Home-schooling pushed ex-Marine to "breaking point"

[Ori2021]

Has anyone else read this story on BBC news? Parents are victims of this pandemic too. The toll on parent's mental health is really bad; this article just highlights it. I don't know what could be done to support people like this man, and parents in general like me, but I find it amazing that parents have just been told "get on with it," and quite literally, flung under the bus. It's damaging people's relationships with their own children.

Good on this man for telling the truth about his experience. It is AWFUL trying to home-school, and work at the same time. Some people are managing well, and hopefully there is light at the end of the tunnel but I do think the Govt. need to think of a way to recognise the daily struggle that parents and families and their children are facing.

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-devon-55723022

no live lessons here just reams of long complicated instructions involving word banks, narrative poems, story boards, story mountains, cutting out pictures, printing PowerPoints ...I have caused the poor ta to ring me to explain it to me. I just can't see how they expect me as a randomer non teacher to understand a teaching technique which takes years to learn. and still wfh. I feel for us all....

@Guineapig99

'"Yoohoo, Mr Quadruple Amputee? We've got some mums over here who think you're making a big fuss about nothing. What's that? No, they're fine, no war trauma and they've mostly got all their limbs. They're just pretty sure they know better."

Oh give over, that's not what it's about. If it was story about his service/ sacrifice/recover etc. no-one would be disagreeing with him but saying homeschooling is once of the most traumatic things you've done, in a national paper is just asking for trouble... and that's from someone who is loathing ever minute of it.

My point (which I agree was inelegantly expressed ) was that there were people on here who seemed to be deciding how he was allowed to feel about having two legs and an arm blown off.

The thing is, probably most of us have been through some horrible stuff in our lives. I know I have, and I've still felt pushed to breaking point at times by homeschooling. I wouldn't be at all happy if someone on here started minimising and deriding the impact those things had on me.

For him, there could well be all kind of factors in play. PTSD, struggling with his physical disability, feeling added pressure due to being away from his kids in the past, or added pressure because he feels he needs to compensate for his disability. maybe feeling like he should be able to cope better because of everything else he's been through, so he bottles it up initially. Maybe other things as well - we don't know, because we're not him.

The point is, if he or anyone else says that they're struggling, it would be nice to muster a bit of empathy and accept that they're allowed to feel whatever they're feeling.

@Positivevibesonlyplease

Schools have upped their game because parents felt schools weren’t doing enough. We are told to do live lessons, so that’s what we are doing. Now parents are complaining about that too. It’s an awful situation for everyone and I think we just have to be honest and empathic. Everyone appears to be doing their best.

I'm absolutely not complaining about the teachers! My children's teachers have been brilliant.

Please let us know the acceptable way we can say “this is incredibly hard and stressful” without being accused of pushing an agenda?

Its not parents or you, It is the selective reporting of the BBC that I disagree with. Why not report positive experiences of children at home.and the fact they are safe at home? Of the reality of schools before lockdown. Or even the positive experiences of lockdown [ Its called making the best of a bad situation. But no, again the BBC choose this - Yet again.
It absolutely is an agenda. Some people are quite frankly to blind to see it.
So I don't underestimate the difficulty of lockdown and home learning. I am working and have three of my own. Its just here we go again.

I'm absolutely not complaining about the teachers! My children's teachers have been brilliant. That’s so lovely to hear.

God no, not complaining about the teachers - they’ve been fab, or the schools. I agree with closures.

But yes, we need to be able to say something is hard without being shut down.

My question is why is working for a veterans charity ciutbed as being a critical worker and able to send his children to school?

That's imo bollocks as they're not currently serving, so no more valuable to society than any other charity!

It's all of this crap about who sends children etc, who's a key worker etc that's pissed me off the most.

Homeschooling and working is hard. But it's a pandemic.

Atm everyone wants to be awarded for managing. But everyone has to manage. There are no awards. We're all trying to walk through treacle!

People don't want awards generally they just want to be able to find things hard without being jumped on.

Positivevibesonlyplease

So have ours ! I literally nearly cried at how decent a couple of teachers have been

@Thisisworsethananticpated I just love hearing positive messages about schools. It’s so lovely to hear amongst all the negativity and stress everyone is going through. Hope all is OK with your family

My question is why is working for a veterans charity ciutbed as being a critical worker and able to send his children to school?

www.gov.uk/government/publications/coronavirus-covid-19-maintaining-educational-provision/guidance-for-schools-colleges-and-local-authorities-on-maintaining-educational-provision

Key public services
This includes:

those essential to the running of the justice system
religious staff
charities and workers delivering key frontline services
those responsible for the management of the deceased
journalists and broadcasters who are providing public service broadcasting

@MotherExtraordinaire

My question is why is working for a veterans charity ciutbed as being a critical worker and able to send his children to school?

That's imo bollocks as they're not currently serving, so no more valuable to society than any other charity!

It's all of this crap about who sends children etc, who's a key worker etc that's pissed me off the most.

Homeschooling and working is hard. But it's a pandemic.

Atm everyone wants to be awarded for managing. But everyone has to manage. There are no awards. We're all trying to walk through treacle!

Having worked for a veterans charity this leaves me speechless. You do know they still need help, some have lost limbs, gone blind, have mental health issues, workers go to their homes we chase up hospital care, appointments. We support their wives. They were maimed protecting us and others. I am pretty disgusted by your post to be honest. Frankly you have no idea what happens within a veterans charity.

The government dont give a shit. They're doing their best to do as little as possible and making sure there is enough in the pot for their bonus. I dont understand how people in this country dont see this.

People are very much struggling!! It's a dame disgrace that NOTHINGis being done..

My husband is currently a marine. He retires in 3 years. He's done more tours than most. 7 in total. I can't think of anyone worse to sit and home school our kids. No patience what so ever. Any mundane task isn't really going to interest a marine however, I suppose it depends how long he's had to adjust.

Ah I know this guy.

Lol sorry I replied to the original post then clicked on the article.

Also there are two doing it. He doesn't go to work everyday and yes he has his charity and the documentary he is filming but still 2 adults at home most of the time.

I've had arguments. I'm now setting some groundwork. 9-3 with a half hour walk and one hour lunch break. If it all doesn't get done, so be it. Maths and reading in the morning, afternoon topics in the afternoon.

I agree with you get children it’s a nightmare and I think just let them play and craft and if you can half hour of phonics and a bit of maths fine then we’ll done you - if you can’t, don’t worry about it, they’ll catch up.
My boys are older - older one yr 8 in private school, it’s amazing he logs on, teacher is there, normal timetable and he’s on it - taught all day as per usual timetable. State school yr 6 is a joke, teacher sees them twice a week for half hour on google classroom - and just sets such boring topic work with complicated access, loads of links and the downloading it on padlet - which you need more yet more codes for and so many links and videos and more access codes. I’m not techy - I HATE it.

Personally I'm glad I don't have school age kids at home. I used to find helping with homework incredibly stressful.
With my mental health all over the place, I know that homeschooling would send me over the edge.
Reading would be my limit.
I salute all you parents who are doing their best in a shit situation.

I'm sure everyone is doing their best but what I would ask of the teachers is that they read and consider before posting worksheets. We still don't get any live lessons, apparently still looking into it, but we get plenty of worksheets that are not written for self-schooling children (both parents WFH FT). The worksheets often require printers, to carry out work with someone else (e.g. discuss or play game), should be done outdoors, or the instructions don't resemble the terminology (e.g. maths) used in class. It's impossible and really upsetting for the kids when there is an expectation that there are adults available. Schools should be setting work on the assumption that children do not have instant access to an adult. That way at least everyone would have the same fighting chance.

I agree it has been absolutely horrible home schooling. It has definitely damaged my relationship with DC. The schools do have to be shut at this point in time. I'm more annoyed with my boss than anyone else who could have an impact on my mental health. Out of sight is out of mind. He doesn't give a second thought to what it's like trying to work in a very demanding job with primary age DC doing home learning.

So what would you do with the children?. You can't send them to school - teachers ( union ) threatened legal action if schools remained open. Companies need to carry on or there will be no jobs to eventually go back to. It's a Catch 22 situation. Damned if you do, damned if you don't. Maybe if more had adhered to the guidelines we wouldn't have needed this 3rd lockdown. One parent at Dd school refused to wear a mask as ' I don't believe in it '. Nothing anyone could do as on a public footpath waiting and mixing with other parents.

They shouldn't expect parents to home school and work.

I think we’re all struggling tbh.

I have 5 DC and I’m homeschooling the older 3 whilst juggling the younger 2 and keeping the house in order. This is my maternity leave, I return to work as a teacher in September. I’m supposed to be relaxing with my baby, instead I’m teaching my primary school children. It’s tough and I’m on the verge of a breakdown most of the time.

However, to add some perspective, my best friend doesn’t have children because she lost her baby two years ago so it’s not through choice. She’s struggled mentally for years, ever since she lost her Mum aged 18. The past 10 months have crippled her mentally, she hasn’t been able to work for the majority and she’s going stir crazy at home alone. I don’t think my life is tougher than hers, she’d probably love to have my brood.

So, I don’t think parents are struggling far more than anyone else. Truly think most of us are struggling mentally for different reasons.