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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Child in the supermarket?

512 replies

Whipituntilitpeaks · 22/01/2021 08:51

Just curious, do you take your child/children with you when you go food shopping?
I’m currently a Sahm to my toddler Dd and always used go go early on a Monday morning, when barely anyone was there.
During the first lockdown, we stopped going and Dp would go on a Saturday morning.
Dp works Mon-Fri and often was there for hours queuing up etc, but back then he was the only one of us that went out (aside from walks in our field)
When it calmed down a little, I went back to doing it with my Dd, do you take yours?
For us, it helps dp as he obviously doesn’t mind at all, but after a long week at work, it’s not fun to do the big shop. It’s also some kind of normality in mine and DD’s life, but I’ve started to feel a bit worried about it. We’re not in the U.K. but cases are around the same number one more or less and some of my friends don’t take theirs into any shops
Aibu to still take her shopping or should dp or myself go alone on the weekend?

OP posts:
Cornetttttto · 22/01/2021 13:35

Food shopping is the highlight of my two year old toddler's week. I take him with me, not sure how on earth people are losing all sense of proportion.

aquamarine1 · 22/01/2021 13:36

I take mine to the shops and will continue to do so.

SomersetHamlyn · 22/01/2021 13:37

@Whipituntilitpeaks My heart breaks when I see her run up to children if we go for a walk 😢she’s definitely craving that.

Your heart may break but I really doubt that the parents of those children are delighted that your toddler is 'running up to them' because she 'craves interaction'.

IceCreamAndCandyfloss · 22/01/2021 13:37

@11MrsLuther

I get deliveries if I can for main shop but yes I would take a child if needes. I took my 9 year old today as I am off and we needed shopping. I suppose I could have made him wait outside but I don't 100% trust him to wait sensibly, and its a car park, and I can't see the risk is any higher than him being in school, which he is 3 days a week The supermarket was dead anyway.
It’s not the risk to him alone though is it, it’s the risk to others especially if he is mixing at school still.
Same4Walls · 22/01/2021 13:38

People on here, including the OP, are making excuses to trot their child out against guidance.

She doesn't need to make up an excuse shes using her common sense to shop when it is quieter so she avoids coming into contact with more people thus reducing the likelihood of catching the virus. Blindly following the rules is fine but applying common sense every now and then is probably a better idea.

AmoElCafe · 22/01/2021 13:38

Your heart may break but I really doubt that the parents of those children are delighted that your toddler is 'running up to them' because she 'craves interaction'

Some wouldn’t be, sure. If a toddler ran up to us looking for interaction I and my children would be more than happy to chat to said toddler.

Paquerette · 22/01/2021 13:39

[quote Ellieboolou33]@Paquerette oh give over, the risk is minimal, I will continue to take them for their weekly treat Smile[/quote]
🤦‍♀️ if the risks from shopping are so minimal, why have all of the non essential shops had to close?

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 22/01/2021 13:40

People on here, including the OP, are making excuses to trot their child out against guidance I don’t need an excuse, I want to take my child with me and I will continue to!

SomersetHamlyn · 22/01/2021 13:41

@AmoElCafe Some wouldn’t be, sure. If a toddler ran up to us looking for interaction I and my children would be more than happy to chat to said toddler.

And I'm not, when it happens. My kids are older and are really good at social distancing by now and are suffering hugely from their isolation from their friends.

So I'm really, really unimpressed on those occasions when a toddler has run up to them and pawed them while parents gaze on adoringly.

I wonder how OP knows in advance whether or not the parents in question are 'more than happy' to have their kids put at risk.

formerbabe · 22/01/2021 13:41

Mainly older men who are most affected by covid...the sorts of people who object to lowering their speed when driving past schools in order to protect children from being run over. Who think driving slower is an affront to their civil liberties. Yet, here we are being told our children shouldn't leave the house to protect people who wouldn't even stick their foot on the brake pedal...purlease.

pinkcortina · 22/01/2021 13:42

I take mine. I'm a single parent. But this tends to be the smash and grab top up shop and I try and get my mum (childcare bubble) to have them while I do the 'big shop' in Aldi.
I do try and go after work as well but often I'm exhausted and it's very late then and I leave having spent ££££ but still have nothing for tea!

Whodofthunk · 22/01/2021 13:43

@Same4Walls

People on here, including the OP, are making excuses to trot their child out against guidance.

She doesn't need to make up an excuse shes using her common sense to shop when it is quieter so she avoids coming into contact with more people thus reducing the likelihood of catching the virus. Blindly following the rules is fine but applying common sense every now and then is probably a better idea.

As in checking when it is busy and going alone. OP has already says she goes there just to take her child out. Why even ask if YABU when it is clear as day you are.
2021ishere2021 · 22/01/2021 13:44

@Ladywinesalot

Why shouldn't a 5 year old wear a mask? I wouldn't expect him to be perfect but he can try.

Some people have to do CPR a in full PPE, I don't see the big deal with expecting people to wear a face mask in public. Children have to taken on a case by case basis depending on the developmental stage, but I really don't see the issue with them trying to be the best that is reasonable

Lweji · 22/01/2021 13:44

Yet, here we are being told our children shouldn't leave the house to protect people who wouldn't even stick their foot on the brake pedal...purlease.

Who said that chidren shouldn't leave the house?

alltheadrenalin · 22/01/2021 13:44

If I have to, hate shopping with kids at best of times.

Whodofthunk · 22/01/2021 13:45

@formerbabe

Mainly older men who are most affected by covid...the sorts of people who object to lowering their speed when driving past schools in order to protect children from being run over. Who think driving slower is an affront to their civil liberties. Yet, here we are being told our children shouldn't leave the house to protect people who wouldn't even stick their foot on the brake pedal...purlease.
Well I personally know a few women who have died from covid, but whatever Hmm
DreamingInColours · 22/01/2021 13:45

If I didn't bring 1yo DS food shopping with me he would basically never go anywhere (except walks to the park). He needs to socialise and get exposed to places like supermarkets. His whole bloody life has been in lockdown so I'm going to give him any bit of normality I can. He is always with me so presumably if one of us contracted the virus, the other would anyway.

donewithitalltodayandxmas · 22/01/2021 13:46

People are still looking at the risks to them not the risk they may pose to others.
Also not just 90 year old granny's who are dying , lots at risk people have to work , my mum is 63 can't retire and will be at higher risk due to age , but people can't see that.
Yes use judgement and others have no choice but to those saying I will do it because I want to and I don' care , well I give up and when kids are still off school for longer and measure remain in place for longer as numbers are not coming down quick enough , then we all suffer longer.
I don't think many are enjoying this and we all want to get some normality back .

Lweji · 22/01/2021 13:47

@Cornetttttto

Food shopping is the highlight of my two year old toddler's week. I take him with me, not sure how on earth people are losing all sense of proportion.
Don't you think it is sad if food shopping is the highlight of your toddler's week? Speaking of sense of proportion...
Whodofthunk · 22/01/2021 13:47

@DreamingInColours

If I didn't bring 1yo DS food shopping with me he would basically never go anywhere (except walks to the park). He needs to socialise and get exposed to places like supermarkets. His whole bloody life has been in lockdown so I'm going to give him any bit of normality I can. He is always with me so presumably if one of us contracted the virus, the other would anyway.
That could be said for so many children, but yes, you have the special one.
hollyangel · 22/01/2021 13:48

It's actually really upsetting reading some of these replies. I honestly feel like I've woken up in a horror movie some days.

If children and young healthy adults were dying in their millions, of course I would stay at home for as long as necessary. But that's not the case.

The median age of death is still in the 80's. People have lost all perspective.

Lweji · 22/01/2021 13:49

He needs to socialise and get exposed to places like supermarkets. His whole bloody life has been in lockdown so I'm going to give him any bit of normality I can.

1 year olds don't need that much socialising with outsiders to the family. And how do you socialise in the supermarket, other than a brief chat to the cashier? Surely you can still see people walking about outside.

Same4Walls · 22/01/2021 13:50

Don't you think it is sad if food shopping is the highlight of your toddler's week?

Why would it be sad? 2 year olds get excited going out to different places and at the moment the only place they are allowed to go is to the park or to the shop. I can totally see how at the moment a trip to the shops is very exciting for a 2 year old.

FortniteBoysMum · 22/01/2021 13:50

My 10 year old hasn't set foot in a shop other than when his dad is at work and I really need something that I can't get in our local co-op. If I'm going in there he waits in the car. His been in a shop twice since March. He is anemic so I worry he picks up viruses so easily. If it's avoidable don't do it the less risk the better. More people in shops means more to spread the virus making it go on even longer.

Lweji · 22/01/2021 13:52

The median age of death is still in the 80's. People have lost all perspective.

Do you understand what a median is?
That means 50% of those who die are above 80. And 50% are below.

Have you seen what can happen to children who get covid-19? Are you willing to risk your child?

"Most children with COVID-19 have mild symptoms or have no symptoms at all. However, some children can get severely ill from COVID-19. They might require hospitalization, intensive care, or a ventilator to help them breathe. In rare cases, they might die.

CDC and partners are investigating a rare but serious medical condition associated with COVID-19 in children called Multisystem Inflammatory Syndrome in Children (MIS-C). We do not yet know what causes MIS-C and who is at increased risk for developing it. Learn more about MIS-C.

Babies under 1 year old and children with certain underlying conditions may be more likely to have severe illness from COVID-19.
Babies under 1 year old might be more likely to have severe illness from COVID-19."

www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/daily-life-coping/children/symptoms.html

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