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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have lost all motivation for anything

625 replies

Pleidiolwyfimgwlad · 18/01/2021 17:30

Is the endlessness of lockdown getting to anyone else? I seem to have lost all motivation for tidying the house, cooking, homeschooling, my job - all of it.

Me & the kids walk every day but that’s about it - it’s the relentlessness of it all that’s really getting to me I think. I just want to sit about eating toast & sleeping- I’d take to my bed if I didn’t have kids to look after.

I have quite a big job at a uni too and even the thought of it makes me feel depressed. It’s awful- I am fed up of my colleagues and they are lovely people so I feel bad.

Aibu to have just lost all mojo? I don’t think I am depressed- just OVER it all- I don’t even know what I need at the moment!

OP posts:
MiaMarshmallows · 29/01/2021 13:24

Really down today. Missing DP so much. It's unbearable.

listsandbudgets · 29/01/2021 13:54

I called a halt to distance learning after English and maths had been done and sent both DCs to their rooms with half a pizza each and some token salad to do whatever they like watch videos on their tablets

I had a full on proper migraine earlier in the week and I'm not over it yet really. Very tempted to go to bed and listen to the radio for a bit.

Bolognaise defrosting for dinner. Hopefully I'll find the energy to boil some pasta and grate some cheese but it may be a push then I'll whip up a terrific pudding the kitkat icecream I got in the co-op the other day

So pissed of with distance learning. I'm expected to be the font of knowledge on everything from the flipping failures of the Weimar republic, how to write a horror story, the 24 hour clock, the formation of blackholes and conjugating irregular French verbs in the past tense... all I really want to do is lie in bed guzzling crisps and ice cream :(

SingToTheSky · 29/01/2021 14:23

Aaargh self isolating here. DH now has symptoms. I’ve not generally been too anxious about the virus itself but it’s shooting up high now - oddly I’m much more worried than when DS had to test before Christmas (negative but took a while to come back).

I guess it’s because I’m not really coping with anything myself atm so if DH is unwell we are screwed - he’s not functioning too well at the best of times anyway so if any or all of us are ill on top I foresee things falling apart very quickly. And with DD1 being very dyslexic with other LDs we really can’t afford to get behind on her work, she needs a lot of support. 3yo is an absolute nightmare when bored and has already been living on Mickey Mouse’s bastarding clubhouse on Disney+

HeronLanyon · 29/01/2021 15:06

Mia - I sympathise. I’ve seen my dp for about 10 days total since September. Zoom only goes so far. Support.

micc · 29/01/2021 15:19

Ugh same! I have a 4yr old and a 3 month old and it's just relentless. I'm so so so grateful I have OH with me or I would of gone mad. I get so anxious about taking my baby out.. I have a panic attack every time. I dont know where this has come from, I'm just getting overwhelmed by everything. I look back at the first lockdown fondly which is weird. But It was definitely the weather. We dont have a garden, but my parents were still working and we live close. So we would walk to theirs and sit in their garden all day! Wave to them through the windows.
Seems like a life time ago. The start of 2020 I was newly pregnant and I was so excited for my pregnancy. I feel a bit robbed, but I'm grateful we are healthy. Just wish I could cuddle my friends and have them round for a cuppa :( DD is really missing her friends too.

Fembot123 · 29/01/2021 16:43

@micc

Ugh same! I have a 4yr old and a 3 month old and it's just relentless. I'm so so so grateful I have OH with me or I would of gone mad. I get so anxious about taking my baby out.. I have a panic attack every time. I dont know where this has come from, I'm just getting overwhelmed by everything. I look back at the first lockdown fondly which is weird. But It was definitely the weather. We dont have a garden, but my parents were still working and we live close. So we would walk to theirs and sit in their garden all day! Wave to them through the windows. Seems like a life time ago. The start of 2020 I was newly pregnant and I was so excited for my pregnancy. I feel a bit robbed, but I'm grateful we are healthy. Just wish I could cuddle my friends and have them round for a cuppa :( DD is really missing her friends too.
Ahh Micc that’s poo Flowers
EveryDayIsADuvetDay · 29/01/2021 16:49

recovering from coronavirus - the perfect excuse for not even thinking I should be tidying/cleaning/eating anything other than microwave curry.

aquashiv · 29/01/2021 17:42

Respect to all those that move.
I bought a steps watch to try to shame me into moving more. It buzzes at me now to remind me to get up move. I am lucky if I do a 1000 steps let alone 10 feckin thousand. I found myself shouting at it to shut up. The left it on in the bath so hopefully, I have killed it.
The monotonous is killing

rookiemere · 29/01/2021 18:58

I thought this thread had died as it disappeared from my "I'm on" feed, so glad that it hasn't.

Off today which should have made me feel happier but didn't really. Works not going brilliantly- I'm just struggling to put in more than the absolute bare minimum, and it's catching up with me.

My friend who I was meant to meet for a walk cancelled on me, and the other friend I subsequently convinced to come out then cancelled because of the weather. I wandered round our mostly empty shopping mall, with the arrowed directions and loud hailer covid instructions I imagine it's not far off the feel of a soviet bloc retail centre.

I had a fit of crying in the car because I had to go round the roundabout twice as someone was edging out. I just don't feel very much in control of my emotions any more. I'm not sure the St Johns Wort is helping - it's making me blurry round the edges - but I bought a few more packs just to be on the safe side.

Frozenintime · 29/01/2021 21:47

@rookiemere I bought some StJohn's wort today. Not sure if it takes time to start working ? Hid upstairs in tears this evening. DH is WFH and never goes out. Our teen can't see anyone /socialise/ have any fun. I was stood washing up and bam it just hit me. Another 6+ weeks of this !

rookiemere · 29/01/2021 22:00

@Frozenintime I've been taking it for almost two weeks now, I think it can take up to 28 days to work.
It's just so relentless, I wouldn't say I'm a naturally jolly person, but I'm usually relatively upbeat. I don't remember being like this first time round, although I did struggle towards the end of home schooling as I was so worried about DS 14 falling behind. But that was a definite reason iyswim this time home schooling is fine and I've been working less hours, but just generally feeling overwhelmed and sad.

Frozenintime · 29/01/2021 22:43

@rookiemere my DS is also 14. What's getting me down is the total lack of activity. We are now effectively trapped together and my nerves are jangling. He's allowed on the playstation after lessons. It is in the living room, so we have to listen to that. Our choice, so it can be supervised but omg really annoying.

Fembot123 · 29/01/2021 22:56

My younger DD is now having friendship issues and I find it so distressing that they can infiltrate our home via her phone but I don’t want to punish her for being picked on by removing it, another layer of stress

rookiemere · 29/01/2021 22:59

DS has his xbox in his room, which means with the online teaching we barely see him Reasonably confident he's just doing school work and playing Fifa as hear him talking to his mates. Probably should try to do more as a family, but there we go. Last term he was rugby and football training and playing and now there's nothing except the xbox and litter picking that he's doing for Duke of Edinburgh with his friend.

Redburnett · 29/01/2021 23:07

On 'Mock the week' there was a question about the significance of 100 days - one joke answer was the number of days in this January. That resonated with me, it is going on forever, day after day with little to distinguish them. I went for a walk for about an hour for the first 25 days before I just lost motivation. My DH asked my plans yesterday morning. I replied 'I might get up...'.unable to think of anything beyond that.

Nonamesavail · 29/01/2021 23:35

@Fembot123

My younger DD is now having friendship issues and I find it so distressing that they can infiltrate our home via her phone but I don’t want to punish her for being picked on by removing it, another layer of stress
This is stressful. We have this issue right now.
hellotesting123123 · 29/01/2021 23:53

Same. I've recently gotten a contract for 10 days a month for £750 a day (I'm a freelancer) on top of some other really nice work. Perfect for saving for a flat deposit. But I just can't be arsed to do it and am working myself up to saying I need to reduce down to 4 days max. I'm just procrastinating and doing nothing so better not to lose it from being shit. But then what do I do instead? Stare at a grey sky out of the window, in my concrete jungle of a neighbourhood, where I live alone? Its fucking miserable. And I know I should feel lucky and grab it with both hands but I dont have the strength.

KitKat1985 · 30/01/2021 08:55

@Frozenintime and @rookiemere just so as you both know, (and you likely already do but some don't), that St. Johns wort reduces the effectiveness of oral contraceptive pills, so just be mindful of that if you are on the pill. Hope you both feel better soon. x

LadyfromtheBelleEpoque · 30/01/2021 10:51

What do you do? @hellotesting123123
If you don’t mind me asking

hellotesting123123 · 30/01/2021 17:17

@LadyfromtheBelleEpoque don't mind at all. Senior comms consultant - specialising in sustainability. Its v unusual to get paid that much and tbh I was very ready to go down quite a lot, youre just told to start high with day rates. And then the agency just said yes! A bit crazy. But then they charge me out at £2000 a day to corporates (I have a much lower charity rate tho, and a lot of my work is charity).

LadyfromtheBelleEpoque · 30/01/2021 17:31

Thanks @hellotesting123123

Appreciate it. Would you be able to say how you got there? What route/jobs you took to get to that role?

Am asking for self. Am trying to figure out who I am in the world of work as I am certainly not getting a wage commensurate with my ability and skillset.

Orangeblossom1977 · 30/01/2021 17:41

It just feels like a kind of waiting now, very grey here today and freezing cold. Have no motivation for anything. I hope it returns. Flowers to anyone struggling.

hellotesting123123 · 30/01/2021 17:48

Hi @LadyfromtheBelleEpoque it's been about 15 years in the making! I'm not sure anyone else will be interested on this thread (and I really hope i haven't come across as bragging here - I know there are many that have lost their jobs and I'm very lucky) - but why don't you send me a DM with details of what you're doing now / what skills you have and I could maybe give you some pointers on how that might translate into my industry?

hellotesting123123 · 30/01/2021 17:50

Back to demotivation...today I am deciding to be proud of myself for taking out the bins. My flat is still an absolute tip, but I am so so tired of cleaning all the time.

I think we should all celebrate the small wins at the moment.

LadyfromtheBelleEpoque · 30/01/2021 17:52

@hellotesting123123

Good point and yes, sorry I have derailed the thread. Will send you a DM, thanks

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