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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Child in the supermarket?

512 replies

Whipituntilitpeaks · 22/01/2021 08:51

Just curious, do you take your child/children with you when you go food shopping?
I’m currently a Sahm to my toddler Dd and always used go go early on a Monday morning, when barely anyone was there.
During the first lockdown, we stopped going and Dp would go on a Saturday morning.
Dp works Mon-Fri and often was there for hours queuing up etc, but back then he was the only one of us that went out (aside from walks in our field)
When it calmed down a little, I went back to doing it with my Dd, do you take yours?
For us, it helps dp as he obviously doesn’t mind at all, but after a long week at work, it’s not fun to do the big shop. It’s also some kind of normality in mine and DD’s life, but I’ve started to feel a bit worried about it. We’re not in the U.K. but cases are around the same number one more or less and some of my friends don’t take theirs into any shops
Aibu to still take her shopping or should dp or myself go alone on the weekend?

OP posts:
theantsgomarchin · 22/01/2021 14:48

@rhowton

Omg just take your child!! The people on here are completely crazy!!! This country is losing the plot.

This

X10000000009

TempsPerdu · 22/01/2021 14:50

This country is losing the plot
I think that happened about last April tbh Grin

HexWitch · 22/01/2021 14:56

@rhowton

Omg just take your child!! The people on here are completely crazy!!! This country is losing the plot.
100% this. I've been so glad that I couldn't get a delivery slot way back last March. I was glad that I would have to take my DC into supermarkets and show them at least a little normalcy. Teach them how to manage social distancing, hand sanitising etc. It's done them the world of good and made them far less frightened than they would've been constantly inside the home thinking they plague was lurking around every corner waiting to mug them if they so much as set foot in Lidl.
Denny53 · 22/01/2021 14:57

My children are grown up with children of their own. I used to relished the chance to go shopping on my own Oh the peace, without the constant mum mum mum, can we have this, can we have that, when we going home.
I get a delivery Tesco & HelloFresh and rarely go food shopping to an actual supermarket and these days I think it’s very sensible to be going shopping on your own, wherever possible

brogueish · 22/01/2021 14:59

Yes. I take my 2 year old in the buggy. The few responses I get are roughly equal between disgust and delight. Lots of grandparents desperately missing seeing children I think.

OP, ignore the negativity, your logic is sound. Take your child during the week.

AmoElCafe · 22/01/2021 14:59

If I have time to myself (I don’t, at the moment) the last thing I’d want to do with it is food shopping.

TheOtherMaryBerry · 22/01/2021 14:59

But I refuse to have DD treated like persona non grata when we do need to venture in. She is a person and has as much right to be out in public as anyone else.

Yep. This absolutely. I've been taking DS to the shops as and when I've needed to. Not tonnes but he loves it, gets lots from it. I've not had a single issue, in fact it's been as normal with staff waving and smiling and chatting to him, all distanced of course. I'm not having him be completely unsocialised by this.

formerbabe · 22/01/2021 15:00

My children are grown up with children of their own. I used to relished the chance to go shopping on my own Oh the peace, without the constant mum mum mum

Yes well your DC weren't banned from school, banned from their extra curricular activities and banned from playing with other children.

I don't take my dd shopping for my own benefit

PurpleWh1teGreen · 22/01/2021 15:04

Temps I should have been clearer. I meant people actively choosing Tesco Metro / Sainsbury's local over larger shops.

I've actually found our local bakers & butchers have been excellent at enforcing a reduced numbers. Meanwhile The local co-op is every man or woman for them self. Smile

Notadramallama · 22/01/2021 15:11

If your supermarket is a 24 hour one leave your child at home and go early before your DH goes to work. I'm in and out of the supermarket by 7.30am - there's hardly anyone else there

Fufumuji · 22/01/2021 15:12

*Not wanting them or extra adults in supermarkets as it means more risk to staff and others is looking at the big picture rather than personal wants

No it isn't. OP plus toddler going when its very quiet is safer for staff and others than OP going alone when its very busy.
OP's child does not add any risk for anyone, if they are being responsible and staying 2 metres away from her and wering masks.

Have some sense people.

Whatsmyusername30 · 22/01/2021 15:14

There were quite a few children in the supermarket when j went today. No one bat an eyelid. I’m not taking mine currently as the area is increasing in cases quite rapidly plus I don’t really have to take them. But if you feel comfortable doing so no one is going to take any notice and if they do their assholes.

I worried less about the children in the supermarket today than the woman who had her mask hanging off her face eating the whole way round.

Whatsmyusername30 · 22/01/2021 15:14

Plus there was lots of adults shopping together too!

Freetigerking · 22/01/2021 15:23

I don’t know about anyone else but I go to the supermarkets to get away from the kids for an hour. Even when the kids were tiny, I let my parents watch them, if my partner was working away. I also find it annoying if there is two adults plus 3/4 children running about.

Freetigerking · 22/01/2021 15:26

Whatsmyusername30

Plus there was lots of adults shopping together too!

My sister was at Tesco last week and there was a big argument at the tills because the amount of couples in the supermarkets. Some guy must have flipped. Mind you I can see his point as there was a large queue to get in.

formerbabe · 22/01/2021 15:27

@Freetigerking

I don’t know about anyone else but I go to the supermarkets to get away from the kids for an hour. Even when the kids were tiny, I let my parents watch them, if my partner was working away. I also find it annoying if there is two adults plus 3/4 children running about.
Good for you for having free childcare on tap
TempsPerdu · 22/01/2021 15:41

@PurpleWh1teGreen Ah thanks for clarifying and sorry for my slightly terse response - that makes more sense now.

Just thought you were advocating choosing supermarket chains over local small businesses!

AmoElCafe · 22/01/2021 15:48

@Freetigerking

I don’t know about anyone else but I go to the supermarkets to get away from the kids for an hour. Even when the kids were tiny, I let my parents watch them, if my partner was working away. I also find it annoying if there is two adults plus 3/4 children running about.
Fab. I don’t have childcare. On the very very rare chance I do, I don’t want to waste it on going to the supermarket.
OnlyFoolsnMothers · 22/01/2021 15:50

@Lweji

It actually is sad. I wish the highlight was his swimming lessons, his judo class, his football training, his music class, play-school, soft play, etc. etc. but guess what? All closed.

I know it's not the same, and without the other children around, but can you or do you do some of that at home? It could be at the same times he used to go, but with you.

This will not be forever, but we need to get through it as safely as possible. And at the moment, many communities are severely affected and a high risk.

Why didn’t I think to build a soft play centre and a swimming pool in my three bed terraced house....
TopBitchoftheWitches · 22/01/2021 15:57

Yet people wonder why numbers are still so high.

Your children are not immune to spreading this and you are allowing it.

Fufumuji · 22/01/2021 15:58

Yet people wonder why numbers are still so high

I don't wonder. I know for a fact its not because of a 2 year old sitting in a trolley not touching anything or interacting with anyone.

Same4Walls · 22/01/2021 16:00

Yet people wonder why numbers are still so high.

The numbers are so high becaue we are still seeing the fallout from Christmas mixing.

It's categorically not because a 2 year old is accompanying her mother to the supermarket when it's quiet. Confused

AmoElCafe · 22/01/2021 16:16

@TopBitchoftheWitches

Yet people wonder why numbers are still so high.

Your children are not immune to spreading this and you are allowing it.

No I don’t. Numbers are still high because it is running rampant through care homes again. Because 1/3 of cases are still being caught in hospitals. Because people are still going out to work, often in non ‘Covid secure’ environments. Because people are still holding weddings for 400 people (!). Because Christmas was a free for all. Because borders were closed too late. But yeah, if the government can make people think it’s because of a 2 year old sitting in a trolly it takes a lot of pressure off them, doesn’t it? Plus creates an environment of fear. Win win.
Oysterbabe · 22/01/2021 16:18

I take mine if DH isn't around to have them.

Same4Walls · 22/01/2021 16:21

But yeah, if the government can make people think it’s because of a 2 year old sitting in a trolly it takes a lot of pressure off them, doesn’t it? Plus creates an environment of fear.

It actually really worries me that many people genuinely still spout the belief that it's small situations like this that are the reason why numbers are still so high. Add to this going for a socially distanced walk with a friend, taking a child out for more than 1 walk or driving a little further afield to go and exercise somewhere less crowded etc.

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