SAHM I expect the same amount of monthly ‘pocket money’ as my husband. We have always called our personal spending money pocket money even when I was working.

We currently get £200 each per month.

To clarify the ‘pocket money’ is just for me. All bills, family treats and anything for the house or kids I take out of the joint account.

Joint account and can spend what I like.

your partner just started a tread on this I think

@Thatwentbadly

To clarify the ‘pocket money’ is just for me. All bills, family treats and anything for the house or kids I take out of the joint account.

But who pays into the joint accoubt

Whatever he wants really. We have a joint credit card and I pay it in full each month. I can see this wouldn’t work if either of you were likely to spend more than you had spare. Neither of us are big spenders so it doesn’t ever become a problem

I don’t consider it spends from my partner, as if he’s generously giving me some of his hard earned money. I consider it equal spending money for personal use. I would expect to have the same amount as him after things are paid and saved for etc.

@RJnomore1

I should imagine £500 would be plenty.

Your bills are very very low!

Is 1300 low for bills?

Ours are £1400. I thought that was about average.

I didn’t get an allowance/pocket money. He let me have access to his PayPal account for online purchases and I got to take his card to pay for my toiletries. I think he sensed I felt uneasy asking him for money so he began to anticipate my needs and get me things I wanted/needed as a gift so I wasn’t going without.

£500 free spending money each month is loads.

What on earth are you spending it all on?

Is 1300 low for bills?

Depends where you live. Most people I know pay that on mortgage/rent. Our bills altogether are £3500.

The budget for entertaining the kids should be separate from personal spending money.

All household bills paid out of joint account. All family expenditure put on a credit card which is paid off each month - that's all groceries, phone bill for both us, clothes for the kids, activities/hobbies for the kids, meals out, holidays, travel expenses and petrol, days out, large one off purchases ski wear or a new phone for example etc. A proportion of what's left allocated to savings. What's left then split 50/50 - generally used for clothes for ourselves, haircuts, meals out solo with friends, nights out, magazines/books, individual hobbies, general fripperies etc.

This seems to work well for us and feels fair.

New rents for smaller 3 beds in my area are c£900pcm. Council tax will be around £100pcm. Gas and electric say £70, water around £40. That's over £1100 before you've even thought about insurance, groceries, essential travel, TV/ internet costs, phone, routine replacement of clothes and shoes. The problem is the rent cost though. If private rents were equivalent to average social rents locally (which are, for me, realistic and sensible rents), no way would essential spending for a family of 3 reach £1300. Housing costs are a nightmare :(

All income into joint account. DH works, I am self employed on a very part time basis. We each get £100 into our personal accounts each month, this covers clothes, birthday presents to each other and anything we want for hobbies or just for ourselves. Money in joint account used for everything else, bills, outings and holidays, spending on house, groceries and toiletries... what's left at end of month goes into various savings accounts

We just pay bills and what's left is left.
I'm not working and have equal access to all money, there's no his and hers here as we are married and equal partners.
I manage the finances though and dh works.

i’d say if you're not working, then nothing. I assume you get benefits for your bipolar disorder and keep all this yourself?

Dh pays me a monthly “wage” which I buy food out of but there’s plenty left over for me and dc’s. if I wanted a big item like a sofa or something we would discuss it first and then he’d transfer the money to me.

I do sometimes wish we had a joint account but I’m similar to you OP in that I have phases where I buy a lot of unnecessary stuff so it’s probably not a good idea. Also we own property and some of them are in my name so I don’t feel he’s trying to fiddle me!

Nothing from a bf/gf and Id not expect them to shoulder all the bills themselves.

From a spouse it would depend on why not working but £500 is far too much for general free spending and I wouldn’t be happy with that. I’d rather it went towards the children’s savings for house deposits etc.